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How to Have Great Sex/Sex- ruining relationships


I'm 25 and although I'm not a virgin I have never been in a serious sexual relationship and am fairly inexperienced .
I've never had sex with someone for the first time when I've been sober and find it very awkward to begin sexual relationships.
How can I relax around men and will they be put off by my inexperience when it comes down to it?

I suggest you start by relaxing and deciding that sex is something fun and enjoyable that you want to do.  You might also avoid being drunk and instead talk with a prospective partner about sexual expectations and a timeline.  If you don't want to talk like that, then at the very least be sober you can decide at a particular moment when things heat up whether you want to be sexual or whether you would rather wait for another time.

I very much doubt men would be put off by your inexperience.  It will be easiest for you to relax when things are happen as you would like them to and not merely by chance.

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Doug Adams, Ph.D.


I am willing to answer questions in all areas of sexuality. I have been giving advice to both males and females for over 13 years, and in that time I have answered thousands of questions. I advocate taking healthy practices into account in engaging sexually.


I have written the web site for over 13 years, taking questions from both males and females on sexuality.

I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading educational institutions of the world.

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