About Deborah Expertise I can answer questions regarding your status with either the person you are currently dating, or the person whom you would like to be dating. For example, does he or she feel the same way about you as you feel about them? I can help you look at your situation realistically, so that you can avoid being hurt emotionally.
Experience I have been through many relationships in high school, college, and as an adult before eventually getting married. I have been engaged multiple times before ultimately finding the right person.
Organizations I have answered over 3000 questions in this area on other health sites, such as ehealth, girlmom, and babygaga.
Education/Credentials I have a bachelor's Degree in Psychology and Biology, and am halfway through a Master's Degree, also in Biology. I have access to and read many of the top medical journals, from which I also get the best, most thorough and accurate to answers to pressing interpersonal, medical and health related questions.
Past/Present Clients girlmom, babygaga, ehealth over 3000 posts pro-choice talk over 6000 posts
Question Bare with me please. I have a friend that confuses me to no end. I've known her for about two years, we've been "close" for one. She is the meanest, sassiest, slick-mouthed woman you never want to meet, and I LOVE it about her. Anyway, it's like she tries to act like she doesn't like me as much as she really does. I mean, her attitude is toward everyone, not just me, she's been like that for as long as anyone can remember, that's not the problem. Actually, she was much nicer to me until I made a move for her. Ever since, I've been seeing that side to her, yet we have been more and more involved. Other women can tell that she is really into me, I can too, sort of, but she tries her best not to show it. I don't know what to believe, what she says or what she does. I ask her out, try to do things for her, trying to go all out to show her my intentions are real. She says no to nearly all my offers. Then, she,ll suddenly decide that she wants to spend some time alone with me. We're intimate nearly on a regular, but haven't even gone out on a date. Huh? Basically, she displays so many signs that maybe she isn't into me, but when I start to believe that and act accordingly, that's when the hard act tones downs and she acts like she doesn't mean to be that way. I'm confused because she spends so much time acting one way, then the other when she sees that I don't feel like chasing her anymore. What is on this woman's mind? She likes me too, but has such a hard time showing it. I'm not in a rush for anything, I want to take it slow and earn her love and trust. I'm tired of the game she plays, or whatever it is. I can't get any clarity from her, so what should I do? What did I get myself into?
Answer Dear Arlondo,
It sounds like this woman is very confused about her own feelings. If I were you I would move on and find someone else. Maybe if you stop trying to please her she will realize her true feelings for you and act accordingly.
