About Jasmine Desdune Expertise I can answer all questions you have. Whether you are confused or just need some
reassurance. I am here to help, with open ears and heart. My experiance however, is in black white relationships.
Experience I am a black woman, who has been in many interracial relationships with a white man.
Education/Credentials I am 22, so I am in my 4th year of college/
Question Hi. I am a Black 17 year old female in high school. Normally, one would assume that the White father may be the bigot in a racial scenario, but actually its the other way around. Its my father. Black racists are just as bad If not worse.
My father is a very militant, strict person in personality, but is lenient when it comes to me dating surprisingly-as long as the guy is Black. My dad was raised around my grandfather who was a Black nationalists and part of the Black panther party and he certainly does not like White people at all! My mom is not living, and I love my father, but I don't respect his wishes that I ONLY be able to date White guys. Its not fair for me to have to be limited when my school and neighborhood is so diverse.
I met my Boyfriend (White) when I was a freshman and we were good friends. I didn't initially even think about dating him. I wouldn't say I was opposed to it; it just never seemed to cross my conscious mind. But things changed. From the time he first kissed me at the beginning of our senior year, I let him know that it probably wouldn't be a good Idea and I told him exactly why, but as time passed and we started to hit it off, all of that changed. I had to constantly sneak to see him without my father knowing. And after a while, we were involved sexually.
One evening we were doing a project outside my house when he kissed me just as my father pulled up. (he had no problem with us talking as long as we didn't date) HE FLIPPED OUT! He started screaming at him and me, pushed him, and condemned me never to speak to him again. I felt to embarrassed and hurt! I had never seen my father that angry and I am very afraid of him when he gets the way. With him temper, I honestly feel he Is capable of hurting me If he found out we were still seeing each other.
He didn't, but now I am 1 and a half months pregnant by my BF and I don't know what to do. I feel like I have no one to talk to in my family and If I tell my father, he will probably freak out on me. I feel like my only option is an Abortion. I talked to his mom and she said it would be best also "for the child not to be confused". She said she will even pay for it and never tell my dad. My BF on top of that says even if I do get one, he still wants to be with me. He is neutral on my decision. I don't know how to deal with this and even if I do get it, do I still want to deal with the drama of an interracial relationship? I mean people at school already stare, but if my stomach gets bigger, they are going to stare worse!
I really don't want to kill my child but I'm so scared and his mom says I should. She said she will sign the papers (and in my state any adult is legal enough). It offers a very peaceful worry free solution seemly.
Doesn't it? What should I do?
Sincerely
AndGrowing…
Answer And Growing,
I have been thinking about your question with your pregnancy dilema, and for months you have been on my mind, ive been wondering what your decision was and how everything worked out. I just wanted to talk to you to see how you are with your boyfriend and everything because you and your boyfriend sounded great together. If you feel comfortable could you please just give me an email or you could do a followup to this, but an email might be more private. my email address is kingdomheart728@yahoo.com
