Lesbian Life/Stupid college crushes


I've recently started my second semester of college and to state it simply: I have a crush. I noticed her the first day of class, but with so many bad experiences with crushes I decided not to act on it... until she spoke to me. And usually I wouldn't read too much into something as small as talking, but it was the way she approached me that made me wonder if maybe she'd noticed me the way I noticed her. She walked by me, slowed down and almost didn't even stop, but she turned around last minute and started a conversation. Since I generally suck at socializing, the conversation didn't last long.
Next class I caught her looking over her shoulder at me a few times. Maybe it's nothing. I do have a bad habit of picking out the details, putting them under a microscope and dissecting every possible thing it could mean. I have no idea if she's interested in girls and as much as I want to talk to her again, I'm really, really, really, really, really nervous and awkward and scared and I don't know. I guess I could just use some sense of direction here. I've been rejected so many times it's hard to let myself think anyone would like me. Anyways, thank you in advance for your time.


You sound just like me when I was in college. I had lots of crushes that always went nowhere and when someone did like me, I had no clue. Everyone over thinks things when it comes to crushes so don't beat yourself up too much.

It sounds like this girl is interested in you on some level. Maybe she just wants to be friends or maybe she has a crush on you, too. If I were in your situation, I would allways make a point of saying "hi" to her when you see her and make yourself "available" for her to talk to you. I was always socially awkward so it takes time to build up a confidence and comfort. Do the best you can when talking to her. Remember, she is only human, just like you.

When I was in college, I had a few classes where a group of us would grab a meal or snack before or after class. If you have a test coming up or a big assignment or something like that you could always ask her (and some other people if you feel uncomfortable)to grab food and talk about the class or something like that. I got a few dates out of doing this.

Keep your calm and try to make yourself more open to conversation. Don't come on too strong and it might be best not to mention that you have a crush on her for awhile. Just get to know her and look at her as a friend first and that might help you get your nerves under control.

Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!  

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Alicia Thompson


I can answer questions about lesbian relationships, dating, coming out, what to do if you like someone who isn't a lesbian, and how to know if you or someone else is a lesbian. I am also willing to be a friendly ear to anyone who just needs someone to talk to-sometimes that is all we need.


I am a lesbian and have lived openly for over 15 years. I had to figure lesbian life out on my own because it wasn't socially acceptable when I came out. I belonged to gay clubs in college and have pretty much seen it all in the gay community. i am currently in a very happy lesbian relationship but I had to date a lot of toads before I found my princess. I've always been the advice giver for my friends. I just like to see people happy and talking to someone on the outside of the situation usually helps.

I volunteer for the local YMCA and served as a Big Sister until the local chapter ran out of money and closed.

I have an Associate's Degree in Humanities and a Bachelor's Degree in Speech Communications.

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