How to Have Great Sex/How to make sex good


Hi, I am worried at the moment as my gf never seems to want sex. We have it about once every 3 days and she doesn't seem to enjoy it, what do i do? She told me once that her ex was 8" so I'm scared that might be why she doesn't enjoy it with me as i am 3.5", is that really under average? will a girl find it hard to accept a smaller penis after having a big one?

Hello Glen,

Thank you for your question.

"Normal" penis size is between 5 1/2" - 6" erect.  However, it is not the size of your penis that matters, but how you use it. Also, most women orgasm via clitoral stimulation, so penis size doesn't really matter all that much when it comes to stimulating the clitoris.  What matters is how you perform at oral sex, finger stimulation and even using toys like clitoral vibrators.  Also, women take a long time to get turned on, so foreplay is very important.  If she is very turned on after long foreplay, and then has clitoral stimulation and an orgasm, I don't think she would be worried about your penis size. So touch her all over, in an erotic, sensual, stimulating way, playing special attention to HER pleasure zones, and getting her off first. Most women don't get off from penetrative sex, and that is normal, not matter what the penis size is.

Also, the most sensitive area of a woman's vagina, the G spot, is only 1-2" in depth, so a short penis can satisfy that area if you use the right positions during intercourse.

So, I think rather than worrying about your penis size, look for ways to get better at foreplay, sex, and becoming a better lover.  

Also, ask her what she likes.  During sex, ask her does this feel good, or would you like me to do this, etc...  Find out what she likes, and explore all her pleasure zones.  If it turns out that the only thing that will pleasure her is a large penis, you can also get penis extenders that are worn over the penis to extend your length and girth. But, I think trying different ways to satisfy her is probably all you need to do.

I hope this answer helps.  If you have any more questions, let me know.


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I am happy to answer any questions about human sexuality and how to have great sex. Which positions facilitate G-spot pleasure? What is the best way to explore anal sex for the first time? How can I spice up my sex life? Is kinky sex right for me, and how can I safely explore it? Sex positions, types of orgasm for men and women, how to prolong or delay orgasms, multiple orgasms, Tantra and more... And, don't forget types of foreplay and setting the mood. Feel free to ask me these or any questions you have about how to have great sex.


As as pleasure consultant, I have worked for 6 years in various sex toy shops, including brick and mortar shops where I advised customers on what types of toys they may like to purchase, as well as educating them on the toys and sexuality in general. I have an established sex toy review blog with over 5000 articles, reviews and sexual information posts, and have gained a reputation as a sexuality expert.

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