Increasing Self-Esteem/Sadness, ugliness


I am mad at myself, depressed, lonely. this may sound dumb but I feel off the wagon after making a thread on this weight lost website, most commenters were so mean I had to ask the moderators to delete my thread, Then I started to eat a lot and eating when I wasnt hungry.Gained 20 pounds back and now im so sad and I hate myself, I feel pathetic & miserable both mentally and psychically. I cant stop but thinking ill be better off dead, I know thats stupid to say that but I feel that way all of the time. I was crying and it took me like an hour to write this, what should I do? I want to lose weightagain very much and I have had negative consequences to my body, weight gain, feeling like crap, oily face, sadness. I really do hate myself and I feel hopeless.

Hi Dina,

Whatever the mind thinks the heart believes. Condition your mind to think only positive thoughts so that you will act on your beliefs.  Unfortunately, none of us can control what people say to us but we can control how what they say affects us.  Let those painful comments serve as a reminder to recondition your mind and use some conditioning techniques. Mind conditioning technique #1- Remember that one manís junk is another manís treasure. What someone does not like, another person will absolutely need and love.  Someone out there desperately need to hear what you have to say; Mind conditioning technique #2- Remember that itís impossible to please everyone all of the time.  So expect resistance from some but move on because not everything deserves your attention;  Mind conditioning technique #3- Remember that happiness is your responsibility so donít expect others to keep you happy; Mind conditioning technique #4- Choose NOT to allow society to define you. Furthermore, you donít have to agree with everyoneís opinion of you.  Instead, you define who you are and then teach the world how to treat you; Mind conditioning technique #5- Think and receive positive thoughts only.  Treat your mind as a filter, keep the positive thoughts and discard the junk messages.
The point is that mind conditioning, just like increasing self-esteem, is a never ending ongoing process. Simply because someone will always have a negative opinion about us and you canít control what people say.  Again, you are responsible for your own happiness.
And, honestly, losing weight is not at all easy which explains why you can find an article about weight loss in just about every magazine.  People are inspired by success stories!!
Take control of your life and your thoughts by conditioning your mind to think ONLY positive thoughts on a daily basis despite what people do or say to you.  Happiness begins with you and reflects onto those who need it.

Best wishes,

Ps., deleting the thread was an empowering and wonderful idea.  Keep up the good work and remember that someone somewhere needs to hear your words for encouragement.

Increasing Self-Esteem

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Brenda Douglas


It would be my pleasure to answer questions that will help you to love and celebrate your uniqueness as I have a passion for serving as a confidence coach and answering questions that will help you to live a victorious lifestyle without compromising high standards. Growing in confidence involves developing cognitively, physically, emotionally, socially, and professionally. Building your self-esteem is a lifelong commitment that takes diligent effort.


I am the Founder of Royalty which is an organization that empowers and refines women who are everyday leaders; through interactive workshops, seminars, and courses; a Confidence Coach, and the author of the Everyday Leaders blog at and Recognize Royalty at,

Royalty, Inc.


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