Islam/DO I HAVE TO PERFORM IDDAT AGAIN?
As salamu alaikum,
I just found out today 18th February, 2013 that my (ex-) husband had divorced me since on 16th November, 2012. He informed me today and added so I can calculate my idda, although it has been over four (4) months and 4 menstrual cycles. Infact, I am currently on my fourth cycle. Technically I have ended my idda, but I didn't even know I was on it. He was even discussing reconciling with an uncle of mine (although I have been against their various meetings, since I was the one seeking the end of the marriage due to his abuse to mention a few) and now he's saying he did it 4 months ago. To be honest, I was grateful I didn't have to begin my idda today. Although, I am not 100% sure I am right, with regards to Islamic law.
1) My question is, am I right that my idda is complete even though I didn't know I was on it or do I have to begin my idda today, the day I found out about the divorce? Kindly adjust your response to the day you get back to me, in case I do have to re-do my idda.
2) Please advice me on how to properly perform my idda. I was out of the country from 16th November, 2012 until 29th December, 2012 and from the airport I went straight to my parents house (since they knew about my decision) and have been there since then.
I pray Allah reward you for your contributions. Amin.
Bismillahir-Rahmanir-Rahim (In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful)
Sorry to learn about your divorce. May Allah grant you a better husband.
1. Its best to start your idda from the day you have learnt about the divorce. ( to be free from any guilt or controversy or error)
[Quran 2:228] Divorced women shall wait concerning themselves for three monthly periods. Nor is it lawful for them to hide what Allah (God) Hath created in their wombs, if they have faith in Allah (God) and the Last Day. And their husbands have the better right to take the m back in that period, if they wish for reconciliation. And women shall have rights similar to the rights against them, according to what is equitable; but men have a degree (of advantage) over them. And Allah (God) is Exalted in Power, Wise.
[Quran 33:49] O you who believe! When you marry believing women, and then divorce them before you have touched them, no period of 'Iddat have you to count in respect of them: so give them a present. And set them free in a handsome manner.
[Quran 65:4] Such of your women as have passed the age of monthly courses, for them the prescribed period, if you have any doubts, is three months, and for those who have no courses (it is the same): for those who carry (life within their wombs), their perio d is until they deliver their burdens: and for those who fear Allah (God), He will make their path easy.
[Baqara 2:234] If any of you die and leave widows behind, they shall wait concerning themselves four months and ten days: When they have fulfilled their term, there is no blame on you if they dispose of themselves in a just and reasonable manner. And Allah/God is well acquainted with what you do.
Bukhari Volumn 007, Book 063, Hadith Number 254.
Narated By Um 'Atiyya : We were forbidden to mourn for more than three days for a dead person, except for a husband, for whom a wife should mourn for four months and ten days (while in the mourning period) we were not allowed to put kohl in our eyes, nor perfume our-selves, nor wear dyed clothes, except a garment of 'Asb (special clothes made in Yemen). But it was permissible for us that when one of us became clean from her menses and took a bath, she could use a piece of a certain kind of incense. And it was forbidden for us to follow funeral processions.
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If you are not convinced or feel the answer did not address all your questions, pls write back immediately without any hesitation. Please do forgive me if there is an unexpected delay in replying.
Pls spare some time and see these small video clips.
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( Note: I am not a mufti, if you are in doubt or want 100% accuracy please verify the above hadith with an authentic personality. However I have not altered any hadith and presented it as and how it was found. May Allah forgive our mistakes from time to time...ameen.)