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General Dating Questions/Exclusive but updated profile?


Me and my guy became exclusive yesterday after three months--- I started to ask him and he knew what I was asking so he goes "yes, we're exclusive." In a nice way. So I was super excited but we didn't talk about taking profiles down... N then i noticed next day that he updated his match profile and added a couple things on his favorite things part....Do I let this go or what? We didn't talk about removing profiles... This is not the site we met on--- that site he hasn't logged on in months... I've eluded before that I was on this site also tho ... I thought it's not so bad since it's not like he added a pic or rewrote his entire profile...he is always good with his word doesn't cancel on me , calls me when he says he will. He just met some coworker friends and we all had a great time. When he mentioned being exclusive he took s few second pause and I said something like "jeez took u long enough why are you hesitating?!" So he got upset at that ... I apologized the next morning and said I'm sorry for what I said yest he's like what did u say? I'm like for assuming stuff and commenting about the exclusivity thing . He just kinda laughed and that was that....
I know he's guarded--- he's been hurt a lot in the past and he was engaged once where they broke it off
Cuz she wanted to move and he couldn't cuz of work.. Anyway what do you think?

Hi Sara,

Thanks for the message and congratulations on going exclusive!

I do have to have ask did you know he updated his Match profile? Do you still have a profile on there?  If so he will be able to see that you've recently logged in too. So perhaps he's just trying to see how you react.

Three months is quite soon but you should both at least hide your profiles for now. There's no reason for either of you to need to be on there now but it's not really a big deal at this stage.

Your best option is to give him the benefit of the doubt. If you challenge him over it then it will cause tension and arguments. If you let him know you've seen it then he might just block your profile and you lose the ability to see it.

In another month or two it's perfectly reasonable to suggest you both take down your profiles.  I'm sure he'll feel comfortable enough to do that then.  It sounds like he's the sort of guy you'll need to take things slowly with.

I wish you good luck and I have a good feeling about this :)

Best Wishes,


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James Preece


I'm the UK's leading Dating Coach. I'm the only Dating Expert to actually work in the dating industry and I'm happy to answer any dating queries you have.


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