AboutAnil Expertise Indian culture could be a subject for a lifetime, but I can answer general questions regarding the Indian culture. I can answer questions relating to relationships, family, religion, and education in the context of the Indian culture.I have lived in the US for about 10 years and therefore can answer some cross-culture type questions.
Experience I was born and raised in India. I lived in India for about 25 years before I came to the US. I lived in the US for 10 years, but in those ten years, I had closed ties in India, so I am quite familiar with the Indian culture and the mainstream Indian society. I have always been fascinated by culture and diversity, so I can give a critical analysis of some of the cross cultural issues. I have conducted culture related training programs to educate visitors to India.
Indian husband kills (burns) his wife after marriage. Not for moral reasons, not because he learned something bad about her, not for dowry or financial reasons, not because of something she did. He planned to kill her even before the wedding. He has deep motive.HE IS NOT PUNISHED and marries another woman. How is this explained? The main issue is under what circumstances he burns his wife after the marriage. The whole thing is planned even before the wedding.In that case why he marries her in the first place? And he remains unpunished. The events are not publicised (we do not hear in the news).Dowry is not involved. What is it then? Please help."
Answer Hi Yiangos,
To say, "The whole thing is planned even before the wedding", presumes that we somehow have inside information and we know for sure that the wedding is going to be followed by a murder. However, if and when that does happen, it’s done by really sick, third rate, immoral, unethical and disgusting people. Instead of trying to analyze this sick nature of some individuals, we will examine the other issue here.
Generally what tends to happen is that there are cases where there a marriage, and then after a series of events, the wife is murdered. And the guy gets away quite easily. Even worst, he gets married again. So I will rephrase your question as, "Husband kills wife. He is not punished and marries another woman, how do you explain this?"
Based on what I have read on marriages, I am led to believe that the concept of marriages was invented to establish ownership rights on women. In the very old and uncivilized world, men fought (and sometimes killed each other) to have access to a woman. It was the law of jungle. The strongest and mightiest could have the woman of his choice. As societies progressed and people got more civilized the concept of marriage came into existence. More progressive and developed societies view the concept of marriage differently than the relatively backward societies. In the developed world, marriages tend to have more egalitarian values. These societies try not to different between the sexes when it comes to rights and privileges of a married couple. So much so that there is an increasing level of acceptance of same sex couples (as in marriage). That’s not true with the third world countries. The third world countries are not called third world purely for economic reasons. But also these countries have structured their societies and their concept of social justice. In a country such as India, the society is broken into few religions and several castes. The religion and caste determines where a person belongs in the social hierarchy, which in turn determines how the person would be treated by the rest of the society.
In general, men (in the Indian context) are protected by outdated laws and local patriarchal establishment. The patriarchal interpretation of traditions, customs, and religion are very liberal and forgiving towards men. But are very abusive, unfair, harshly discriminatory, and humiliating to women. Across the society, women are often vulnerable to physical, sexual, and mental abuse. And these women are conditioned to believe that nothing can be done about it. All this is very troubling and disturbing when one looks at the scene in the context of marriages. In case the husband dies soon after the wedding, in a weird and superstitious way the women he married to, is somehow held responsible for her husband's death. Therefore, she is exposed to some form of suffering for the remainder of her life. Very sad, but true.
Although the Government of India and many State Governments have passed some very stringent laws to protect women, the enforcement of these laws in the patriarchal society is very challenging.
I am hopeful that in time to come, with more legal rights to women, more women support groups being formed, more active role of governments, institutions, and international agencies, there is a hope for a better tomorrow. I am not predicting that the kind of behavior you mentioned will completely go away, but I am hopeful that the society will be less tolerant of people who commit such heinous crimes and would be severely punished. I am hopeful that people such as yourself will question the status quo and will not only demand change, but would be part of the solution.
