General Dating Questions/Dating a divorced man


Hello Dennis!

I recently started dating a nice sweet extremely handsome guy I met online, we have tons in common and we are both educated. We hit it off very well. He is an absolutely lovely guy, sweet, shy, smart, funny, kind and compassionate. When he kissed me, he was very gentle and sweet and held me gently for a while. And we've been on about 4 dates now. Everything just feels right :)

Well, turns out he was married for 10 years and his wife cheated on him and left him for another guy (even before she had sex with the guy! It was an emotional affair. She just took off) She's the only woman he's been with in his entire life.

He did not have any anger towards her or trash talk her, he simply told me this was what had happened, and he spent a year or two trying to get over it. His buddies took him to strip clubs and he wasn't into it, he wanted to be in a relationship again. Our first was the day his divorce was finalized. lol.

So i have never dated a newly divorced guy, do you have any advice for me as to how to proceed?

Thank you

Hello Hannah!

There's really no advice to give. You don't have to act or do anything differently than you would with someone who has never been married - at least not with this guy.

It sounds like he's dealt with the situation and has moved on. He's telling you things about his past but doesn't sound like he's emotionally tied to it.

Thus, other than just being a little unskilled (due to lack of experience) in dating, I'd recommend you treat this like anyone else you've dated.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder


I'm able to answer any sort of question related to the approach, meeting people, dating, sex, relationships, break-ups, non-legal marriage and divorce questions, and anything in between. I've helped over 30,000 people with their individual issues. IMPORTANT: Please, PLEASE don't ask me, "what was he thinking..." or "why did he say..." types of questions! I DO NOT READ MINDS! There are 1,001 reasons why someone does what they do, says what they say or thinks what they think. If you *REALLY* want to know what they were thinking, saying or why they were acting that way - go ask them! Be sure to check out my FAQ's on my website at: You can email me directly at:


I am the author of the books "Being a Man in a Woman`s World I & II" and "1001 Places and Techniques to Meet Great Women" and 11 others. I`ve spent the last 20 years studying the art and science of every aspect of relationships, and have answered over 30,000 letters from readers all over the world. My main focus is men`s relationships with women, but I also have many female readers and answer questions for them regularly as well.

Doctor of Philosophy

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