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Interspecies Conflict/Mudwrestling or Fingerpainting?


So if bears could wrangle up handfuls of their own feces and sling it around as primates tend to do, who would win in a hypothetical "processed food" fight between the two species? I eagerly await your detailed expert opinion. Thank you.

Hello Eduardo.

Interesting question.  I'm assuming you mean a "processed food" fight between bears and primates, so I will proceed as if that's the case.  Monkeys and apes are known to throw poop at times (perhaps for defense or to convey a particular feeling) and therefore have the edge over ursids in skill, accuracy, etc. because bears don't engage in this type of behavior.  A primate's ability to grasp with their hands is also a clear advantage.  Many bears have large paws that would be capable of throwing a larger volume of "processed food" at an opponent if the inclination existed (as suggested in this hypothetical), but the accuracy of the launched substance would be poor at best.  It would probably be like an individual with a paint-ball gun squaring off against an individual with an old medieval catapult.

If the combatants in this scenario elected to forgo the "processed food" portion of the battle and resort to old-fashioned "fisticuffs" instead, only the gorilla would have a good chance to prevail against the smallest of the bears.

I hope that answered your question!

Best regards.

Interspecies Conflict

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Questions regarding animal conflicts within realistic or unrealistic settings are welcome; my strength lies in medium-to-large species. Small animals (including birds of prey), prehistoric animals, sea creatures, and domestic dog breeds are usually within my scope, but to a lesser degree. I can't confidently answer hypothetical questions about human vs animal, arachnids, insects, or amphibians, but I am willing to field them nonetheless.


From a young age, I have been interested in animals. Starting with the original Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom and World Book Encyclopedias, I have seen many animal shows and documentaries and have read multiple books on the subject. I have a solid understanding of the physiology of many animals and interspecies conflict in general.

Associate degree in unrelated field; biology classes in college.

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