General Dating Questions/Confusing Crush


Hello James,

I have a question on how to proceed in the following situation. There's this girl who I have a crush on. One day she posted something on facebook about crushes send a kissy face and I responded. I sent her an email and she replied "oh..." I then asked her if I offended her and apologized. Her response was "?" I then further explained. Lol the other day when I told you I liked you. You seemed rather put off... I'll admit a facebook game probably isn't/wasn't the best way to reveal a crush on someone. Anyway I think you're pretty smart, well cultured, and highly diversified. If you don't mind. I'd like to get to know you better. Maybe we could hangout sometime? Her response was "I'd be down for that but I'm not looking for a relationship." I said that was cool. We talked some more and eventually agreed to go for a walk together tomorrow and have lunch my treat. She thinks it's awesome but she can't promise she'll be looking cute.  My question is how do I proceed in this situation? Am I completely friendzoned with no hope or is there at least a small amount of interest on her part? Why would she want to go for a walk and have lunch with a guy if she truly has no interest? What do I do? Thank you for your help.



I think she is probably just being friendly. So if you think up to now you've given her any weird vibes now might be a good time to be down to earth and casual. Just set up the meet and don't try too hard. This maybe only the first step of what could be something or just a friendship. Pace yourself accordingly. This isn't game hunting. lol.

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First and foremost if you read ahead you'll find I have a word limit on questions I'll read. This site is for short simple questions and it should not be for writing essays. Please also note I am unfamilar with most cultures outside of United Stated, UK, and France. Please respect my rules. I don't like rejecting questions. I will be the first to admit that I don't know everything about dating, women/men, and interpersonal connections. However I have learned quite a bit vicariously from other people's experiences. Think of my advice as a second opinion. I would be happy to answer all questions related to relationships, dating, self-confidence, and self-image that I can. I have struggled with all of those things and probably know better than most how to deal with all of them.

I hope more than anything that my advice and opinions will help give people perspective in their lives, and hopefully make them feel better about themselves and their situations. I will attempt answering questions for anyone of any age group or nationality. However it would be particularly useful to know the age of all people involved. It does make a difference towards the advice I give. Also not terribly familar with arranged marriages and situations in which the family can dictate the details of the relationship.

My Rules:
1). I can't answer questions that ask if a girl or guy likes the other (very difficult to know remotely)
2). No questions that are More Than 250 Words. I understand that problems can be complex, but there is a real limit to how much I can read and fully understand. Particularly if English isn't the questioner's native language.
3). Only questions from Americans, Canadians, British, and cute French women.
4). No questions that ask the meaning behind if a person sets their FB status to single, coupled, or private or if they still have a dating profile undeleted somewhere. If you're cyber snooping you're likely the issue.


I don't really have any specific experience in this area other than learning from other people's mistakes and a few of my own, and whatever I've learned as a psychology major.

B.S. Psychology

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