AboutTai Yamanaka Expertise I can answer questions regarding Japanese business culture, business etiquette, corporate society, as well as provide know-how on how to research industries, corporations and communicate with business contacts.
Experience I have over 20 years of experience working in Japanese corporations as well as for American corporations doing business with Japan. I have served as a representative as well as a go-between for American and other corporations with Japanese businesses, industry and scholarly associations as well as government agencies
Question Over 20 years ago we hosted a Japanese exchange student. Today I received a check (large amt) from her family. I am very perplexed as to why and what to do with it. Please advise
Thank you.
Answer Hello Michelle,
Thank you for your question.
The problem seems to lie with her family, rather than with Japanese culture. The reason for this is that I was perplexed also on reading your question.
In Japan, we do indeed have a custom of presenting gifts, including money, in appreciation or in congratulations or at leave-taking. There may even be less resistance to giving or receiving money. However, such gifts of money are never done without a good reason.
The exchange student’s family probably only wanted to express their thanks to you. 20 years ago, you were a wonderful host, and you taught the student the importance of understanding the differences between cultures and the warmth of human kindness. That great experience was a gift to the student, and by so valuing the memory of that time, her family wanted to express their gratitude.
I would have been happier receiving just a letter of appreciation and such a letter might have been more meaningful, but if you are still continuing to host foreign students, perhaps they wanted you to use that money to fund your activities?
How about writing frankly to the student that you were perplexed by the check, and that you have no reason for receiving such a gift. With the variety of cultures and people the student has experienced, she should be able to understand the way you feel.
