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Asak,

I'm a muslim man, 25 years old. I like a Christian girl and would like to get married to her. She is ready to accept Islam (if she has to) and lead life as a wife the Islamic way (Hijaab.. etc).

I understand that Surah Ma'idah allows a muslim man to marry a chaste christian. But I have a list of questions I would like to get clarified:

1) Is it necessary/better if she accepts Islam before marriage?

2) Is it necessary for all her family members to accept Islam before marriage?

3) Since any relationship before marriage is haraam, is it best to get married soon and repent for the sins together OR end this relationship altogether? Would I be committing a sin if I dont marry her because I dont know if she will accept Islam then.

4) What are the pre requisites for this marriage to be valid? Who can be a wali for her (since there is no Muslim man in her family).

5) What if my parents/relatives do not approve of this marriage (solely based on the fact that she is a christian and the society will talk ill of us)? They do not know yet but I wish to make them aware of this as soon as possible. What is the right thing to do? What rights do parents/relatives have over my decision of marrying someone? (Although I cannot think of going against my parents will. May Allah guide us the right way).

6) What are the things the girl should be made aware of before marriage? ( Like example, telling her that the children will follow Islam ONLY and will not participate/learn/follow any other religion).

7) Is her family welcome to our home after marriage? Are they considered and respected the same way as a mother/sister-in-law (had this been a marriage with a Muslim woman)?



Your answers will be appreciated. Thank you.



May Allah bless us and guide us to the right path.

Answer
1) Is it necessary/better if she accepts Islam before marriage? NO

2) Is it necessary for all her family members to accept Islam before marriage? NO

3) Since any relationship before marriage is haraam, is it best to get married soon and repent for the sins together OR end this relationship altogether? Would I be committing a sin if I dont marry her because I dont know if she will accept Islam then. YOU SHOULD MARRY HER AND MARRY HER AS YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH HER AND MARRYING A CHRISTIAN WOMAN IS ALLOWED.

4) What are the pre requisites for this marriage to be valid? Who can be a wali for her (since there is no Muslim man in her family). JUST YOUR CONSENT - NO NED FOR HER WALI.
ITS BOTH YOUR CHOICE - SEE VERSE SAYS YOUR CHOICE- 1) Is it necessary/better if she accepts Islam before marriage?

2) Is it necessary for all her family members to accept Islam before marriage? NO

3) Since any relationship before marriage is haraam, is it best to get married soon and repent for the sins together OR end this relationship altogether? Would I be committing a sin if I dont marry her because I dont know if she will accept Islam then. NO

4) What are the pre requisites for this marriage to be valid? JUST BEING SANE ADULT AND CONSENT Who can be a wali for her (since there is no Muslim man in her family).NO NEED

5) What if my parents/relatives do not approve of this marriage (solely based on the fact that she is a christian and the society will talk ill of us)? YOUR CHOICE NOT PARENTS.
They do not know yet but I wish to make them aware of this as soon as possible. What is the right thing to do? What rights do parents/relatives have over my decision of marrying someone? (Although I cannot think of going against my parents will. May Allah guide us the right way).

6) What are the things the girl should be made aware of before marriage? ( Like example, telling her that the children will follow Islam ONLY and will not participate/learn/follow any other religion). RESPECT.

7) Is her family welcome to our home after marriage? Are they considered and respected the same way as a mother/sister-in-law (had this been a marriage with a Muslim woman)? ALLOWED.

5) What if my parents/relatives do not approve of this marriage (solely based on the fact that she is a christian and the society will talk ill of us)? They do not know yet but I wish to make them aware of this as soon as possible. What is the right thing to do? What rights do parents/relatives have over my decision of marrying someone? (Although I cannot think of going against my parents will. May Allah guide us the right way). ITS YOUR CHOICE.

6) What are the things the girl should be made aware of before marriage? ( Like example, telling her that the children will follow Islam ONLY and will not participate/learn/follow any other religion). SHE MUST RESPECT YOU AND SHE MUST BE TREATED WITH RESPECT.

7) Is her family welcome to our home after marriage? Are they considered and respected the same way as a mother/sister-in-law (had this been a marriage with a Muslim woman)? SAME LIKE YOUR FAMILY AND MUST BE TREATED WITH RESPECT AND ALLOWED TO VISIT.

4:3 If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.

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Imam Habeeb

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Being an Educator of Islamic Studies and Interfaith discussions for the past 25 years and having authored seventeen books and numerous articles on Islam - I think I can answer questions on Islam and other religions and issues of the Hanafi jurisprudence as well as general questions on Quran and Sharia. Love, sex and marital problems are some such topics! This is an independent volunteering service and not under any organizational banner that I may be affiliated with. My book- Intimacy and the Sacred talks about Sex and Muslims. http://www.iuniverse.com/Bookstore/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=SKU-000463374

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