General Writing and Grammar Help/a question

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Question
Dear ted,
Please help me with following statements again. If you have any idea to express these statements in
another way or better, please let me know.

1- Honorably, I would rather to suggest some solutions. (actually, I have translated this statement from Farsi to English. Is it suitable to use such statement in a formal letter)

2- I want to find out whether it goes back to "Hakhamaneshi" dynasty.

3_ I want to find out it goes back to "Hakhamaneshi" dynasty or not.

4- It is really appreciated if your historic experts could give a look to those photos and let me know about their points of view. (is this statement official?)

5- ... So in this way, I could deliver the stone to a pertinent museum or center if it is really a valuable object.

Answer
Dear Ali:

Dear ted,
Please help me with following statements again. If you have any idea to express
these statements in
another way or better, please let me know.

1- Honorably, I would rather to suggest some solutions. (actually, I have
translated this statement from Farsi to English. Is it suitable to use such
statement in a formal letter)

*** First, I do not understand the use of the word "honorably" at the beginning of the
sentence.  I cannot think of what you mean and suggest a better word for you to use.  I think this version of the rest of the sentence is better:  I would like to suggest some solutions.

2- I want to find out whether it goes back to "Hakhamaneshi" dynasty.

*** Good.  I would add "the" after "back to."

3_ I want to find out it goes back to "Hakhamaneshi" dynasty or not.

*** Good, except one word is missing:  I want to find out IF it goes back . . . .

4- It is really appreciated if your historic experts could give a look to those
photos and let me know about their points of view. (is this statement official?)

*** Suggested revision:  I would really appreciate it if your history experts could look
at those photos and let me know their points of view.

Ali, what you have written is very good. I suggest the little changes just to make the sentences more "English" in style.

5- ... So in this way, I could deliver the stone to a pertinent museum or center
if it is really a valuable object.

*** YES -- This sentence is VERY CLEAR.  There are no errors.

Good for you!

Ted  

General Writing and Grammar Help

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Ted Nesbitt

Expertise

I am the bibliographic instruction and reference librarian at a public college. Some members of the English department recommend me to their students. I offer assistance in grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, and paragraph development. My master`s thesis concerns William Faulkner`s tragic novels. I formerly taught advanced placement English at two schools in the Philadelphia area.

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I have been one of the highest-ranked volunteers in this category for more than a decade.

Education/Credentials
B. A. and M. A in English; MSIS in Library & Information Sciences; graduate study in philosophy

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