Jehovah`s Witness/feeling used


QUESTION: Hello Sir, I came to you with my question because you seem less disturbed than some of the other Jw's on this site. My question to you is, Are JW's taught to avoid non witness folks even if they are family? I have experienced a situation that has me feeling different emotions right now. I have a nephew that converted over to JW when he was very young and in love. Now, years later, much has changed. He is still a JW, but not a happy one. He goes along with whatever his wife says on pretty much every subject. He is quiet and withdrawn now. They have had past financial struggles and we have always helped them out. What I have noticed, is their lack of empathy for us, or any of our other non witness family members. They do not attempt to call or visit any of us, but choose to spend an enormous amount of time with other Witnesses. Their children have no relationship with their non witness cousins(that are the same age)but seem to have very close relationships with other witnesses who are not even of their age group. Our family finds this very odd and frankly, quite hurtful. We (our family) have always been welcoming and gracious, and have never passed judgement on them for their religious choice. The part that really has annoyed us is they manage to "visit" when there is financial help for them. My husband recently had knee and hip surgery and spent a great deal of time recovering at home. We live very close to my nephew, and yet they never bothered to call or visit to see how my husband was doing. They have politely declined invitations from our side of the family, in favor of a witness get together. Their excuse to us is "They are too busy", yet they find the time to socialize with their witness friends often. We do not understand this type of behavior. We may not be JW's, but we are good and kind people. Their obvious avoidance of us has become unacceptable, and we will probabaly cut off any further financial help in the future. How can people who claim to follow the Bible treat others in such a harsh and disrespectful manner? If this is what your religion encourages, then you all have been greatly mislead as to what God expects of us. We are just extremely disappointed in them and feel used. Thank you for listening.

ANSWER: Hello Rita,

Thank you for your question. I hope I can provide you with a balanced response.

I can understand how you are feeling. Family is such a big part of many peoples lives and when family members act in a way that is contrary to what is generally expected it hurts.  I grew up as a JW and have many cousins that are not JWs.  When I was a child  we used to visit each other.   When I grew older I lost contact with many of my cousins but I still phone uncles and aunts occasionally.  This is not done very often because we find we have little in common any more.

From what you have said it sounds like your nephew and his wife are not applying in their lives Bible principles.   Neither husband or wife should be dominant.  We are taught that a husband and wife are a partnership and that the final say on matters should be that of the husband.  If your nephew  “goes along with whatever his wife says on pretty much every subject ” there is something wrong.   

The best way to understand  how we feel about families is to read some material on it.  The following links will give you information.  Take your time to look for articles that may show you how we view family life

The following  link is to the library.  It may be helpful to look at some of the material from the book “How To Make Your Family Life Happy.” which comes up on the right hand side of the screen If you click on that you will be in chapter 14.  To see what other subjects are covered in that book, on the left had side there are arrows one pointing to the left the other to the right, these will show the other chapters.[]=bk&p=par

The above links deal mainly with immediate family life and are not really of use when it comes to extended family especially non Witness families.

If your nephews only real contact with you is when he and his family are in financial need, that is not something we would like to see.  We are not taught to use other people.  Using other people is not a Christian value.  Perhaps he / they need some advice on how to mange their finances. I gather that you are good at finances.  Instead of giving them money  see if they need help budgeting.   We are taught not to have a love for money, and to spend what we do have wisely. Seeing you feel he / they are using you then you should say something to them.  It is not something you should put up with.   

You say  - “ He is quiet and withdrawn now. “ -  May I suggest that you mention to him that you have noticed a change in him, that he seems to be quite and withdrawn.  

A principle that we are taught is stated at Philippians 4:5 “Let YOUR reasonableness become known to all men. “  A reasonable action for your nephew would have been to show  concern for your husband, especially since you have been so generous with him financially, when he was recovering from that operation. For me, that is inexcusable on his part not to have shown concern.

Even though we get ample information to help us survive in this world, it is an unfortunate truth that many JWs do not follow the advice that is given.  On the web site just above this, if, in the search box,  you put  “budgeting”  you will find a lot of articles that we have been given to help us do that.

So if you think that they are having difficulties with budgeting, tactfully suggest that they follow the advice of their own religion. Perhaps even pointing them to what has been printed.  There is ample opportunity for you to use their own material to set them straight

NOW back to your question “Are JW's taught to avoid non witness folks even if they are family? “

You are no doubt aware that we do not celebrate birthdays, Christmas, Easter, Halloween, St Valentines day and national  holidays such as (in the case of the USA)  Thanksgiving, July 4 , Ground-hog day etc etc.  By abstaining from such celebrations (which we view as being against Bible principles) means that we have a lot less in common with  non JW relatives. Those celebration are a big part of the lives of most people and we do not share that connection.

The best way for me to answer that is to let the Bible speak.  We hold the Bible as being of the most importance. Our objective in life is to do the best we can in living up to the principles found in the Bible.  We understand that the principles in the Bible are for the best way of life. This text from the Revised Standard Version  (not our NWT) may seem very harsh when you read it in this context, it is dealing with all the things we see as unscriptural such as the things I mentioned in the last paragraph as well as all the other doctrines of worship we believe to be God dishonoring such as the trinity, hell-fire, immortal soul, etc

2 Corinthians 6:14- 7:1 “ 14  Do not be mismated with unbelievers. For what partnership have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? 16  What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will live in them and move among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 17  Therefore come out from them, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch nothing unclean; then I will welcome you, 18  and I will be a father to you, and you shall be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."
7   1   Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, and make holiness perfect in the fear of God.”

This part of that text is often so true "Or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Finding common ground is often very difficult.

There was an occasion when Jesus was busy teaching and his family were wanting to speak to him.  This is recorded at Matthew 12:46-50   I will quote the King James Bible  “46   While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him. 47  Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee. 48  But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren? 49  And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! 50  For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.”

We understand the principle being taught here is, that those that have the same belief system as we do, are our family.  A non JW Bible commentary “Barnes Commentary” has this to say about Jesus words “Who is my mother?”  -

“There was no want of affection or respect in Jesus towards his mother , as is proved by his whole life. See especially Lu 2:51 Joh 19:25-27  . This question was asked merely to fix the attention of the hearers, and to prepare them for the answer; that is, to show them who sustained towards him the nearest and most tender relation. To do this he pointed to his disciples: Dear and tender as were the ties which bound him to his mother and brethren , yet those which bound him to his disciples were more tender and sacred. How great was his love for his disciples, when it was more than even that for his mother! And what a bright illustration of his own doctrine, that we ought to forsake father, and mother, and friends, and houses, and lands, to be his followers. (underline mine)

End quote

The texts mentioned  in that quote  show that Jesus had great respect for his mother.  The account in John shows he wanted her looked after when he died

Lu 2:51  "And he went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them; and his mother kept all these things in her heart."

Joh 19:25 -27 "So the soldiers did this. But standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother, and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26  When Jesus saw his mother, and the disciple whom he loved standing near, he said to his mother, "Woman, behold, your son!" 27  Then he said to the disciple, "Behold, your mother!" And from that hour the disciple took her to his own home.”

At that time the brothers of Jesus were not believers or his followers.  Jesus wanted to make sure his mother was looked after.

Because of that text mentioned above (2 Corinthians 6:14- 7:1 ) we do tend to limit our association with non JWs.  However even thou it is limited we are not to fully ignore family either.   Limiting association can help prevent embarrassing situations of being present at one of the celebrations mentioned earlier and not participating in  them.  It can be embarrassing for the non JW family member to have a JW present that will not engage in say singing carols or happy birthday.  Attending a wedding of a non JW can also cause embarrassment for non  relatives.  If the wedding service was  of a religious nature, any   religious customs where those witnessing the occasion might be asked to participate in, say for example singing a hymn,  the JW would not do it. To avoid compromising what we see as Christian principles and being a cause of embarrassment to relatives most JWs would not attend a religious wedding ceremony.  A JW generally would have no problems attending a civil wedding ceremony.  At a wedding reception when “toasts” are made a JW would not participate in.  

That does not excuse a JW from showing due honour to relatives at any other time just as Jesus showed respect for his family.   The brothers of Jesus did not believe that he was the Messiah yet they respected him and his disciples.  We have recorded in the Bible book of John   Jesus having a conversation with his brothers about attending one of the festivals that he Jews had. ( see John 1:1-15 )  So Jesus showed his family the due respect that was due them. Finally I would like to just point to one more text 1 Peter 2: 16,17    “16  Live as free men, yet without using your freedom as a pretext for evil; but live as servants of God. 17 Honor all men.

The hard part for many JW's  to do, is find a balance between showing honor to family members and at the same time not compromising what we see as key Christian principles.

The life of a practising JW is a busy one.  We have two meetings that we strive to attend each week. Our meetings involve active participation and time is spent preparing for them  as families, so that we can participate. Part of our worship is the door to door ministry.  There is no set requirement as to how much time is spent doing so, that is up to each individual.  When they say “"They are too busy",  they probably are.

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QUESTION: Thank you for your quick response. I do understand that today everybody is busy, not just Jw's. People of other faiths spend time doing church activities and volunteer work that keep them just as busy. It is very apparent that the spare time they do have is spent with other Witnesses. You mention holidays, and I sense that Jw's put way too much emphasis and importance on these days that are really just a few days out of the year. We would welcome them any day. In fact, they have been invited many many times on non holiday occasions. It is very obvious that they purposely keep their children from associating with their cousins. I fear that the scriptures you mention may be greatly misinterpreted. We do expect any kind of "honor" as you mention, we just would like to be treated the same as their witness friends. The so called "principles" that you are taught sound a lot like bigotry and discrimination. We are all Gods children and Gods loves ALL his children, not just certain ones that are part of a particular man made religious group. I can understand refraining from associating with folks that are less than morally desirable, but I can assure you that is not our family. You and I both know that we are excluded because we are not of the same faith. Again, sounds more like bigotry and discrimination to me. You can excuse try to excuse it away, but that is the truth, the real truth. You know it. I know now that we will always be on the outside, and that is so sad. It is even more sad that that people are taught that Gods approves of this behavior and how it hurts others. It is wrong on so many levels. May you too find the truth, because I am sure this is not it. Thanks for your time.

ANSWER: Hello again Rita

I appreciate that what I said is not what you wanted to hear.  

When I mentioned “honor” it was not the elevating of a person but the honor of showing respect.  I just used the words of the 1 Peter 2: 16,17 The Greek word that is rendered Honor in English has included in its the meaning “to put a value “  Christians are admonished, then to value every one.  Your nephew should have shown your husband the respect  or the value that is due him seeing your nephew has used you for a source of finance.  I hope he keeps in mind these words “ Do not YOU people be owing anybody a single thing, except to love one another; for he that loves his fellowman has fulfilled [the] law.”  (Romans 13:8) – the capital YOU there is showing plural or many people.

The Greeks had several words for love. The word rendered “love” in the above text means an act based on principle, doing something for  the welfare of those people.  We are under obligation to show principled love to  our fellow man.

When I mentioned the holiday celebrations, and problems that can arise from weddings etc.,  that was to show that our belief systems are quite different  and that JWs so finding  common  ground is often very difficult.  Our desire is to obey God, for us that is what being a Christian means, doing the will of God.  

You do have a concern and you voiced a fear you do have as in the following.

“I fear that the scriptures you mention may be greatly misinterpreted. “

I am going to assume you were referring to the text I quoted from in 2 Corinthians 6:14- 7:1   which says in part  “ 14  Do not be mismated with unbelievers. For what partnership have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? “

About that text I said  “ Because of that text mentioned above (2 Corinthians 6:14- 7:1 ) we do tend to limit our association with non JWs.”

I would like to quote from a couple of non JW commentaries, these commentaries are from the 18th and 19th centuries and the language is old fashioned. They come from a time when the churches were not as liberal as they are today.  The commentators use the word heathens rest asured we are not called people who are not JWs heathens.   The first is from Albert Barnes, a  Presbyterian  theologian.

Ver. 14. Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers. This is closely connected in sense with the previous verse. The apostle is there stating the nature of the remuneration or recompense which he asks for all the love which he had shown to them, He here says, that one mode of remuneration would be to yield obedience to his commands, and to separate themselves from all improper alliance with unbelievers. “Make me this return for my love. Love me also; and as a proof of your affection, be not improperly united with unbelievers. Listen to me as a father addressing his children, and secure your own happiness and piety by not being unequally yoked with those who are not Christians.” The word which is here used (ετεροζυγεω) means, properly, to bear a different yoke, to be yoked heterogeneously.—Robinson, (Lex.) It is applied to the custom of yoking animals of different kinds together, (Passow;) and as used here means not to mingle together, or be united with unbelievers. It is implied in the use of the word that there is a dissimilarity between believers and unbelievers so great, that it is as improper for them to mingle together as it is to yoke animals of different kinds and species. The ground of the injunction is, that there is a difference between Christians and those who are not so great as to render such unions improper and injurious. The direction here refers, doubtless, to all kinds of improper connexions with those who were unbelievers. It has been usually supposed by commentators to refer particularly to marriage. But there is no reason for confining it to marriage. It doubtless includes that; but it may as well refer to any other intimate connexion, or to intimate friendships, or to participation in their amusements and employments, as to marriage . The radical idea is, that they were to abstain from all connexions with unbelievers—with infidels, and heathens, and those who were not Christians—which would identify them with them; or they were to have no connexion with them in anything as unbelievers, heathens, or infidels; they were to partake with them in nothing that was peculiar to them as such. They were to have no part with them in their heathenism, unbelief, and idolatry, and infidelity; they were not to be united with them in any way or sense where it would necessarily be understood that they were partakers with them in those things. This is evidently the principle here laid down, and this principle is as applicable now as it was then. In the remainder of this verse and the following verses, {#2Co 6:15,16} he states reasons why they should have no such intercourse. There is no principle of is as applicable now as it was then. In the remainder of this verse and the following verses, {#2Co 6:15,16} he states reasons why they should have no such intercourse.  There is no principle of Christianity that is more important than that which is here stated by the apostle; and none in which Christians are more in danger of erring, or in which they have more difficulty in determining the exact rule which they are to follow . The questions which arise are very important. Are we to have no intercourse with the people of the world? Are we cut loose from all our friends who are not Christians? Are we to become monks, and live a recluse and unsocial life? Are we never to mingle with the people of the world in business, in innocent recreation, or in the duties of citizens, and as neighbours and friends? It is important, therefore, in the highest degree, to endeavour to ascertain what are the principles on which the New Testament requires us to act in this matter.   (Underlining mine)  
end quote

Another Presbyterian Charles Hodge  says

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

After the exhortation to requite his love by loving him, he exhorts them to keep aloof from all intimate association with the evil. The exhortation is general, and is not to be confined to partaking of heathen sacrifices, nor to intermarriage with the heathen, much less to association with the opponents of the apostle. It no doubt had a special reference or application to the peculiar circumstances of the Corinthians, and was intended to guard them against those entangling and dangerous associations with the unconverted around them, to which they were specially exposed. And as we know that their special danger was from idolaters, (see #1Co 8, and #1Co 10:14-33) whose festivals they were constantly urged to attend, it is to be presumed that it was from all association with the heathen in their worship that the apostle intended to warn them. But this is only one application of the principle here laid down, viz., that intimate associations ought not to be formed by the people of God with those who are not his people. The same remark may be made in reference to the persons here intended by unbelievers. It is no doubt true that by unbelievers (οι απιστοι) Paul meant the heathen. {See #1Co 6:6} But it does not follow from this that intimate association with the heathen is all that is here forbidden. The principle applies to all the enemies of God and children of darkness. It is intimate, voluntary association with the wicked that is forbidden.

End quote

I appreciate that what I said is not what you wanted to hear.  But for us, we worship a God that the majority of Christian Churches do not worship.  Most Christians worship Jesus as God.  We do not.  We worship the same God Jesus worshiped, the God of the ancient Israelites, Jehovah.    

Now we no that we have to have association with people that are not JWs.  It is impossible not to.  The advice give to the first century Christians that we follow is to keep our association with non JWs to a minimum.  This may sound strange to you, our understanding of the council given to those 1st century Christians is clear.  Many of the first century Christians were Jews.  The Jews claimed to worship Jehovah, but they had turned away from him.  We see those that posses to be Christian but worshiping Jesus as a kin to the Jews of Jesus day.  The followers of Christ were to told to keep association to a minimum.

The bottom line is, we take the Bible extremely serious, and the texts that I mentioned are the way of a Christian.  It is a shame you see it as bigotry.  The dictionary defines bigotry as “stubborn and complete intolerance of any creed, belief, or opinion that differs from one's own”. We are not intolerant of the beliefs of other people. Every one is free to live the way they want to live. Our way if life is based on Gods word the Bible. Our view is the same as Gods  as recorded in  Acts 10:34 “For a certainty I perceive that God is not partial.”   there is caveat to that though.  The text goes on to say “but in every nation the man that fears him and works righteousness is acceptable to him”. National barriers are not a problem just as different ideologies are not a problem

It is true that Jesus spent time with all sorts of people.  The religious leaders of his day frowned upon his eating with the tax collectors and sinners.    Jesus spent time with all sorts of people. His mission was to do the will of his God and Father in teaching what God required of us. Later the Apostle Paul said    “.. God, 4 whose will is that all sorts of men should be saved and come to an accurate knowledge of truth” (1 Timothy 2: 4 )   God  “does not desire any to be destroyed but desires all to attain to repentance” (2 Peter 5:26 )

It is not our desire to hurt the feelings of our relatives. Just to repeat what I said in the first reply The hard part for many JW's  to do, is find a balance between showing honor to family members and at the same time not compromising what we see as key Christian principles.

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QUESTION: Hello Brenton, Thank you for getting back to me. I read your whole response, and I have to say, it truly saddened me. I know you probably will not understand what I mean, and I certainly mean no disrespect, but I will try to explain. First off, you explain basic terminology to me as if I were stupid, and do not know the meaning of words like honor, respect, and love. It was, to say the least, insulting. I did not need a "lesson" from you. I can only conclude that this is how you are taught to address non JW's. Fyi, not a good move. People do appreciate being "talked to". I felt most of your response was not sincere and heartfelt, but scripted. This approach made me uneasy, and raised many red flags. You mention your "belief system" being "very different", and therefore it is hard to find "common ground" with others. That statement almost made me cry. I noticed you also refrained from saying "the truth" and instead chose "belief system". I must say, that was very surprising to me, that you would choose those words. You are spot on with that comment. It is just that, a belief system. A system created by man, not God. I can only say that I feel such sorrow for you and my nephew, that you have been taught that this is how a christian is to behave. It is not. No wonder my nephew is so depressed. It must be so difficult to follow the teachings of your organization,and yet know deep down it is not right, no matter how one may "explain" what a certain scripture means.  How does one "spread the good news" and then "snub" the very people they approach? To me, it mimics a over zealous sales person turning on the charm to sell you something, then when you politely decline, that sales person is not so charming and nice anymore. Why would anyone choose to be part of a organization that really does not want to have anything to do with you if you reject them? I believe a gross misinterpretation of the Bible has been taught to you. Again, I can only feel sorrow and pity for you. I know this is not what you want to hear, and will not agree, but this is what I see from a more objective point of view. This explains a lot about my nephews demeanor. Heartfelt prayers for you both. I know you are a kind and well meaning person. Thank you for your time.

Hello again Rita

I apologise for making you seem “stupid” as you said by explaining the meaning of the honor.  I did so because you had said  --  “We do expect any kind of "honor" as you mention, we just would like to be treated the same as their witness friends. ”  --   I understood what you were saying there, is,  that your view of honor was something more than being treated as friends.  I, unfortunately, assumed that you  saw the word “honor” in light of, say,  holding someone in high esteem, or to revere.  The reason for the explanation was to show that  I was not saying your nephew should revere you but that your nephew had a responsibility to show you the respect you deserve because you had helped him out financially.  So again I apologize for the way it made you feel.

When I answer people I always try to be diplomatic, and I suppose at times my answers may seem scripted but I assure you, unless I quote something, all what I say I say from my heart. I take on board your criticism of my style writing and I will have to investigate how to change my style.

You made the following comment – “I noticed you also refrained from saying "the truth" and instead chose "belief system". I must say, that was very surprising to me, that you would choose those words. “--   For me to say “the truth” is for fellow JWs.  None JWs do not see us as “being in the truth” so I used words that are more in common with the everyday person that I may talk to.  Of course I believe our belief system is “the truth” .  We have many terms that are peculiar to JWs and generally we use them only when conversing with JWs.

I know it is difficult for people to understand how we be in teaching the message that Jesus taught  The God News of Gods Kingdom, and yet seem to snub the people we talk to. The bottom line is the way of a Christian who wants to follow the Christ is just as those texts I sited early as well as what Jesus said  "If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. 19  If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world , but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” John 15:18,19 RSV.   We understand that to be a follower of Christ we must be no part of the world around us.  

I would like to present some information from one of our publications

         The Bible’s Viewpoint

         When Loved Ones Do Not Share Your Faith

ACCORDING to one estimate, there are more than 10,000 religions and sects in the world. In one country about 16 percent of the adult population have at some point switched from one religion to another. It is no wonder, then, that there are disagreements about religious beliefs among relatives and friends. Sometimes this results in strained relationships. Thus the question, How should Christians treat loved ones who do not share their faith?

         A Special Relationship

Consider, for instance, what the Bible says about the special relationship between parents and their children. No time limit is implied in the command at Exodus 20:12 to “honor your father and your mother.” In fact, in Jesus’ discussion of this command, recorded at Matthew 15:4-6, it is obvious that he was speaking of the honor that adult children would render to their parents.

The Bible book of Proverbs cautions against showing disrespect toward one’s parents. Proverbs 23:22 advises that you should “not despise your mother just because she has grown old.” Pointedly, Proverbs 19:26 warns that one who “is maltreating a father [and] that chases a mother away is a son acting shamefully and disgracefully.”

It is clear from the Scriptures that we should not neglect our parents. The fact that our parents do not accept our religion does not cancel our relationship with them. These Bible principles apply similarly to other blood relations and to one’s marriage mate. Clearly, Christians remain morally and Scripturally obligated to love their relatives.

         Reasonableness Is Vital

Of course, the Bible warns against bad association, and this influence could come from one’s immediate relatives. (1 Corinthians 15:33) Many faithful servants of God in the past stood up for what is right even though their parents disagreed. This evidently was true of Korah’s sons. (Numbers 16:32, 33; 26:10, 11) True Christians should not compromise their faith to please others, not even their relatives.—Acts 5:29.

In some situations parents or other loved ones vehemently fight against the beliefs of a Christian. Some may even become enemies of true Christianity. In such cases Christians take reasonable steps to protect their spirituality. Jesus aptly said: “A man’s enemies will be persons of his own household. He that has greater affection for father or mother than for me is not worthy of me; and he that has greater affection for son or daughter than for me is not worthy of me.”—Matthew 10:36, 37.

In most cases, however, Christians do not face severe opposition from their loved ones. Their relatives simply do not share the same understanding of Bible teachings. The Holy Scriptures encourage Christ’s followers to treat unbelievers “with mildness” and “deep respect.” (2 Timothy 2:25; 1 Peter 3:15) The Bible aptly counsels: “A slave of the Lord does not need to fight, but needs to be gentle toward all.” (2 Timothy 2:24) The apostle Paul also counseled Christians “to speak injuriously of no one, not to be belligerent, to be reasonable, exhibiting all mildness toward all men.”—Titus 3:2.

         Keep in Touch and Express Love

At 1 Peter 2:12, Christians are given this encouragement: “Maintain your conduct fine among the nations [unbelievers] that . . . they may as a result of your fine works of which they are eyewitnesses glorify God.” Often, loved ones who do not share our beliefs see the changes that the Bible has made in our life. Remember that many who were indifferent or even opposed to Bible truth have changed their mind. It may have taken many years of closely observing the good conduct of a marriage mate or a child for some individuals to investigate the reason behind that conduct. When people do not accept Bible truths, let it not be because they were neglected by a Christian loved one.

Admittedly, circumstances vary, and some Christian Witnesses live far away from their parents. It may not be possible to visit as often as desired. But writing letters, calling on the telephone, or keeping in contact regularly in other ways will assure our loved ones of our affection. Many who are not true Christians love their parents and other relatives and communicate regularly with them regardless of their religious affiliation. Should Christian Witnesses do any less?

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Again I want to apologize for for the way I made you feel.  

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Brenton Hepburn


I AM one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, and I am always learning. I am NOT an expert in the full sense of the word but I can answer questions on the reliability of the NWT - the so called mind control problems-so called prophecies - how being a JW affects the individual and relatives and general practices and history of Jehovah’s Witnesses. >>WARNING<< Please be aware that there are people here who ARE NOT practicing JWs. By all means ask these ones questions. Depending on the question you will get an honest answer, but, generally the answer you get, will mislead you as to what we believe, often because, they do not give ALL the relevant details. These ones will, have an agenda against JWs., and will at times give answers that are not correct in regard to JW teachings and practices. If you are after a answer from one of Jehovah’s Witnesses, please read some of the answers that the various experts have published before choosing someone. If you want to ask one of the NON JWs a question, that is fine, BUT if you want a balancing view after asking one of the NON JWs, ask a JW the same question. PLEASE ALSO NOTE: There(have been)and are, some "experts" here who are NOT always the most courteous and polite, at times are actually quite rude, that applies to both JW's and non JW's and their answers may offend, especially when they get personal and attack the character of the person and not the message. Unfortunately some here that have done that. So it IS IMPORTANT to chose an "expert" that YOU feel will best suit YOU by reading some of their past answers . . . . .


I have been a publisher since 1964. When I first went on the internet I found a lot of negative information dealing with Jehovah’s Witnesses covering prophecy, mind control and what many said was a very bad translation of the Bible known as the NWT. It shook my faith. After may hours researching these topics I could see why some felt that way, but, I was also able to explain why there were these misleading views. I can now set matters straight for anyone that has negative information about Jehovah’s Witness to show them that such information is at best misleading and at worst dangerous lies.

I have been a student of the Bible for many years, am trying to teach myself Biblical Greek. Was a public tax accountant for many years untill SEP 2009 when I gave it up due to health problems.

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