How to Know if He/She Really Likes You/A guy in work I know.
QUESTION: This guy in work is Married age 45 & I'm 32,his name is Colm.very nice friendly guy,to people he meets. When he is not bring to other people's attention that I'm doing a good job.At what I'm doing at that time,he is asking me what is my favorite song. Then there was the time at the Christmas party.The asking of what song I like came days after that party.I was in the room with him.Him at his desk and I was across the room at another desk.Only the two of use was in the room.He calls across the room ''Julie whats yr favouite song''? lets see if I can play that for you.Song ends now there is yr song for toay'.''And tomorrow I'll play you another one of yr favoutes''.He was in really,really great mood the time I was with him chatting.2 weeks ago he had come into reception to see someone off at the door.On the way past me.He says ''I'm cold'' I say ''It is cold''misunderstand what he ment.He says it again I'm cold,I need a god women to warm me up''.After that he says something like ''and yr the only one''but in saying that I only got bites of it.Just the other day,he comes into reception (Receptionist is my job) to go out.Even though he saw me that Morning,on the phone & he was just arriving in to work signing the sign in sheet to say what time he came into work.He stops to say on his way out the door ''Where were you?'' ''Haven't seen you all day''.The girl I work with, was up stairs a few times I would some times be up there but not that day.Our staff work on the 4th floor and Reception is on the ground floor.After that,there was no getting rid of him.He comes back in from outside in only 5mins.''You'd need a good women,to warm you up''''In yr case a man,or what ever yr into(joking)''.His behavior was cut,comes in saying that to me.As he wonders over to a empty magazine stand that was beside my desk,fiddling with it.Comes around to stand in front of me talking then goes up stairs,only to come down again in 2mins. Into reception and sites down,a few feet away from my desk.Just himself and I,not a word from him,so I started to chat to him. (Forgive me for going on,just wanted to see what you thought of all this behavior). Two people he knows and I know arrived that he deals with,as part as his job.Thay come in and went up the stairs with Colm,now these people come in all the time.And go up to the 4th floor with out having Colm having to come down to meet them??? The next day,I come from up stairs down to reception & he is there again very rare to see him down.Chatting to my colleague,looks at me, then back to my colleague still chatting. He is a few feet away from in front of us & I am sitting at my desk with my colleague.Listening to what they were chatting about I then turned away from listening to them.As I moved my chair over a little bite away from their conversation .To pick up my mobile to play with,he darts over quickly.To stand very close to my desk in front of me ,the only thing standing between me and him was the desk.And I could feel him looking me to shy to look up.He's standing there fiddling with a papers on the desk.I was aware that Catherine was talking to him but he wasn't.For him to be talking to Catherine and not me.He didn't go near her at all he was a good bite away from her.And comes over to me even though I'm not the one having the conversation with him. Today,he has gone from ( my name being Julie-ann )Julie to Jewels.I had go up to his desk yesterday to him to give him a message about a phone call.And he said ''Ambrose who??'' told him and he says''thanks Julie'' and the room he was in was full of people quietly doing work at their desks.He seems to have no problem calling me Julie in front of other staff members does it a lot.And before going home yesterday he comes down to reception to go home.He was on the phone chatting to someone signed the time on the sign out sheet.About to leave turns back closes the door and sites down.Still chatting,could of left having the conversation on his way to his car.When finishing the phone call,he stands and says see you tomorrow.And then said it in Spanish and asked me isn't that what is means.There is a few other things that have me scratching my head in wonder.I have a feel some staff memebers know something I don't. I'd love to ask a Girl called Emma that he works with him,is there something up.something going on. So MY QUESTION IS : From all that I've mentioned,I'm I over think it all or Does he fance me,is coming on to me even? Thank U so much
ANSWER: Hi Julie-ann,
My apologies for sending this question to the pool; I just needed more time to answer it. :)
I wanted to make sure I had ample time to read over your letter several times before I responded and understood all the elements in it. Now that I've done so, I'm ready to answer your question. :) Well, Julie-ann, from what you've described in your letter, it does sound to me as if he's coming onto you, quite a bit actually. He's paying special attention to you that is way beyond a platonic level. Since you mention that he's married, this is rather alarming. The question is, what do you want to do with this information, now that you have it? From your letter, I'm getting that you were wanting to know if your instincts were right, rather than to do something about it. If this is the case, I would advise you to be careful; if he's not looking to actively and physically have an affair, he's definitely looking to have an emotional one. Be on your guard.
I hope that this answers your question, Julie-ann, and if you have any more questions, I'd be happy to answer them for you.
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QUESTION: Thank you so much for yr reply.I just want to hear it from someone else,to see for sure if I'm right or just over thinking it. In the knowing that he is married.I have no intentions in getting involved with him.I don't want him to be seen as a not a nice guy.Going by the way he is behaving towards me.He is a lovely,caring guy,there is no inappropriate touching from him...so fare anyway.Is he unhappy at home,I wounder. Q: When you say that he might be looking for a emotional one.Could you talk more about that,what do you mean?
THANK U DEEPLY
ANSWER: Hi Julie-ann,
When I say an emotional affair, I mean that he might not be looking for someone to physically have sex with, but make a connection with someone that will make him feel good; make him feel like a man. Men naturally gravitate towards women that men them feel like a king, a makes them feel manly. If he's not getting that at home, he may be looking for someone that makes him feel good about himself. All men long for that kind of deep connection with a woman because it make him feel special and appreciated. So, to sum up my meaning, he may just have been looking for someone to make him feel good about himself and that he felt safe being himself around.
I hope this answers your question, and I'd be happy to answer any more questions you might have. :)
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QUESTION: What do you think about,when he says ''I need a good woman to warm me up''Coming from someone that is married.To come from someone that is single I would understand,would make since to come from a single guy.He lives in the country side and travels up to the city to work & has a place.He goes to when he isn't going home.He comes to work in good form or that could be because it's a nice place to work.He would say ''if someone calls for me I'll be back in 20mins but that's slim to none''.Would say this a few times to the point where. I started to think is he hinting at something. Going back in September,our company just moved into a new building.In reception I was sitting & the wall behind me was bare no picture not even painted.He comes to go out & he says'' that wall needs something.''I does,a good paint ' I said.He then says''We could blow up a big picture of you and put it on the wall.''oh, no'' I say 'why,not''. What do U think? THANKS AGAIN.It real helps to talk to someone about this.
Please accept my deepest apologies for taking so long to get this back to you. Well, from what you've described he's said, it does seem to me as if this man is, in many way, flirting with you. It truly does seem to me that he's unhappy in his marriage, and is looking elsewhere to fill the void, or whatever it is that he's unhappy about. Looks like he's looking to fill that void through you. Having that been said, I would really advise you to be careful of this man; try not to be alone with him too often if you can help it, and really don't give him any reason to think that you would be receptive to his advances. Truly, keep your distance from this man. Further, you might even want to speak to someone in your workplace about him, if for nothing else than to protect yourself, because he truly is flirting with you.
I hope that this helps you, and if you have any other questions, I'd be happy to help you out. :)