Lesbian Erotica/Confused


Hi Blue

Unfortunately there has been no improvement in my situation. However, it seems as if there is a change; I have totally withdrawn from her sexually since I decided to masturbate more often. And now, recently, I've noticed a slight change is her behaviour. In the last week she has more than once told me she's feeling frustrated. She has also mentioned to me one morning that she had an sexual intimate dream about us and "it was great". During all this I am very tempted to just give in, obviously still frustrated myself.

The other night while lying in bed getting ready to sleep, I could tell she wasn't ready to sleep and had other plans. I know her and I know exactly when she wants to be intimate. But she doesn't say a word. I didn't give her any indication that I felt the same. Eventually we both fell asleep and that's it. No resentment the next day, nothing out of the ordinary. Though we both know that something is not right. Why can she not just 'OUT WITH IT'? I mean TAKE ME, I AM YOURS! Anyway..

I want to know what's happening with me though? Why am I all of a sudden not interested as much? I am still frustrated, and I still find her very attractive, I do want her! But as soon as a tickling session becomes too intimate, I back off. And actually she does too. Why is this happening?


We can speculate forever about what is going on. What we need are answers. But without communication there will be no answers. And the two of you still do not communicate.

Any comment I make will only be an educated guess.

It does seem to me that your girlfriend is trying to drop subtle hints. It seems like she has noticed that you no longer try to initiate sex with her.

If you can remain patient she may very well come to you and and assert her desires. But she may just not have it in her to be that forward. From the way you describe her she seems very reserved and requires delicacy and subtlety.

As far as YOU- you are having your immediate sexual needs satisfied with masturbation. Because of that it does not seem so urgent now to initiate sex with your girlfriend, even though you still wish that your needs were being met with your girlfriend instead of masturbation.

Actually, it kind of sounds like there is some improvement overall.

I am thinking that if you continue as you are- a change is likely to come.

I am thinking there is going to be happiness in your near future.

Love and hugs, J-


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Blue Sleighty


BLUE SLEIGHTY HAS BEEN AN EXPERT FOR OVER 5 YEARS! I will do my best to answer any legitimate question. If I can NOT answer it- I will be happy to provide references to someone that I believe can help you.


I have been a lesbian all of my life, and realized that there was something different going on with me by the time I was 6 years old. I have faced the same issues and have made many of the same mistakes that other lesbians have. Part of my journey as a woman and a lesbian has included educating myself, and exploring my sexuality and my body. I have had a wealth of experiences and while marching down my path seeking a better understanding of myself and others, I have gathered information along the way from studying publications of the best sex experts of our time, like Susie Bright, Annie Sprinkle (who is a lesbian, now!), Xaviera Hollander (who is doing some great work on YouTube these days!), and many others. I have been fortunate to benefit from the wisdom, experience and research of these brilliant and brave women as well as my own. I have had an active and adventurous sex life and I am a healthy and happy woman. I am published and a widely known writer of lesbian erotica.

MySecretObsession.com, AuthorsDen.com, AuthorZone.com, CafeBoudoir.com, many others. Author of 25 short stories, and 3 novellas which can be found at Amazon.com, and Lulu.com , as well as many other on line book sellers. You can also find me on Facebook and Twitter.

Along with the privledge of having an oddly interesting and far from boring life which has afforded me a rather unique perspective, I have an AA from the Texas Academy of Art. I am a midwife and worked with a team of midwives at a birthing center where I performed well woman exams, managed prenatal care, and delivered babies as well as managing home births for 3 years, which gives me plenty of hands on experience with the female body. I have the equivalent of a MA in life experiences and personal independent study as measured by UH life credit testing, and I constantly read college psychology textbooks, Psychology/Psychiatry News in the AMAJ, Psychology Today, and other educational journals. I write professionally and am respected and loved in the genre of lesbian erotica. I am a lesbian mother of a now adult, well-adjusted, degreed, happily married for 5 years, heterosexual daughter. I'm 40.

Awards and Honors
Every time someone thanks me for helping them is an award and an honor for me. Also, I was just thanked by the author, 'the mysterious Jade', in the acknowledgements of her new, page turning lesbian erotic thriller, "Secretly Bound", for being her mentor and for inspiration, advice and friendship. I have business associations with some of the best artists and writers of our time.

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