You are here:

How to Know if He/She Really Likes You/Ending Potential relationship

Advertisement


Question
Hey How are you? I hope all is well. My question is about a guy I am friends with but we are moving into dating stage soon. He is currently  sending mixed messages. He only acts as if he is interested in me when talking about sex topics. We have never gone out on a date because he never invited me out to sit and learn about me on an actual date but he doesn't want me to go out with anyone else. He is usually very busy but when he isn't he doesn't talk with me to get to know me and the only invite I got from him is to go to his house and to a pool party so he can get to see what I look like in a swimsuit. Though he is a sharing person he mentioned that I am not in possession of his wallet yet because I am not serious about him. I don't know how he said that when I usually do most of the calling to see how he is doing and he usually is too busy or tired to call me as he confessed. He is 50, divorced  and has children while I am single in my twenties and has no kids. Before he spent money on me last time he was very quiet while thinking before asking me if I wan something to eat. It is as if he was hesitant to. I asked him for us to go to a nice restaurant for my birthday celebration but he said it can be a lunch time when he has time off from one of his games or office work. Eventually I told him I don't think we are right for each other because I notice he only wants sex and I want a family, marriage eventually and love. Did I do the right thing?

Answer
Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to answer your question. I apologize greatly for the delay in my reply - I had a tragic loss in my family and have been out of sorts for some time and just now signing back in to my computer to realize I had waiting messages.

you ABSOLUTELY did the right thing and please do not second guess your decision any longer. You are in your twenties, he is older and has been married and divorced - not too many men who have been married and divorced at his age is ready to settle down again so quickly, if at all. You have too much to offer, please do not settle. It's obvious that he has only one thing on his mind - SEX and you need to let him know that you are worth more than that. You let him know by your actions - women can talk all day long, but men NEVER go by that - they watch for your actions and will proceed based on that. You have to see yourself as a grand prize that any man should be lucky to win regardless of their age. If you aren't doing so already, try to be intimate with someone ONLY after they've committed themselves to you and only you.

You sound like one smart cookie, so I'm sure you may already know these things. As a woman I know we ALWAYS want confirmation we've made the right decisions, especially when it come to matters of the heart. Well I'm here to tell you - you definitely did the right thing so KUDOS to you.

The only thing I would have changed was when you told him you thought you two weren't right for each other, I would have shouted it from the roof top "I KNOW WE ARE NOT RIGHT FOR EACH OTHER". LOL  If he ever attempts to contact you, (which it won't shock me if he doesn't until he is 100% he's not getting any sex) tell him to kick rocks, scram, whatever... Don't be surprised if he'll even attempt to give you something you've asked for - like a nice dinner or whatever - this is the games men play, especially older men. (I know from experience) - stay strong in your decision and keep it moving. Eventually the right guy will come along and give you all that you desire and more - you just have to believe it will happen and not settle, no matter what.

I hope I've answered your question and have encouraged you to keep moving forward. I know it's hard at times, but you're so worth it.

Good luck!

Latoya

How to Know if He/She Really Likes You

All Answers


Answers by Expert:


Ask Experts

Volunteer


Latoya

Expertise

Sometimes our vision can become cloudy when dealing with love and relationships, and sometimes a second voice is needed. Allow me to be that voice of reason. I will be able to provide you with advice, options & necessary steps to handle the situation at hand. I am not proclaiming to have all of the answers, but please know that I will try my best to answer your questions as affectively as possible. I can assure you that any questions you may have regarding love, relationships, If he/she really likes you, etc..will be answered in a timely manner.

Experience

Each individual relationship I've been in has allowed me to gain a notch of experience that I have placed on my belt of knowledge. Through my many experiences I've learned how to recognize if a relationship is or is not a healthy one. My knowledge allows me to assist friends and family members when in need of sound advice.

Education/Credentials
Experience from high school, college and life

©2016 About.com. All rights reserved.