Expert: Melissa Burton (a.k.a Bee) - 12/14/2007

Question
Hi, I'm a young woman from New Zealand and I would like to know a bit about the Indian culture in regards to relationships. About 8 months ago i broke up with my Indian boyfriend of one year because of his controlling, clingy and sometimes angry behaviour. I knew his parents didn't approve of me because i wasn't the same race. I was wondering if his controlling behaviour had anything to do with his Indian culture (his parents are very traditional?), and are all Indian men taught to act like this?

Answer
Hello
Well I think your boyfriend was probably controlling because of the influence of his parenting. There may have been other external factors but it was probably mostly due to his parenting. About Indian culture... yes the more traditional parents.... the more likely they would want that man to be controlling. Not all parents are like that though. Some people are becoming more modern about these things so it's not everyone... just most at this point... but that is changing a lot. Anyway good luck with this, and I'm very sorry to hear about your boyfriend. It sounds like a very terrible situation to be in.
Melissa