How to Have Great Sex/Bruising during sex


QUESTION: My wife has an unexplained bruise high on her right hip and on her left side of her upper thigh. Lately she has asked for me to grab her hips hard during cowgirl.

How vigorous does sex have to be to cause bruising and are these common places for bruises during sex?

She doesn't easily bruise.

ANSWER: Rough sex can easily cause bruising.  She sure seems to enjoy cowgirl.  I'm not sure why you think the bruise is unexplained when you explained so well how she got it.  I think many of the people who read this page would like to be in your situation.  With practice, you can be rough in bed and not cause bruises.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: She can't recall getting the bruises. There was also a scratch on her inner arm. We had sex that way after the bruise.

I am suspicious she has been unfaithful.

That is a serious accusation to make.  You obviously need more evidence than that.  People get bruised all the time that they can't remember how it happened.  If it didn't bleed or really hurt, someone doesn't remember every elbow bang, awkward landing while exercising, etc.  I hope your wife has been faithful, but gather more information before you make an accusation that could wreck your life.

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Doug Adams, Ph.D.


I am willing to answer questions in all areas of sexuality. I have been giving advice to both males and females for over 13 years, and in that time I have answered thousands of questions. I advocate taking healthy practices into account in engaging sexually.


I have written the web site for over 13 years, taking questions from both males and females on sexuality.

I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading educational institutions of the world.

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