Expert: Karla Little - 10/13/2009

Question
My question is that I would like to know wherether she flirts with me or is just my imagination. Well it all started when began working at the place that I work now. The first time that I met her, I found her attracted. But I knew that she was married, so I didn't do much. Now we are good friends...but when we work together, she looks at me a lot. Or she tries to touch me or get my attention. She asks me question what I did or what I've been up to. Or when I'm talking to someone very close, she tries to hear what we are talking about. When I'm flirting with someone else, she make faces or looks upset. I'm not the only one that has noticed, a co-worker has noticed also. And the reason, I haven't said anything is because of respect and that maybe I'm reading her wrong. But I'm starting to feel an attraction towards her, and I don't want to ruin the relationship.

Answer
Well Suzy, let's take this one step at a time. Flirting is a awesome thing when there are two people that can participate even when it is innocence. But if your co-worker friend is married, I say she's off limits. I know that sounds old school, but I am old school. You do not want to start becoming attracted to a friend that is in a committed relationship, even if she seems interested. My way of thinking is if she pays no regard to her present relationship, how do you think she will regard another? Flirting can be fun, but if it leads to more, there is where the problem comes in, I say three is a crowd. Hope I was helpful. Karla