General Writing and Grammar Help/a question

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Question
Dear Ted,

I have not been in touch for a while because I have taken an IELTS exam. Unfortunately, my reading score was not satisfactory. You cannot imagine how exhausted I am. Again I am trying to regenerate myself to take next one. So, please help me with following statements again. If you have any idea to express these statements in another way or better, please let me know.

1- Ö If it is possible, please do this favor for me and correct my mistake. Otherwise, do I have to make a new profile?, Or I can edit my profile.

2- Ted, when I am describing the story of an advertisement I saw before, can I use simple present tense?

3- A pair of wings grows (or grow) on his shoulder.

4- Any private note (or) any private notes.

5- Donít attend two-hour classes more than three times a week.

6- Please send to (or give) Susan my sincere thanks because of her sense of responsibility.

Answer
Dear Ali:

I have not been in touch for a while because I have taken an IELTS exam.
Unfortunately, my reading score was not satisfactory. You cannot imagine how
exhausted I am. Again I am trying to regenerate myself to take next one. So,
please help me with following statements again. If you have any idea to express
these statements in another way or better, please let me know.

*** I am sorry about your reading score.  I wish I could help you.  Now that you know what the exam requires, you will do better on your second try.  I am sure of that.

***********

1- Ö If it is possible, please do this favor for me and correct my mistake.
Otherwise, do I have to make a new profile?, Or I can edit my profile.

Your sentences are fine, with one exception:  After your first use of "profile," use ONLY the question mark.  Do NOT place a comma after the question mark.

2- Ted, when I am describing the story of an advertisement I saw before, can I
use simple present tense?

*** YES, you can describe the advertisement in the present tense.  Just make certain that ALL you write is in the present tense.  EXAMPLE:  The airline has a clever advertisement.  It begins with a passenger entering the plane and goes on to show some humorous things that happen to him.

3- A pair of wings grows (or grow) on his shoulder.

*** "Pair" is singular, although it suggests two items.  Use the singular "grows."

4- Any private note (or) any private notes.

*** If there is just ONE note, use NOTE.  If you mean to write about more than one private note, you must use the plural form, NOTES.

5- Donít attend two-hour classes more than three times a week.

*** CORRECT

6- Please send to (or give) Susan my sincere thanks because of her sense of
responsibility.

*** I recommend "give," because it suggests that the person to whom you are speaking is in contact with Susan.  If you use "send," you are suggesting that the other person would be
"sending" [as in writing a note] the message.  You can do THAT yourself.

Ali, when I copy your original message, for some strange reason, the apostrophes do not show up.  In #6, you have written "don't" but when I copy the words, there is no apostrophe.  I have answered using the apostrophe, but I don't know if it will appear in my answer.  It SHOULD be there, but there is something about the Allexperts system that affects certain marks of punctuation.

Best wishes,

Ted

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Ted Nesbitt

Expertise

I am the bibliographic instruction and reference librarian at a public college. Some members of the English department recommend me to their students. I offer assistance in grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, and paragraph development. My master`s thesis concerns William Faulkner`s tragic novels. I formerly taught advanced placement English at two schools in the Philadelphia area.

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I have been one of the highest-ranked volunteers in this category for more than a decade.

Education/Credentials
B. A. and M. A in English; MSIS in Library & Information Sciences; graduate study in philosophy

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