Expert: Lenore - 12/23/2004

Question
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Followup To
Question - my mom is a lesbian, she did not tell me she turned a lesbian until last year, she actually wne tou with my girlfriend and had a lesbian relationship one year ago. I never knew my mom was a lesbian relationship,she said it was also sexual and had sex with my girlfriend 1 year and a half ago. I have been dating my girlfriend for 6 months now. do you think knowing what my mom told me, should this change the relationship with my girlfriend know she slept wit my mom frequently a year and a half ago? what should I do about this situation. My girlfriend kelly also told me, and i told her still love her, and but I still don't know how to deal with it meaning what should I do? should i talk to my mom and Kelly about the relationship they had or what? and should I now aks my mom about sex tips since she slept with kelly a year and a half ago frequently. When I took classes at night they were in the same jacuzzi in the backyard, the same jacuzzi me and kelly have romance as well.  what are your suggestions?
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Followup To
Question - I did not aks her to marry her, but she herself wants us to live together. also, we made love, it was beautufiul, she said, since it was my first time , she was not going to give me advice, just do what feels good she told me. also, she has not met my mom yet. but my mom caught me and her in my the jacuzzi in the backyard at night in the  jacuzzi she was topless, and I introduced her to my mom and she was topless and covered herself up with her hands , I still live with my mom , I am 19 and in college, I am a football player and she will come and sse me play at my first game, on the holiday game. also, we took a shower at her place, but my mom caught me kissing her breasts in the jacuzzi, my mom told she had no idea how serious this relationship was, and I told my mom that I was planning on living with her after the summer of 2005. She just has a couple of rules , to tell her when I will bring her into the outdoor jacuzzi so she won't catch us again,and especially cathcing me kissing her breasts or something. She also said, that whenever you sleep together to make sure I tell her so she can stay someweher else and have the whole house together. She also needs to know what would happen if she accidentally come up pregnant, even if I do use a condom.? well, is birth  control better than the condom.? also my mom felt funny having her 36 and me 19. I told eveyrthing is fine. she says as long as I am happy.
and I want to ask you another question, how often should a couple make love? once a week. and do you think it would be nice to masturbate in front of my girlfriend. I want to be sexually open to her, I sometimes masturbate and I want to share that part of my sexuality with her, and she will be 37 in January, what would be good for her birthday?
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Followup To
Question - at what point should I ask her to take a shower with me, do women enjoy showering with a man? and what kinds of things are good to do in shower? what can make a shower more romantic? and what if one day she does come up and gives me oral sex, do i ask for it or does the woman usually asks the man if he wants oral sex?
Hi, what position would be best so that  my girlfriend can enjoy my penis in between her breasts?

also, what should I do if i get on orgasm on her breasts while I am doing that?

and last question, I am a virgin and I am 19 and my girlfriend is 37, and I plan to ask her to mrry me, we have been dating for 6 months and we love each other and tonight will be my frist time makign love, and should I ask her to marry me before the sex or after we the sex? and what brand of condoms are good for sex, and to prevent preganancy? and what kinds of things do people do when they take a shower together and we plan to do that this saturday, any advice on what things are great to do in the shower with my girlfriend? thanks for your help she has big breasts, anything i can do to pleasure her more since she has big breasts?
Answer -
Larry-
Just for your information, women dont usually ENJOY having a penis between their breasts. It dosn't give us any kind of physical pleasure- and possibly a little pain. I would skip it if I were you. But, if you did happen to get sperm on her breasts (or body) you can just wipe it off.
I would wait to propose to her as well. I know you might feel like your in love, but if you want this relationship to last I would take it a little slower. You can also scare her away, which is something I don't think you want. You can buy any condoms- my favorite are Trojan with Spermicidal Lubricant. Spermicide is just a special liquid that kills sperm on contact, lessening your chances of impregnating your girlfriend. She sounds more experienced then you (the age thing), so just follow her lead. She's probably done this a million times, so I wouldn't worry. If she wants you to do something specific, she will let you know.
Good luck!

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Answer -
You should just ask her if she wants to take a bath/shower with you. If she says no, then im suprised that you would be having sex. If she says yes, then you can wash eachother, rub up against eachother, etc etc. Use your imagination! What do you think 2 people would do in a shower together? So- did you ask your girlfriend to marry you?
Answer -
Even with birth control, it is never 100% positive that you can't get her pregnant. Condoms break, and even if a woman is on the pill (or any other kind of birth control), it is not FOR SURE. Most birth control is 99.9% pregnancy prevention. But if you feel more comfortable with her taking birth control in addition to you using condoms (or skipping the condoms- sex is better without condoms. A couple should make love as much as they want it. Some couples have sex 3 times a day, some couples have sex one time a month. I think in a healthy relationship, its a few times a week (average 2-4 times). And with the masturbating- as long as she feels comfortable with it, then sure, do whatever you want! You need to build more sexual comfort. You should also try giving her oral sex- which is licking her vagina (mainly her clit). Her clit is the little bump above her vagina. If you have trouble finding it, ask her to show you where it is. You have a lot to learn about sex and I hope this woman can show you. And about a birthday present- I can't tell you. Maybe, if things are really great around that time, you might want to get an engagement ring and propose to her. But you should start looking soon- and get something tasteful. Even if you can't afford a diamond, there is always Cubic Zirconium (fake diamond) that sells for very cheap. Or, if she has a favorite stone like Garnet you can always get a very nice ring with her favorite stone in it. Make sure you set up a very lovely dinner for her and make sure she can get dressed up along with you- show her a good time! Is she even interested in getting married? Her being 37 probably wants to have kids at some point soon. Are you ready to have children? Does she want to have kids? These are the kinds of things you should be asking her. Let me know-

Answer
You're in a more complicated situation, but if you feel comfortable continuing your relationship with your girlfriend, continue doing so. If you feel comfotable asking your mom for sexual advise, thats fine too. Where did you meet this woman? You might want to see if she has another agenda then just dating you (IE your girlfriend might want to make your mother jealous). ANYTHING you do, don't let your girlfriend and your mother pressure into you having a threesome with either them.