Increasing Self-Esteem/Breaking out of patterns to establish healthier lifestyle
Hi! I've put a lot of thought recently into how our current existence is a summation of all the choices we've previously made in our life, and the path we have followed as a result of those choices. I've also been putting a lot of thought into how we've already established personal reactions to certain situations, and how we tend to react the same way (whether healthy for us or not) to the same circumstances, even though that reaction may not be in our best interests. I'm trying to make a conscious effort to break out of my pre-established reactionary patterns and choose new, healthier paths to follow. Part of my doing this is visualizing a given situation, how I normally react and what the outcome usually is/how I feel about it, and the outcome I would prefer to see and how I can react to achieve that outcome.
Do you have any suggestions on how I can STOP myself from instantly reacting to a given situation in a negative way, take a mental step back from the situation and take the time to choose a better, healthier path to follow? Or is this whole question too confusing?
Part of my desire to do this is to break a pre-established pattern of abuse that I grew up with under my mother - I want to be a much better mom for my children. And part of my desire to do this is to have a more loving relationship with my husband.
Thank-you for any help you can offer. I very much appreciate it. I really enjoy reading books, so if you have any book suggestions to offer I would be willing to try to locate and read the book(s). Thank-you!
Excellent concept. Another dimension to add is coming from non-mind. The Hindu philosophy states we need to learn to observe our mind. The way they suggested is quiten the mind and observe how thoughts come to you automatically. You are not your thoughts and you can learn about yourself from otside your mind :i.e from silence. It is futile to tame the mind. Maybe organize a bit here and there. The MInd wins every time. The Eastern schools of thought state surrender to silence, quiten the mind. Anyway good luck and keep me posted to firstname.lastname@example.org i'm in the same search path.