How to Know if He/She Really Likes You/Is he interested in me?

Advertisement


Question
QUESTION: Hi there,

I met this wonderful older man over a month ago and he has given me amazing experiences that no man has given me before. We met through a work project and we just connected. He is a pretty cool guy and he is 43. He would take me out to nice resturants a couple of times a week, he cooked for me, introduced me to a couple of his closet friends and I even spoke to his best friend on the phone who is a Sarge at Delta and says that Sebastian has told so much about me!
Sebastian tells people that I am his good friend when he introduces me and not so sure if that is a bad sign? He took me to go see the christmas tree and it was such a wonderful experience and he is planning on taking me to Broadway and I have never been to a broadway show! He isn't trying to get into my pants at all but he mentions that sometimes sex can ruin things and then later on he asks when we will do it. I told him not once I am in a relationship.
He says he has so much respect for me and he has truly moved mountains for me. He and I are going to a charity even together in a couple of months and I have never had any of my bfs do that. They are always being selfish and being lazy.
Sebastian offered to cook a lovely meal for me and my friends at his studio which is a wonderful offer. He has helped me get some work opportunities and it has been a wonderful experience.
I spent the night at his place and he cuddled with me but we didn't have sex or do a deep makeout session. It feels nice that he doesn't expect anything in return but when I had to leave for the day he kissed me on the lips for the first time.
Also last week when I was at his friends for new years he introduced me to his friends and bragged about me, kept telling him how beautiful and amazing I was. We took a photograph together but he says I am his good friend. He says to me in public, in front of everyone, "I would like to continue and grow ourfriendship."  
When I first met him he mentions that he is looking to get married and wants children and just gotten out of a relationship with someone who didn't sount very stable.
I am wondering if he is doing this because he likes my company and friendship or if he is really into me? I am falling for him.

ANSWER: Hi Allison,

You can take a breather and relax honey, this guy is more than interested in you. :) In fact, I wager to say that his level of interest is not the issue here at all. The issue, if you can call it that, seems to be that he is calling you a friend; I see that this makes you a bit nervous.  In the details of what you've shared with me, I think I see why: you shared with me that Sebastian has just come out of a relationship with a woman who was not particularly stable. So it stands to reason that he is not quite ready to call it a relationship, or you his girlfriend.  It's more a matter of his guard still slightly being up than of his interest in you. He does like you and is attracted to you (and trust me, though he's been quite the gentleman about it, he DOES want to have sex with you!) If the title of friend truly continues to bother him, I would have a talk with him, and make it clear that you're not seeing anyone else, then ask him what he thinks about that. His answer will be very telling, and get him much more open to talking about where he is in the commitment process. :)

I hope this helps Allison, and if you have any more questions, I'd be happy to answer them for you.

Always,

Nicolette.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Yes and today he invited me to go to church with him and he says that means a lot to him that I was able to make it. He is so bleeping amazing! I am falling for him and I rarely commit to any man but with him I would...we work well together and I am attracted to him. He is a real man, gentleman and has been pursuing our friendship. He is always taking me out and doing incredable things together. He has given me so many wonderful experiences that I haven't even experienced yet. He lets me grow and gives me the love that I need.
He is wonderful. Well I feel like I want to go with the flow and I AM OK with the fact that he is calling me as a friend for now since we did meet a month ago. Eventually I hope he will start calling me as his gf soon.
He treats me like gold and I am falling for him. :)
So yes...he is very interested in me and I shouldn't worry. Right?

Answer
Yeah, absolutely! He's most definitely interested in you, he's just taking his time getting to know you and not trying to rush into things. This is a great quality to find a guy, so you can certainly take comfort in that. At this point, the best thing to do is just sit back, relax, and enjoy your time and budding relationship with him. :) Try not to worry about things that are out of your control, and truly take the time to enjoy this man. I'm saddened to see so few women actually enjoy their man because they usually spend so much time obsessing over every little thing, and typically it's something that they can't control in the first place. Don't be added among that number. Give yourself the ability to just relax and enjoy what you have. :)

Always,

Nicolette

How to Know if He/She Really Likes You

All Answers


Answers by Expert:


Ask Experts

Volunteer


Nicolette

Expertise

Everyone gets confused sometimes when it comes to matters of the heart. We all want to know if that special someone at school or work was winking at you, or if if they just had something in their eye. I can help you find whether your intended likes you, signs to look for if you're unsure, and can help you in the right direction on where to go from there. I will be timely, personable, and friendly with you; it'll be like talking to an old friend. Give me a try; I bet I can help you! *Update* Because of rising expenses, I must say that I can only accept questions with a $2 donation. With the lengthy, friendly, and in-depth response you'll get from me, it will be well worth it. Thank you for understanding.

©2016 About.com. All rights reserved.