Expert: Melissa Burton (a.k.a Bee) - 8/22/2008

Question
As soon as i enter the classroom of my college,i start putting myself down,my mind start thinking and worrying about people like what they r doing,thinking ,i start thinking about the people who may be thinking about me in a inferior waythat is negative for ex a person standing near is thinking i m stupid.then i start feelin more sad and i completly break physically as wel mentally.Like this everything become like goin through hell .i have no friend now in college.i lived with some people(clasmate since 2 years,they got no prob with me stil feel like a stranger) whm i like but never felt like a friend neither they.My parents r too very negative and unconfident.they always keep blamin keep pointing out all negative things about me. Sometimes i wish i go away frm them even if it is considered mean thing.what should i do to get over al this stuf n how???
Thanku

Answer
Hello
Well you might want to consider seeking therapy. There are usually free counseling services at your college so you might want to take advantage of that since this is clearly something that simple advice could not cure. Some thing you might want to remember is that you are an individual, but so is everybody else. Everybody else is usually thinking about other things/ situations pertaining to their life, not you. All those times that you feel like people think you are a stupid person are most likely false. People never really think that about other people actively... again people are usually concerned with whatever is going on in their life.

You are also in college. There is no reason why you can't make friends. Join a club or try talking to your classmates more often. Try to just be more active and try making friends. College gives you limitless opportunities to meet people and make friends so try and take advantage of that.

Also many people don't get along with their parents. It sounds like eventually you may need to limit your contact with them because it sounds like they are only hurting you and holding you back from becoming a more confident person. either way you need to start being more positive and thinking more rationally and you may also want to consider therapy.
Melissa