Interfaith Relationships/Muslim/Catholic deciding whether to marry or not
Ali wrote at 2011-07-07 14:54:56
I would also like to comment on this issue because I'm in the same situation. I'm a Muslim and my girlfriend is Catholic/Atheist.
She believes in a higher being and does not believe in Jesus being God himself. She also believes that religion is often times conflicting and is pointless.
In regards to your question of marriage and kids, simply put - your marriage is a compromise of self to form a union. In order for the both of you to be truly happy, you have to compromise so that there is a commonality between you two. Think of a ven-diagram with a shared common oval. The two of you need to respect each others faith by letting the kids decide for themselves. The easiest way to settle this without favoring one party (either you or your potential husband) is to let the kids grow up experiencing both religions.
In my situation, it is religious customs to have the kid born a Muslim because they take after their father. The prayer in the ear blessing you've mentioned seems fictious but I may be wrong as well. As the previous commenter stated, you have to let the kids decide for themselves and they cant be forced into a religion.
My girlfriend is choosing not to convert because my parents dislike her and she feels that religion is not necessary to be a good person and that is all that matters.
Ultimately, compromise by sharing your religious backgrounds. Dont have the baby baptized and dont favor Islam. Teach the kid all religions and let them decide.
Sadie wrote at 2011-11-21 04:09:27
I just wanted to add my from my personal experience.
My husband is Muslim and I am Catholic. My father also is extremely religious Catholic and we ended up baptizing the children Catholic. My husband insists the children are Muslim, even though they are quite young, but the truth according to Christianity is that once they are baptized, they are considered Christian. Therefore, when people ask what their religion is, I openly say, well, they raised learning about not just Christianity, and Islam, but all religions. In the end when the children grow up they will choose what they believe. I have no problem if they decide to be Muslims or Hindu or Christian or Anything as long as they have respect for others. My husband, while he prefers they are Muslim, will undoubtedly prefer they say they are Muslim, but I think he even knows it will be up to them when they are older. So we are not pressuring them, but enlightening them slowly with age, and careful not to say anything to bash each others religions. I strongly believe, if you do not want to raise your child Muslim, you do NOT marry your boyfriend. It will not be fun, trust me. If he is not open to raising them with both, then it is better not to enter into in if you are intent on raising them Catholic. I believe if you can agree to raise them with both, it is the most fair, however it will be a big sacrifice for you, and a big one for him to raise them in just one religion (either Catholic or Muslim). Good luck. Don't worry, it will work out. Follow your gut instinct.
Jane wrote at 2012-11-29 02:15:15
I know I am reacting nearly 3 years later... but just wondering if you are still in the interfaith relationship or perhaps a marriage now? Because I am (married and have children) and I think it would be nice to have a group where we could share and discuss things? At the moment I am part of a UK group and I have to say it does make a difference when you have people to share with.
Kim in Gran Couva wrote at 2013-01-14 14:37:54
My Catholic daughter is married to a Muslim man and although before he was born she said that baby would be raised Muslim by Dad, she agreed to baptise him. She's changed her mind and i am bereft about her not standing for the faith she professes and granting the same to her child. We have asked nothing of her except this and cant reconcile with her lack of faith.