Gifted Children/Gifted child


QUESTION: My daughter is very smart, she is only 3 years old has an amazing memory, reads,loves numbers and maths, speaks two languages the list goes on. My problem is her pre school has told me to discourage from any further learning and replace with more play because it will cause problems when it comes to her going to first school with boredom. So that's what I've done, but her behaviour has been horrid she gets so frustrated and the last couple of time I've picked her up from pre school the teacher said she'd wet herself which is really out of character. I just want to do the Wright thing by my daughter and would really appreciate some advice.


I've been out of town and just got your question. I'm working on your answer.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Just wondered if you had chance to look over my previous question?

I can sense how concerned you are and probably feeling helpless. What a weird, and harmful thing to say - school I mean. Telling you not to let her learn is beyond bizarre. If they knew kids at all they should know a child is ALWAYS learning, whether in a formal setting or otherwise. It isn't even possible to stop a kid from learning if you try. Play is learning. I'm sure that wetting her pants has been terribly hard for you, too, and causing you terrible worry. It is associated with stress. My son had a similar problem at a camp that turned out to be horrible. I had to pull him out of it. Do you have the option of having your daughter go to a different preschool? By what they said I can tell it's not a nurturing, growing place, and that's probably not going to change.

You'll need encouragement yourself because raising smarter kids can be more challenging than raising kids of average intelligence. Good resources are:

Free Spirit Publishing,, has lots of different types of materials for interacting in families and all kinds of books that you can learn from about giftedness, emotions, relationships, and more. You can trust their material. Another source for you is, a service of the American Academy of Pediatrics, with info about all things kids. The American Academy of Family Physicians has a similar site, for everyone in the family, The Critical Thinking Company is fun and there's lots of exciting learning tools.

You can find other mothers struggling with the same kind of issues, and can form support groups, online, or locally. You can give each other encouragement, and you won't have to feel so alone with the challenges of gifted kids. They need firm discipline even more than average kids.

I want you to stop being so hard on yourself. You and your daughter are growing up together - you as parent and she as child. You're a good mom. You recognized that you don't know everything and reached out. It sets a good example for your daughter too. A lot of parents would ignore what's going on while their child falls apart.

It's very important to have fun, the sillier the better. Have an all ice-cream dinner night. Put on old clothes and finger-paint each other, you can find lots of ideas.

Thank you for your patience and for letting me serve you. Thank you for reminding me that I hadn't answered your question yet. Please return to me for encouragement and with questions. If you are married, the best thing you can do for kids is to make your marriage high priority.


Gifted Children

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Faith A. Coleman MD


No questions are off-limits. My strengths are understanding what questioners are really trying to ask, knowing the right questions to get to useful answers, and putting complicated, subject-specific words and concepts into language accessible to lay-persons. The topic is fascinating and can be surprising, the opposite of what might logically seem expected of giftedness. I am skilled in identifying giftedness at any age, including very early in life.


Children constitute about one-third of the patients in a Family Medicine practice. I was Director of Children's and Women's Public Health Education Programs with the Northeast Texas Public Health District. I have two highly gifted children, one of whom attended Roeper School, listed first in this site's Sponsored Links. I was the health expert for Roeper's board of directors; I maintain contacts there. I'm on the board of directors of several organizations of which I'm a member. I spent a summer as the Medical Director of a camp for kids with ADD, ADHD, and psychiatric disorders. Editor, Medical Economics Publishing Co. licensure to teach K-12 in Oklahoma, with added qualification in Journalism

Champions for Children: Advocacy, resources, quality assessment, for early childhood daycare (Board of Directors). American Academy of Family Physicians. Michigan Academy of Family Physicians Society of Teachers of Family Medicine. READ: Advocacy, education, resources for teaching and encouraging literacy in adults. East Texas Network for Children (Planning Board).

Journals: Medical Economics, Contemporary OB/Gyn, Diagnostic Medicine. Albuquerque Journal Daily, Tyler Daily News, New Mexico Daily Lobo, New Citizen Weekly, Alpena News, daily.

BA, Journalism MD University of New Mexico School of Medicine. Internship, Detroit Medical Center. Family Practice Residency, Top-100 Hospital - Beaumont. Clinical Faculty appointments to three medical schools. Faculty, Family Practice Residency, Detroit area.

Awards and Honors
Two official commendations awarded by United States Army for service and contributions to young soldiers and families. Publishing Internship, Medical Economics Publishing Company. Research Internship, Hastings Institute of Society, Ethics, and the Life Sciences. Woman Medical Student of the Year. Numerous others.

Past/Present Clients
As above in experiences, publications and awards. Many thousands of patient/family encounters.

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