General Dating Questions/"Dating help"

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Question
So, I met a guy from tinder, & he's super cute.. I gave him my # one night & he texted me the next morning. We sent a text or two and he called me right away asking if I wanted to get sushi & I said sure. We Had a really good time, he was kissing me in my cheek and we were asking relationship questions & he asked me what are you looking for? & I said I'm not the relationship type. I was feeling the guy & it's a lie. I want one but didn't want to sound needy, (think I sounded slutty) he looked turned off & said oh? I said that's not what i meant. I'm picky. And I find flaws fast..

we started kissing, & I haven't felt a spark like that in a while.. He even said wow. we hung out for 2 hours only b/c he said he had to go to work. So he asked what I was doing later & we hung out at fat Tuesday's around 11 pm when he was out & I think I turned him off again b/c he asked me what do you think about what's important? & said looks not personality. I laughed thinking he'd get my joke.. I'm interested in the heart but looks help. he smirked & looked down. we Got pizza, & after he said I want to lay down with you.. Let's go to my house & I had told him I had my period so he knew we weren't doing crap. We get there & I ended up giving him oral and the next morning took me home. I texted him 5 hours later saying "hope you have a great day :*" no reply.

It all happened Friday, SAT he took me home in the am & after I sent the text. It's been 2 days! Was he turned off? What did I do wrong?

Answer
Sarah,

instead of being an honest and upfront girl about what you were really looking for, you were playing the field; scoping out whether it was safe for you to be vulnerable with him and actually create something. Rather than being honest with yourself and potentially getting a win, you've lost in this situation, twice. The first time was when you could have just ended a hopeless relationship if he wasn't interested in having a relationship, and the second loss was when you gave him oral when he surely did not deserve, yet.

I find that I am getting these types of questions the most. Rather than just honestly putting things out there, you cheat yourself of pure happiness. One that doesn't require lying to figure out whether he wants a relationship or not and one that fulfills real emotional and physical pleasure. This guy was turned off for several reasons. For one, he could read you like a book; you were desperate for love and attention. He kept asking you very mature questions and in response you were immature and said false things. Also, after having discombobulated your intentions in why you were meeting him in the first place, you fooled around with him. Guys aren't interested in filling in the blanks. They are black and white minded people who want things to be either or. Don't allow yourself to be drawn into the Hollywood ideals of what guys really want in relationships. Those types who are drawn to the hard to get girls are really not ones you want to invest your time and efforts with.

Hope this helps you in getting through the dating maze,

Becky

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Becky

Expertise

I can answer almost everything. I am religious person who strongly believes in G-d. If spiritual guidance is also something that you are seeking for, then I am careful and competent in that region. I am also very aware that it's hard to ask for help, with that being said, I am sensitive to others feelings and have gone through hardships in relationships, which demonstrates a quality of empathy and consciousness when it comes to everyday dating situations. I can answer break-up confusions/confusions in dating in general. I can NOT read minds and can answer to the best of my ability in regards to the detail you provide me. With that in consideration, please do not send me pages of information. Pick the most important and effective way to explain the problem and we can make this our problem and our solution together.

Experience

I have been in confusing relationships. Most of all I was in a 5 year relationship that really helped me in developing my intellect and sensitivities, which also played a huge role in discovering myself and those around me.

Organizations
Chai Life Line; deals with special needs children

Education/Credentials
Bachelor of Arts in English Literature Certified teacher in Canada; recognized internationally

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