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How to Have Great Sex/still can't seem to enjoy it

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(18 y/o female)

hi! so i'll get straight to the problem, i've had sex only 4 times but it doesn't seem like it's beginning to hurt any less. i don't understand how it can be pleasurable at all and sometimes i think there's something wrong with me. i feel too 'tight' and my boyfriend gets frustrated and i tell him to bear with me but it really puts a strain on things. what would you recommend in general for me and for my boyfriend and i together? i've heard it's supposed to stop hurting after one or two times because a vagina stretches itself out but i feel like i haven't done anything...i'd appreciate your insight. thanks!

Answer
Four times isn't so many.  Take your time and learn to enjoy it.  I would seriously recommend trying one or more sexual lubes.  Lubes made especially for women would be most helpful to you.  Many people enjoy Astroglide gel.  K-Y Natural Feeling Liquid is also a favorite.  If the problem persists, you should see a gynecologist.

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Doug Adams, Ph.D.

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I am willing to answer questions in all areas of sexuality. I have been giving advice to both males and females for over 13 years, and in that time I have answered thousands of questions. I advocate taking healthy practices into account in engaging sexually.

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I have written the web site HealthyStrokes.com for over 13 years, taking questions from both males and females on sexuality.

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I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading educational institutions of the world.

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