Lesbian Life/Questions Answered by Expert Lena Torres

SubjectDate Asked
Confused with my partner9/16/2011
  Q: My girlfriend (30 years old) and me (18 years old) are in a long distance relationship for 4 years, ...
  A: At 30, if you make a list of what you need from a partner, it is difficult find someone who is 18 ...
Break up, or not?9/13/2011
  Q: . Um.. I'm not really sure how to begin... I've been in a long distance relationship with my ...
  A: In my experience, cheating doesn't happen because "there are too many cute girls around." It ...
Friends..maybe more?9/12/2011
  Q: I've been friends with a girl for 2 years now. This year we got really close. Now I'm a lesbian and ...
  A: One thing I recommend that folks do is, create a side-by-side list labeled 'Wants' on one column and ...
What to do?7/15/2011
  Q: I don't want to blabber on with my whole story here, but here is a bit of background. A few years ...
  A: I have a heterosexual friend who I once questioned about this. I asked: Do women who are primarily ...
Confused and looking for advice7/9/2011
  Q: I am 25 and significantly confused about my sexuality. Although I have only been in relationships ...
  A: A "phase" -- why stop at that? When it could be anything, from an obsessive-compulsive disorder to a ...
Affair with a lesbian in an "open" relationship7/4/2011
  Q: This is an email I never thought I would be writing. I am a straight single professional man. ...
  A: There seem to be many appealing qualities about her which may be rare in other women. This, coupled ...
Long term relationship question7/3/2011
  Q: I've been in a relationship with my gf for 4 years. We've had a pretty rocky go of it but we both ...
  A: Not all relationships turn out to be ideal 'romantic' matches. Though many appear just magical, at ...
Transference6/29/2011
  Q: I am an 18 year old woman freshly out of highschool. For the past year I have been seeing a sexual ...
  A: Most therapists, are trained in the area of transference. To some degree, they have all experienced ...
Two truths6/25/2011
  Q: It’s a horribly long story, but to begin I will say that I have fallen head over heels in love with ...
  A: You are wise beyond your years. In reading your letter, I felt certain that you have great instincts ...
is my wife gay4/28/2011
  Q: My wife and I have been separated for 6 months now. The main problem started with a new friend she ...
  A: Considering what you have been lead to believe as this woman's track-record and/or reputation, it ...
confused and scared4/2/2011
  Q: I am a 36yr old woman who has identified as lesbian for over 10 years now. Came out at 25 to my ...
  A: Kudos on going with the feeling, despite all the (community) voices in your head leading you ...
Stuck3/29/2011
  Q: hey! i don't really hop on these blogs or anything but my situation has gotten so out of control ...
  A: You want non-judgmental advice and I will stick to that request by addressing the subject indirectly ...
is she flirting with me?3/28/2011
  Q: I moved to a new city a couple months ago and had to do a job transfer. I am in a lesbian ...
  A: Back away immediately. Did I read correctly, that you -- have a partner? Where is your partner, in ...
Flirty OR Friendly?3/8/2011
  Q: So, I work in this restaurant in WeHo as a server and every Sunday this one group comes in.. A few ...
  A: Do you like her? If you don't, she may give you "the look, the vibe, the swag, the smile" and the ...
Lesbian Life3/2/2011
  Q: I was wondering how can i have a relationship with God and still like females and im a female. i ...
  A: Most of us, at one time or another wonder how, conventional religious teachings and homosexuality; ...
Confusion2/20/2011
  Q: Ok so I actually have a few questions. I'll start off by saying that I'm 19 years old, and I know ...
  A: It would not be unheard of that if you have been mistreated by men, you might feel mistrusting ...
l think l've fallen in a very short time.2/17/2011
  Q: Ok...Lena here we go... This will be in my first book...Watch for it in book stores.. l was out ...
  A: She's right. 'No contact' is exactly the path to take here. First, you have each been less than ...
So I guess the secrets out....12/27/2010
  Q: So I think this will read as a confessional more than a question because up until this moment this ...
  A: The "Secret is Out!" Liberating huh? I view your dilemma as having a side A and side B and each ...
please help me12/25/2010
  Q: It all started when we wanted to move I was hanging out with this girl and yes after awhile we both ...
  A: All families have secrets that are exclusively reserved for the priviledged few. Some families are ...
I don't think my girlfriend fancies me anymore12/23/2010
  Q: I'm 35 and in my first lesbian relationship. My girlfriend is 33 and has been lesbian all her life; ...
  A: If I had to guess exactly what is happening here and was only allowed one right answer, I would say ...
not sure about how she feels12/21/2010
  Q: I think im developping a crush on a girl at work, the problem is that to me she seems very straight ...
  A: Awkwardness at work is one thing, but suppose a relationship develops -- one scenario to consider, ...
Just friends?12/20/2010
  Q: I'm in a lesbian couple and we recently made friends with another female. I am starting to feel ...
  A: It would be a mistake to assume that a brief, initial attraction like this to another person, would ...
Confused!12/13/2010
  Q: Well here I am at 26 confused about my sexuality. I've never felt completely comfortable with the ...
  A: You did the right thing! You needed to work-through-it by talking about it and you did. You did so, ...
Confused!12/12/2010
  Q: Well here I am at 26 confused about my sexuality. I've never felt completely comfortable with the ...
  A: I have said often, that I do not believe in labels. Labels lock you into a box and your perspective ...
my first lesbian love12/8/2010
  Q: Back in college a friend of mine that was openly gay. She confessed that she had feeling for me a ...
  A: Greater exposure to the lesbian lifestyle. That is my recommendation, for you. As for her, she is ...
I am so in love and confused12/6/2010
  Q: Please help: When I was younger I had a ton of boyfriends, but I always hated the thought of being ...
  A: I just read an article in the current issue of Psychology Today, which claims: "Anytime there are ...
Why doesn't my girlfriend treat me as well as her ex-girlfriends11/21/2010
  Q: I have been in love with the same woman for almost 2 years. In that time, she has chosen someone ...
  A: Your"Should I walk away from the relationship or overlook this as a minor thing and try to be at ...
No sure...10/14/2010
  Q: So here is the question....l can't seem to stop failing for married women....All of my ...
  A: To get at the core of the problem, I will change the question from: "Why can't I stop falling for ...
Sexual Feelings9/29/2010
  Q: I am currently not quite a lesbian because I've only been with two women (one my age 20, and one ...
  A: Being a lesbian is not only about, "sexual feelings" though these are sometimes part of the picture. ...
I Don't Think I Enjoy Sex9/19/2010
  Q: I'm 20, female, and I live with my girlfriend. She's an extremely beautiful woman, very sexy, and ...
  A: Sex is not usually the most important thing in a relationship, until you're not having any and ...
what label ? if any9/7/2010
  Q: Here go's Lena....dated men most of my life..42 years old have had three ways about 4-5 times. With ...
  A: Here is a great website for you to visit - linger: http://members3.boardhost.com/Ask_Joanne You ...
I'm confused!8/27/2010
  Q: Im so confused! Everybody thinks I'm straight, I have a boyfriend and I love him to death. There is ...
  A: So you have passed for 'heterosexual' up until this point. Lots of folks do on the way to ...
Gay girl straight girl crush8/21/2010
  Q: So I've recently come out to a select few family members but no one at my high school. Not that ...
  A: As it happens, you are writing to somebody who doesn't believe in labels. In my view, everyone's ...
Should I proceed??8/20/2010
  Q: I met a particular female on a popular dating website that I'm very interested in. We live ...
  A: I often caution women about becoming too deeply involved in a long-distance or on-line relationship ...
curious8/11/2010
  Q: I have this situation where over a few months me and this girl been working together, and see each ...
  A: Straight girls do flirt with other girls. Sometimes this is not conscious. In her case, everything ...
I'm in a lesbian relationship, but I'm very unsure about my sexuality.8/3/2010
  Q: I have been dating this wonderful girl for about a year now, and we are having a great time ...
  A: In general, I do not believe in labels. They are useful to some extent and for the purpose of ...
Some Advice?8/2/2010
  Q: This is my first time ever asking a question to an expert over the internet, so please don't mind ...
  A: There is simply no way to tell what she‘s thinking. Even if you know for a fact that she has the ...
married and questioning7/13/2010
  Q: What are my options? How do I handle this? I'm 29 and have been married 5 years. Overall, I've been ...
  A: On occasion, I have tackled the proverbial: How do you eat an elephant, question. The answer ...
First Real Lesbian Relationship Need Help7/6/2010
  Q: Hey Lena. I'm 26 years old, and I recently meet a girl on a dating site that Ive had a profile on ...
  A: Particularly because you have both "been through a lot" and because, you "both have trust issues," I ...
Saving a relationship after the long distance7/2/2010
  Q: My girlfriend and I (same sex) are still together for 3 plus years, the past five months have been a ...
  A: "Is there anything I can do to to improve myself?" This is the most important question of all. In ...
Saving a relationship after the long distance7/1/2010
  Q: My girlfriend and I (same sex) are still together for 3 plus years, the past five months have been a ...
  A: In what way is she "stringing you along?" Try as I may, I cannot see evidence of that in anything ...
Coming out6/29/2010
  Q: Heya, basically my mum caught me holding my exs hand about a year ago but we never talked about it ...
  A: Make sure you are well prepared, before you make the big announcement. Arm yourself with as much ...
Habitual Cheating6/25/2010
  Q: I am stuck! My partner of 3 years has cheated on me at least 8 times that I know of, some of those ...
  A: I think the one, most crucial thing to always keep reminding yourself of and what the psychologist ...
Habitual Cheating6/22/2010
  Q: I am stuck! My partner of 3 years has cheated on me at least 8 times that I know of, some of those ...
  A: I have often said on this column, that the problem with cheating is more a problem the resulting ...
Am i a lesbian?6/20/2010
  Q: Hey im emma from uk ive been with my husband for 8years married for 2years. ive been with him since ...
  A: No one can tell you if you're a lesbian or not. The answer lies, not outside of yourself, but ...
Question about daughter6/16/2010
  Q: I feel tha my 18 year old daughter is less interested in guys, in my opinion because she's been ...
  A: What your daughter is doing, is perfectly natural. Experimentation, is a necessary part of ...
Question6/15/2010
  Q: I am really struggling right now with figuring out my sexual orientation/accepting it. I kind of ...
  A: I think that what you describe sounds extremely common. You say: "I look very straight." According ...
My wife may be in the closet about being gay.6/9/2010
  Q: I have been married for 10 years. Our sex life was always mutual and full of passion for years. But ...
  A: Don’t wait around for her to get counseling. If she is not ready, that is OK. Ultimately, you can ...
age difference - would it be an issue?6/7/2010
  Q: first of all i'm so glad i found a place to seek advice on this. my question is, how much age ...
  A: If I were you, I would not make that big of a deal about trying to prove to her that you are mature. ...
My wife may be in the closet about being gay.6/1/2010
  Q: I have been married for 10 years. Our sex life was always mutual and full of passion for years. But ...
  A: Kudos to you on being so observant. I find that an analytical nature, is more often a trait found ...
Is she into girls?5/28/2010
  Q: Ok so i'm 16 and a lesbian. I like this girl at school and she gives me such a gay vibe. I've tried ...
  A: I do not believe in labels. What you describe sounds more to me like, someone who is intent in ...
girls5/26/2010
  Q: Im 18 and Im a lesbian :) Im single right now but im looking. The girl im trying to see is bi ...
  A: First, congratulations on coming to a great conclusion. Figuring out that you play a part in most of ...
Is this it?5/21/2010
  Q: I'm a middle aged woman who started seeing women just a few years ago after falling in love with a ...
  A: One brilliant person I know says, “when (seemingly unrelated) topics come up in the same ...
girls5/15/2010
  Q: Im 18 and Im a lesbian :) Im single right now but im looking. The girl im trying to see is bi ...
  A: Before I respond to your question, I must get something out of the way. This is a point I have made ...
sleeping5/7/2010
  Q: Lena- my partner and i can not come to an agreement about a certain issue. When she goes to bed, she ...
  A: It is helpful for me to hear what helps and what doesn't. As for her unwillingness to accompany ...
sleeping5/6/2010
  Q: Lena- my partner and i can not come to an agreement about a certain issue. When she goes to bed, she ...
  A: This is not uncommon. You have to get to the root of the problem. This does not appear to be just ...
COMPLICATED!5/5/2010
  Q: ..I have been with my gf for almost 3 yrs she is my 1st gf...for the 13 months of our relationship ...
  A: First, realize that you have no control over your girlfriend's actions and no control over who she ...
COMPLICATED!5/4/2010
  Q: ..I have been with my gf for almost 3 yrs she is my 1st gf...for the 13 months of our relationship ...
  A: The problem between you is not her ex or the other people you have each brought into the triangle. ...
Spark5/3/2010
  Q: My girlfriend and I have had cheating issues on her part. I feel it is almost coming to an end and ...
  A: You have "forgiven her" and you have decided to stick around. I'd say you've done your part. The ...
interested?4/27/2010
  Q: I've known this girl for a while, but have never really spoken to her before. She's my best friends ...
  A: Don't let her actions dictate what you become involved in or not. Her behavior aside, ask yourself ...
Wanting to approach a person....but....4/21/2010
  Q: Ok, so here's the deal with me. I am lesbian but only select people know. I work in a school system ...
  A: Wouldn’t most of us feel silly if it were suddenly discovered that all people are interested in both ...
Is she Into me ? or What ?4/19/2010
  Q: I know a girl from almost a year now, we are friends. I was in a relationship to another girl when ...
  A: This girl seems like a really good candidate for a relationship. But when and with whom, is ...
Very Confussed need some advice4/3/2010
  Q: Im 25yrs old, and I am having hard time figuring out if Im bisexual or not. I find myself looking at ...
  A: The fact that she keeps her thoughts about relationships to her self, leads me to believe there is ...
Very Confussed need some advice4/2/2010
  Q: Im 25yrs old, and I am having hard time figuring out if Im bisexual or not. I find myself looking at ...
  A: I would bring the subject up again. You put it out there that you were interested in her. Now, you ...
What just happened........3/29/2010
  Q: So my ex and I have been broken up for about a month now, but we still live together. Last night we ...
  A: No one but her could possibly know for certain, if she does some of the things she does, "just to ...
What just happened........3/25/2010
  Q: So my ex and I have been broken up for about a month now, but we still live together. Last night we ...
  A: When we are in a relationship, rarely is one individual or the other, to blame for everything that ...
Very VERY confused, please help me.3/22/2010
  Q: Please don't stop reading after the first few lines, please :(. I'm 19 years old, and engaged to the ...
  A: What you describe, is similar in a lot of ways, to the first stages of the 'questioning' phase. Your ...
what to do about my ex girlfriend?3/21/2010
  Q: wel let me start by giving you some back round info.. i met my ex on an online dating site we hit it ...
  A: In this case, I’m going to pay the most attention to the event or series of events that took place ...
troubless3/20/2010
  Q: I was going out with my ex girlfriend for around 9/10 months and it was great, we just clicked from ...
  A: The reason why you continue to want to see her or to allow her to see you, has nothing to do with ...
what to do about my ex girlfriend?3/19/2010
  Q: wel let me start by giving you some back round info.. i met my ex on an online dating site we hit it ...
  A: You say, "I love her far too much to let her just walk out of my life without a fight." What exactly ...
5 year relationship3/15/2010
  Q: I have been in a committed relationship with a woman who is 54. I am 45. I have two children ...
  A: Part of how an abuser works his/her craft, is by whittling away at the victim's self-worth and sense ...
confused about my sexual orientation3/11/2010
  Q: "Im 17 and ive alwyas been sure about my sexual orientation but now something is different, i dont ...
  A: Usually, when we are attracted to one gender or another, it is not the entire population of that ...
Hard relationship3/8/2010
  Q: me and my girlfriend just broke up after 6 years. She is openly gay and I am not. We both work ...
  A: Communication is key. Don't just look at what is on the surface. Ask for and be willing to hear, her ...
Confess or Not to Confess?3/6/2010
  Q: I'm a high school student already 18 though and so is my best friend. Simply put I have the cliche ...
  A: You and your friend seem close. Telling her the truth about how you feel will be the real 'litmus ...
Is it over?2/17/2010
  Q: My gf & I have been together a little over 1 & 1/2 years with her moving in to my place right away. ...
  A: When a significant other, has behaved in a certain way for a long time and then abruptly changes, it ...
help2/15/2010
  Q: hey I'm corsandra, I was in a relationship with this wonderful girl for almost a year. we broke up a ...
  A: There is only one way to get a person back in your life and that is, for her to actually want to be ...
Unsure how to read date2/11/2010
  Q: I began exchanging emails with woman online about one week ago. We had only exchanged a few emails ...
  A: You seem like a perfectly reasonable person. You are allowing things to blossom naturally, assuming ...
Bad and very sudden breakup2/1/2010
  Q: I was in a wonderful relationship that lasted only two months. She wanted us to have a child ...
  A: There is such a thing as a bad ‘first date’ or even a bad ‘second date’ But once we figure out we ...
i love her! what do i do?1/30/2010
  Q: I was dating a girl for about 8 months who i absolutely fell in love with i never told her how i ...
  A: Of all the studies on the subject of rejection, I recall one in particular about our most common ...
Woman are confusing1/27/2010
  Q: I'm 19 and I work at a local gay bar bartending and wherein I met this girl that is 25 and hosts wet ...
  A: I like your last question, it's funny. Sometimes I wish I were psychic and could foresee the future, ...
too many white lies1/25/2010
  Q: Hey Lena, I made too many small mistakes, said too many white lies and I don't know why I did that ...
  A: Have you ever had anyone pursue you by whom you did not want to be pursued? Left to her own devices, ...
Im Confused1/13/2010
  Q: I am 15 and attend a all girl high school.I resently came out to my friends and my best friend is ...
  A: I really think it's wonderful that at 15, you already have such clarity about your sexuality. The ...
Confused teammate1/11/2010
  Q: So iv'e been playing on this basketball team for two years. Iv'e always thought my one teammate was ...
  A: Considering that, um, you're straight, why does it matter what her signals mean? If you are now ...
Angry all the time1/6/2010
  Q: Greetings, I have been living with my girlfriend for about 5 months-prior to this we had been seeing ...
  A: Some of us are rescuers. I include myself in this category. I once believed I could show another ...
ex lover1/3/2010
  Q: My ex lover for 4 1/2 years has found a new love. We have been apart for 1 1/2 years but she has ...
  A: In the community that surrounds me, I see ex-couples who are perfectly content now being friends. I ...
ex12/30/2009
  Q: My ex just broke up with me almost 2 weeks ago. She cheated on me and said that i made her do it ...
  A: You refer to this person as your "ex" and I find that interesting. Perhaps a part of you does ...
My First Time Girlfriend12/28/2009
  Q: Torres, I'm hoping you can help me because i just don't know what to do. I have been with my ...
  A: We know that, for Kay, "sex is something dirty. You say, she isn’t extremely religious, nor is she ...
Love triangle12/27/2009
  Q: I recently figured out I'm in love with my best friend. I went and told her that I liked her, and ...
  A: I wish I could tell you it is simple or that people do this every day. But the fact is, that walking ...
confused..12/14/2009
  Q: I am a 25 year old female who has always been in relationships with men but always appreciated ...
  A: What are you "confused" about? Why do you like this girl? Why such strong feelings for her? Is it ...
Looking for an answer!12/2/2009
  Q: We are not friends, and we barely speak. I have meet her in a bank. a small bank near my house. I ...
  A: Keeping with the fact that we can only change ourselves or have influence over our actions and since ...
Breakup11/27/2009
  Q: .ok me and my ex were dating for about 5 months when we brokeup due to the fact she wanted me to ...
  A: Trust your instincts! You called it correctly, when you said she is: "very immature at times" and ...
living with my ex girlfriend11/24/2009
  Q: My ex and I have been best friends for five years before we started dating, We recently broke up in ...
  A: Every once in a while I hear someone's story about continuing to live with an ex after the romantic ...
crush11/17/2009
  Q: Hey lena, my name is Amy, and my question is how do i ask my crush out, or what would be the correct ...
  A: Your friend is right when she suggests that you may be coming-on too strong. Not just when ...
Keke11/13/2009
  Q: There is this girl that I really do like. I've known her for over a year now and we've been best ...
  A: Recognizing that she really wants to “be there” for you, but that she cannot give you “100 percent” ...
Flirting11/10/2009
  Q: I recently started training to be a rape crisis counselor, and have been hanging out with one of the ...
  A: Just because she's flirtatious, high energy, warm, whimsical, and very outspoken with everyone else, ...
What to do next?11/2/2009
  Q: A girl and I have been friends for a few years and we have always had a flirty relationship. We have ...
  A: She has spoken, when she said: "she can't do this anymore.. I (you) haven't done anything wrong but ...
I don't understand myself.10/27/2009
  Q: Really, I'm in need of help. I can't do it alone, I'm out of control. It just happened, and I wasn't ...
  A: You may have a touch of internalized homophobia -- It's possible. A condition that is sure to ...
Needing to vent10/25/2009
  Q: Well I'm 18 and my best friend of almost a year now has moved back down to where I live. Before she ...
  A: Your statement about yourself: "I use to but I let it go because I didnt know how she felt," stands ...
Do you think I'm bi?10/23/2009
  Q: Ok, I literally can't believe I'm doing this. Like that I'm online even considering this but it's ...
  A: No, I don't think you're crazy for thinking something could happen between you just based on the ...
Lost10/5/2009
  Q: Ok Im 17 and the girl i like has a grilfriend. We have been talking for almost 4 months and she ...
  A: Yes, I can help you. But first, in order to receive "help" you must believe that the person giving ...
secret love with bff and now...it's gone9/30/2009
  Q: i really don't know where to start...i've known her through her boyfriend that past away about 8 ...
  A: It is so difficult to feel torn between something we love and the need to do what is right for ...
secret love with bff and now...it's gone9/29/2009
  Q: i really don't know where to start...i've known her through her boyfriend that past away about 8 ...
  A: I think that moving away for a while may very well be a good thing to do, but it is not the most ...
What am I?9/23/2009
  Q: I've spent my life as a heterosexual while I and others laughed and questioned why. My problem is ...
  A: You are not alone! Sexuality is not as one-sided, as some might assume it to be. You may well fall ...
Accused of cheating.9/22/2009
  Q: For the past three months, my girlfriend has had dreams where I was cheating on her. Last month, we ...
  A: Having had a dream about infidelity or having been told by a psychic, are not legitimate reasons to ...
Being rejected9/17/2009
  Q: I am in a tough situation and have been crying all day. In a nutshell- a girl whom I had been ...
  A: Feelings (positive or negative) toward the people in our lives, are seldom constant. They are ...
Lesbian friend and her mom9/16/2009
  Q: I am a 20 years old female of Indian origin living in UK for past 10 uears. I am having a committed ...
  A: What a shameful thing for a mother to do to her daughter! Unfortunately, you are now caught in the ...
Just reeeallly close friends?9/15/2009
  Q: I have this HUUUUGE thing for one of my closest friends (lesbian) and I have NO idea what to do... ...
  A: The first question that enters my mind is: Why is it up to her, to make the first move and all that ...
Is she or isn't she interested?9/10/2009
  Q: I'm into a girl that I've been friends with for a few years. She's aware of my feelings and is okay ...
  A: Sounds like your friend might be confused. She may be feeling attracted to you at times and ...
RE: Living together - First time relationship9/7/2009
  Q: Ok I need some guidance seriously. The facts of my situation are like this - she was involved with ...
  A: but the truth is, it is a real pleasure to read through something when the answers come so clearly. ...
Confused8/26/2009
  Q: I've been with my girlfriend for six years and it's basically gotten to the point where she's called ...
  A: Bickering is sometimes more common in lesbian relationships, because of how emotionally-charged ...
troubled love8/21/2009
  Q: I feel my relationship is on its way out the door. I love my girlfriend very much and know she is a ...
  A: I'm sorry you are so sad. It sounds like your girlfriend is reacting to what she has perceived as ...
not sure8/20/2009
  Q: Lena. I'm in a situation that I'm very confused about! There's this girl that I met about two months ...
  A: In life, as I see it, each one of us is given our fair share of puzzles to solve. The measure of ...
still questioning being gay8/16/2009
  Q: i have came out and i identify myself as a lesbian. i know i have always liked women. it's not even ...
  A: You definitely are in the 'questioning' stage and this is a good place to be. It can however be ...
In love with a lesbian8/9/2009
  Q: (REPOSTED) Hello. I am a 40 yr old married straight woman who has fallen in love with a lesbian. I ...
  A: Yes, absolutely, I see myriad red flags all over the place. Space restrictions may prevent me from ...
I dont know what to do8/8/2009
  Q: I am a 20 year old female. i was raised in a fundamental christian family, who drilled into me all ...
  A: In his research, the Reverend Mel White has included basic explanations, comparing common ...
Confused8/4/2009
  Q: Ive been attracted to this one girl for 5 yrs now well i never would tell her how i felt until just ...
  A: There are about as many different types of 'involvement' between individuals as there are ...
i need help about a girl...8/2/2009
  Q: around 4 years ago i met a girl (let's call her Janice) but i never really developed a friendship ...
  A: You do not say if this would be your first committed relationship. If it is, these things require a ...
my arabic root is killing me8/1/2009
  Q: I am 36 year's old women, who I consider myself bi, have been into several realations in the past, ...
  A: You have been through a lot. Coming from a part of the world where horrible harm can come to you ...
is she lesbian?7/28/2009
  Q: My gf and i have been together for 3 years. when i met her she was dating a man but she told me it ...
  A: For anyone who's reading this, who has 'ever' heard (or used) the excuse for an affair: "I did it ...
my confused girlfriend7/26/2009
  Q: I am currently dating this girl who I adore but am skeptical about her past and if she will cheat on ...
  A: This link might help: http://www.straightspouse.org/home.php. I know you are not married, nor can ...
How can I tell if my wife is gay?7/21/2009
  Q: Long question. I am married 30 years and have 2 children with my wife. About 3 years ago, a friend ...
  A: Lots of women talk for 400 minutes per month to their friends. It is how some women process things. ...
I think my girlfriend is hiding something from me.7/20/2009
  Q: MY girlfriend and I started dating back in November. Things started off great when we first started ...
  A: Trust your instincts! Your instincts are the best guide you have, when something suspicious is ...
Lesbian Flirting7/17/2009
  Q: I've just accepted that I'm a bi-sexual woman. I've been going to a doctors office and the ...
  A: If she's asking for people's phone numbers and then deciding not to call, I'm not one bit surprised ...
Unsure7/9/2009
  Q: There is this woman I met, she is 56 will be 57 this year, I am 47. I remember our first touch, she ...
  A: Wait? For what? As I understand from your letter, it was not implied in any way that she would ...
Confused...7/8/2009
  Q: I'm a 19 year old college student. I realized I was gay about half way through high school but I've ...
  A: I have to say that I kept wanting to fill in whatever was missing from some parts of your letter. ...
My first same-sex relationship7/4/2009
  Q: I'm 22 years old and have been heterosexual my whole life. I've dated a lot of guys, but it's been a ...
  A: OK, I'll help you, but only on one condition -- that you try and seek on-going guidance from others ...
stay or go..7/3/2009
  Q: This is the 2nd year of our relationship. She is my best friend TRULY, I haven't had a close friend ...
  A: Before examining whether you "stay or go" or who you want to be in a relationship with for the rest ...
Leaving Husband for Lesbian Lover6/25/2009
  Q: I recently left my husband and so did my lesbian lover. We just don't know how long to keep our ...
  A: The most important thing as you have so wisely gathered, is telling the children. The question of ...
having a hard time getting over ex6/15/2009
  Q: my ex and i have been broken up for over a year.she has a girlfriend,the same girl she says she ...
  A: Life is a beautiful thing. Don't miss a single moment of it waiting or wondering if someone loves ...
just flirty or more?6/14/2009
  Q: ok so my best friend is bi and i cant tell whether or not she is in to me or if shes just extremely ...
  A: I get this type of question a lot. Signs to look for are: ~ Is she just as flirtatious with other ...
coaching or therapy6/11/2009
  Q: My girlfriend and I will celebrate our second anniversary together in early July, but since last ...
  A: It is just the most wonderful news, that you are seeking counseling! You have elected to embark on ...
co-worker problem6/6/2009
  Q: I need advice. I just recently came out of a secret, 6 year sexual relationship with my best friend ...
  A: Secret relationships are always problematic in many ways. Some people subscribe to the idea that if ...
confusion6/3/2009
  Q: We had a soccer dinner the other night and we ended up kissing and talking about seeing how things ...
  A: She may be reacting to your own uncertainty. No one wants to get seriously involved with someone who ...
My wife is probably gay5/31/2009
  Q: My wife and I have been married for nearly 25 years, we have 4 wonderful children and I believe that ...
  A: You sound like a wonderful, loving, caring man. Any woman would be lucky to have you for a partner. ...
She Knew All Along5/30/2009
  Q: I have been communicating with this female for about a year. I have bought her gifts and we spend a ...
  A: Of course she knows you like her, it is staring her right in the face with every action you take. ...
She Knew All Along5/22/2009
  Q: I have been communicating with this female for about a year. I have bought her gifts and we spend a ...
  A: Well, here’s the thing -- Because other people besides you and me read this column. And because some ...
Lesbian friend wants to keep me in the closet.5/21/2009
  Q: I'm getting out of a six year relationship including a brief marriage to a man and I am now in my ...
  A: It sounds like you’ve had a lot going on and all within the recent past. Showing care and respect ...
confused5/19/2009
  Q: We became friends and on a drunken night out we got together etc and continued from there...we have ...
  A: No need to put undue pressure on yourself. When the time is right, you'll know. You'll also ...
My gf cheated!!5/18/2009
  Q: My gf is in the Army, she has been deployed to Afghanistan for over 6 months now, we have been ...
  A: Recovering from infidelity is painful and it takes time. What you cannot do is allow her ...
Is a woman at work interested in me?5/14/2009
  Q: I'm 34 years old and out. I began working at a new job about 9 months ago. The first moment I laid ...
  A: I’m sure it’s just a matter of time before the two of you are talking up a storm. Jokingly, a ...
Desperate for help.5/13/2009
  Q: I'm 24 years old,I've been straight all my life,up until a year ago,when i met a woman(30 years ...
  A: You tell me the problem is, "not about you labeling yourself." Labeling or not, it most certainly ...
Does my mother suspect I'm hiding something with my girlfriend?5/12/2009
  Q: I'm in a relationship right now, so far everything seems fine between us from what I see. Although ...
  A: While you sit, wondering if your mother suspects; gather as much information as possible in the ...
coaching or therapy5/11/2009
  Q: My girlfriend and I will celebrate our second anniversary together in early July, but since last ...
  A: We can't help who we're drawn to or who we fall in love with, we can however, make a conscious ...
confused/stay or go?5/9/2009
  Q: I recently came out(about a year ago). I was totally in love with someone who was my friend and ...
  A: My question to you is: Do you love the person you are with? If not, why stay? You have to deal with ...
My lesbian relationship5/8/2009
  Q: I've been with my girlfriend for two years now and this has been a difficult two years for our ...
  A: Few people are capable of achieving relationship bliss by jumping into a new relationship, while ...
Confused5/2/2009
  Q: I've read many of the questions and answers about the "am I a lesbian?" theme and I think I fall ...
  A: Having read previous responses, you seem to have become aware that no two cases are alike. Also, ...
how do I tell my deeply religious kids that I'm gay?4/30/2009
  Q: I have been losing sleep over my predicament--I was hoping you could help. I am 38, was married for ...
  A: The intersection between religion and homosexuality presents a dilemma that is becoming increasingly ...
Online dating... Does the girl like me?4/22/2009
  Q: I'm 21 years old and met a girl online she is also 21 and on our 1st date we really seemed to hit ...
  A: The first question I want to address is: “How often should I call her without coming off as too ...
no idea4/10/2009
  Q: I have met a straight women for a year now, she has been divorce twice and right now she has a ...
  A: This woman must really be something. She’s got her mom, sister, kid; tiptoeing around her to try and ...
questioning4/8/2009
  Q: So, I have always considered myself to be straight, but this year i went to college and ended up on ...
  A: In my humble opinion, people spend entirely too much time and energy worrying about the what ifs and ...
I'm in love with my straight friend4/5/2009
  Q: I live in Honduras, people here have a very close mind..so they do not look at gay relationships. ...
  A: Progress - not perfection - is what its about. I realize you may be impatient and that your picture ...
dating a mom & coming out to my mom3/28/2009
  Q: I just got out of a serious relationship/affair with a partnered woman that lasted about 9 ...
  A: As I stated in my previous response: "It is unfair to get involved with another person till you have ...
how do I talk to a girl I when I'm shy3/26/2009
  Q: I like this girl at my school but I am too shy to talk to her, like I can't even go up to her to ...
  A: Immature or not, is a matter of opinion. What defines immature is up to the person doing the ...
I'm in love with my straight friend3/23/2009
  Q: I live in Honduras, people here have a very close mind..so they do not look at gay relationships. ...
  A: Tell her! Go ahead and tell her you like her as more than a friend. Seriously. She sounds like she’s ...
friends not accepting new relationship3/14/2009
  Q: Awhile back I just recently moved from Minnesota all the way to New York to be with a woman I met ...
  A: Whenever the topic of limits involving friends comes up, I often share with people, that for those ...
Potential Date3/12/2009
  Q: Ok so this is my first time asking this question on one of these things so please if I'm doing this ...
  A: The only person who would know if she is a lesbian or not, is she, herself. So you have to take her ...
Falling For The Straight Friend3/10/2009
  Q: Okay, so I've been down this road, and I'm sure almost every lesbian has at least once...falling for ...
  A: In this age of disposable cyber-friends and blind dates, we tend to meet more people, more often and ...
Coming out3/3/2009
  Q: I am not sure how to start this email but I will give it try and hope it makes sense. Iam 30 ...
  A: Occasionally, I read articles like Newsweek’s, ‘Gay Families Coming Out’ and I hear stories about ...
Help..i love this girl but shes too far away3/1/2009
  Q: well...ive been into girls for a long time, a different girl turned me into a bi...or lesbian im not ...
  A: To your first remark - nobody "turns" you gay or bi or anything you are not and don't want to be. In ...
will she come back to me2/25/2009
  Q: we broke up about two weeks ago there has been no contact since but i contacted her to get together ...
  A: If I could see into the future, I might be able to let you know whether your girlfriend will be ...
how do I fix this?2/23/2009
  Q: I have been with my girlfriend for almost a year. At the beginning we were great, we were intimate, ...
  A: "Backing off a little," sounds like an excellent idea. Communication is key, in any relationship. ...
I have a crush on my friend and she doesnt know2/20/2009
  Q: I'm 19 and I move from Boston, Ma, to Honduras (central america). People here are very close minded, ...
  A: A new-found crush can be so titillating. Yet if any of us knew what awaits us in its wake, ...
Is it time to let go of my relationshp?2/19/2009
  Q: I have been with my girlfriend for 2yrs & 8mo, and have live together for all except 6mo of that ...
  A: Why are you leaving it up to her to make all the decisions? I'll pause here... and allow you a few ...
just broke up with my first girlfriend and i want her back!!!2/11/2009
  Q: My first girlfriend of four months just broke up with me stating that she felt there was something ...
  A: Though it is natural to want to stop the pain of a breakup by convincing the other person to take us ...
Am I a lesbian or am I asexual?2/10/2009
  Q: I know this sounds like a weird thing to ask, but I have been a bit confused about my sexual ...
  A: No one can answer for you the question of whether you are a lesbian or not. You must answer this for ...
I told my straight friend I loved her2/9/2009
  Q: I have been best friends with this girl for the past three years. We worked closely together, lived ...
  A: This is one of those instances where once the toothpaste is out of the container, there's no forcing ...
girlfriend and Marijuana2/8/2009
  Q: My partner Isabella and I have been together for 3 years. We have talked about having a future ...
  A: One therapist I know refuses to see patients who are active in their addictions. She says they ...
Just how much time heals all wounds?2/7/2009
  Q: I've been dating a married woman for 2 years. Her husband knows. I've met him. I'm her first. She ...
  A: Initiate a plan for no contact under any circumstances, immediately -period! Do whatever it takes. ...
Keep going or end realtionship?1/31/2009
  Q: My partner and I have been together 2 and half years. This spring we will ce;celebrate our 3rd ...
  A: Try and stay in touch with 'yourself' throughout this process. You're putting all your energy into ...
Should I speak up?1/30/2009
  Q: Apologies for the length of this before I start. I'm in a LDR and have been for approx 5 years, I do ...
  A: Your relationship with your girlfriend and with this other woman have to be placed in separate ...
Broken Heart!1/29/2009
  Q: .. I do have a question but I think it's important to give a quick background. I am 21 and my ex is ...
  A: You may be exactly correct when you say she is just "scared and confused." It certainly sounds like ...
Do I tell her?1/28/2009
  Q: hey, I was just wondering about something. First I'd like to let you know that I'm a teenager. ...
  A: You don't refer to any specific examples of how (for instance) "she flirts back" so I will have to ...
moving on..1/27/2009
  Q: I could really use some advice. Here is my problem. My now ex gf and I have known each other for 6 ...
  A: As painful as it seems, "moving on" is precisely what you must do at this time. Supportive friends ...
how to make it work?1/18/2009
  Q: alright, well i got out of a relationship awhile ago. it was the hardest one i've ever been in and ...
  A: When we have been through difficult circumstances, part of us hesitates upon embarking on another ...
Hard choice1/17/2009
  Q: Torres, I have a bit of a situation that I would be grateful for your insight and input in. I have ...
  A: Absolutely, telling them 'both' what your intentions are, would be best. If you have nothing to ...
Can't tell how my bff feels?1/14/2009
  Q: I have been best friends with a girl for over two years. We seem to have an unusually close bond ...
  A: Your friend's behavior sounds like that of dozens of women I've heard from. Women simultaneously ...
i fell for a straight girl...i think1/8/2009
  Q: This past summer I realized that I had feelings for someone that has been in my life for about 12 ...
  A: As I read your story, I'm reminded of another letter from someone who's foundation for always being ...
an ex that wont let go1/6/2009
  Q: About two months ago I got out of this relationship that lasted for four years. When we broke up it ...
  A: Clearly, your ex is not respecting your boundaries. I suggest you let her know immediately that if ...
I'm in love with my straight best friend- what can I do??1/2/2009
  Q: Here is the situation: I am in love with a girl that has been my best friend for the last 1 and a ...
  A: I would be cautious and remain focused on the fact that she has cheated twice on someone she was in ...
My Lesbian/Bi Wife12/23/2008
  Q: first off thank god for this site...I have sent so many emails to sites only to find that they ...
  A: Your wife is very lucky. You are a very understanding guy. For me, kissing another person (of any ...
My Lesbian/Bi Wife12/22/2008
  Q: first off thank god for this site...I have sent so many emails to sites only to find that they ...
  A: I'm sorry that you had to find out about her possible lesbianism in such an abrupt way. She might be ...
how can i be more confident?12/21/2008
  Q: I'm a 14 years old girl. I like girls, I've like them since i was really young. I'm boyish i dress ...
  A: It would be great if we could all waive a magic wand that would instantly render us more confident. ...
i need help...12/11/2008
  Q: Ok... I have an issue. Well I'm a lesbian and I'm newly single... and now I've developed a crush... ...
  A: Given the fact that you say, if (you) ever... made her uncomfortable around you, "it would kill ...
married for 15 years and now decides she is a lesbian12/8/2008
  Q: My friend has been married over 15 yars and has 5 children with the same husband. A month ago she ...
  A: No one just suddenly “decides” she is a lesbian. Now that your friend is making a difficult life ...
I don't want to lose her.12/2/2008
  Q: Sorry but this is going to be a long post. Three days ago I posted this message on a forum, just to ...
  A: One cannot bring to a relationship what one does not have for oneself. It is imperative that a ...
Dating a woman with a 6 yr old boy12/1/2008
  Q: I have been dating this woman for about 7 months now and I can say with certainty that it is a ...
  A: Seven months is very early in a relationship. You did not say if you are living together or not. You ...
ex gf issues11/30/2008
  Q: I am writing to you because I'm in a weird situation. I'm sorry for the length of it! I'm 16 and in ...
  A: There is no easy way to decipher a person's true intentions, when truth fluctuates from day to day. ...
am I gay11/26/2008
  Q: So, I have been married to a man for 12 years and we have three children together. Our relationship ...
  A: The first thing to consider here is do you want to stay in your marriage? That decision should be ...
How can I tell if she is a Lesbian? How can I tell her I like her?11/25/2008
  Q: Okay so there is this girl that I really like. And the thing is that I actually like her for her ...
  A: I mostly got the idea that you are special to her too, from the exchange you had the day when you ...
How can I tell if she is a Lesbian? How can I tell her I like her?11/25/2008
  Q: Okay so there is this girl that I really like. And the thing is that I actually like her for her ...
  A: It is rare that I hear someone express that they like/love someone for what comes across as, all the ...
lisbian and gay11/24/2008
  Q: For last 3 hours I am trying to find out what causes one being lesbian or gay but failed as it seems ...
  A: The only legitimate response I can give to this question is that the answer depends on two factors. ...
Feelings11/23/2008
  Q: Since high school I have felt that I am attracted to girls, and this past year my best friend ...
  A: You asked her and she answered. She "does not feel the same way." It is great that she is supportive ...
Is it wrong..10/19/2008
  Q: Do you think it is wrong for me to want to tell my friends I'm a lesbian though I have never had any ...
  A: How does a person come to decide that they would want to take part in a lesbian sexual encounter? I ...
getting over her10/16/2008
  Q: I have been spening time with this girl but she is confused and is playing a little game of push and ...
  A: Pay attention to the fact that she has said she is “confused” because that is key. You also have to ...
Open Relationship10/15/2008
  Q: I'm 19, in college, and have been with my girlfriend for 7 months. I am very much in love with her ...
  A: You are making the mature choice by making college a priority at this time. It is also commendable ...
Is my wife a lesbian after 14 years of marriage?10/1/2008
  Q: My wife and I have been married for 14 years. She has never been passionate about sex between us. ...
  A: Telling you: "it was the best sex she ever had" is unacceptable in any context - but even more so, ...
Caring for someone I cant have9/30/2008
  Q: Well, I just got of a three year relationship four months ago and i have developed very strong ...
  A: Give it time. Both of you are healing from your respective past relationships. When you're ...
New girlfriend... am I being too needy?9/29/2008
  Q: I'm a 19 year old lesbian college student and I've been dating another 19 year old girl who lives ...
  A: I don't think it is a sign of dominance in a relationship, to initiate activities. One thing I ...
Are my lesbian fantasies going to ruin our relationship?9/28/2008
  Q: I'm 19. I've been with my boyfriend for just over a year. We were close friends for 6 years before ...
  A: Your question might be re-framed to read: Is my hope of being in a straight relationship, going to ...
married with child9/24/2008
  Q: Okay, I don't even know what order to tell this in, so I'm just going to blurt things out. I'm ...
  A: First, I hope you have taken a serious look at the weblink in my previous reply. I say that ...
confused about relationship9/24/2008
  Q: I was wondering if u cud help me. i have just started college and have never been in a relationship ...
  A: Finding someone that you have a real connection with and experiencing all those feelings can be ...
how do i move on when i'm still in love with her9/22/2008
  Q: i was recently in a very serious relationship with my g/f who i had been with for over 7 months. we ...
  A: One of the most difficult responsibilities we have as adults, is that we are obligated to take the ...
married with child9/22/2008
  Q: Okay, I don't even know what order to tell this in, so I'm just going to blurt things out. I'm ...
  A: First let me just say that there are tons of women (literally tons) out there in your exact shoes. ...
Sexual attraction from straight women9/20/2008
  Q: Ok...now there is place that i usually go to & have a few drinks with friends here & there..it's ...
  A: She is not available. That is the one thing you have to know about her. Period. The more important ...
questioning9/20/2008
  Q: hey lena i've been questioning my sexuality for two months and i've also had mild HOCD for the past ...
  A: Looking up to someone is normal. We all have an inferiority complex to some degree. Don't beat ...
Sexual attraction from straight women9/19/2008
  Q: Ok...now there is place that i usually go to & have a few drinks with friends here & there..it's ...
  A: Before I say anything else, I feel the need to express my deep disapproval about the use of the word ...
Great gf vs not so good ex?9/16/2008
  Q: It has been offically about year and a half ( but about a year with no contact). I am currently in a ...
  A: Some people seem to trigger an attachment that others do not. This has a lot to do with what is ...
questioning9/15/2008
  Q: hey lena i've been questioning my sexuality for two months and i've also had mild HOCD for the past ...
  A: Since you mention the HOCD, I'll cater my response taking this into consideration. Hence, I'll ...
lesbian9/13/2008
  Q: im a lesbian i kno this. i been with my girlfriend for 6 months. should i feel guilt and upset for ...
  A: How you feel is, how you feel. You are entitled to your reality. Nonetheless, in relationships, we ...
I have no idea what I'm doing.9/13/2008
  Q: I really don't know what my question is. I feel like I'm just stuck in my life. I feel like I don't ...
  A: Those who do not live in or near a large metropolitan area, find it helpful to join on-line groups ...
28 yr age span9/12/2008
  Q: My girlfriend and I are 28 years apart. Her being 23 and me being the older one. We feel so ...
  A: Enjoy every minute you spend together. No need to worry about any other time but the present. What ...
I have no idea what I'm doing.9/12/2008
  Q: I really don't know what my question is. I feel like I'm just stuck in my life. I feel like I don't ...
  A: Coming to terms with being a lesbian does not require having personal relationships with other ...
In love with a married woman.9/11/2008
  Q: I am a 39 year old lesbian, who thought l was in a happy relationship, that was until one evening ...
  A: The best success story I have ever heard, under these circumstances, was one where the gay partner ...
She says she's straight8/21/2008
  Q: I feel quite nervous asking all this, so sorry, in advance, if I end up waffling. I'm 23. I met this ...
  A: The feeling of a heart, breaking just aches all over doesn’t it? I can hear the desperation in your ...
Don't understand this relationship8/21/2008
  Q: I started online dating a girl this past January. We live several states apart. She was getting out ...
  A: Sadly, the world is full of this kind of deception and it is so easy for a trusting, sensitive ...
Selfish ways8/20/2008
  Q: When I met my girlfriend, she was the most kind, considerate, caring person I had ever known. It's ...
  A: What you and your girlfriend need most is to communicate. If your relationship is salvageable and ...
Interfearing house mate8/19/2008
  Q: We were three friends. But then two of us started dating. my GF and out mutual friend/problem flat ...
  A: What stands out to me, is that you say "you have a house." You also said that (at one point) the ...
Painful breakup8/18/2008
  Q: Not sure that I should write this, but then again - I'm not sure of much at the moment. My ...
  A: The first thing I want to say is 'you are not pathetic." I believe words have power and once you use ...
Don't understand this relationship8/18/2008
  Q: I started online dating a girl this past January. We live several states apart. She was getting out ...
  A: Bi-Polar or Borderline Personality Disorder can be possible explanations for very similar behavior ...
wat do i do?8/17/2008
  Q: all right hi im 15 i just became a freshman. and i like this junior,and shes bi...i just found that ...
  A: OK, so there’s a sure-shot way that you can get her to "notice you" like, right now! But she will ...
wat do i do?8/16/2008
  Q: all right hi im 15 i just became a freshman. and i like this junior,and shes bi...i just found that ...
  A: I think it is great that you like her and you have all the information you need to take the leap of ...
My girlfriend wants space and I can't handle all this8/16/2008
  Q: My name's Isabelle and so.. I have been in a relationship with my now ex gf Tonilee for 5 months and ...
  A: There are two people in this relationship and you each get a choice. Regardless of how things were ...
Relationship Question8/12/2008
  Q: at the age of 46, I fell for a married friend. Both of us in long-term, abusive relationships. ...
  A: When it comes to the question of time, everyone seems to approach the process differently. Some ...
Relationship Question8/9/2008
  Q: at the age of 46, I fell for a married friend. Both of us in long-term, abusive relationships. ...
  A: First, thank you for allowing me the opportunity to address the of subject GBLT domestic violence. ...
How to react?8/7/2008
  Q: I am very educated and pro equality. For that reason I do not differentiate between men and women ...
  A: Men and women (or gay and straight, for that matter), are not that different from one another. ...
I've fallen for someone's partner.8/7/2008
  Q: Lena.I have something in my heart that is going to explore.I've fallen for a gay woman who is 9 ...
  A: Look - no matter how you slice it, the key component here that cannot be ignored is - She is in a ...
Lesbian girlfriend8/6/2008
  Q: I met an incrediable women almost an year and a half ago. I can tell you the very moment I knew I ...
  A: Here you are - waiting - for a year and a half no less. I realize that you say she is "amazing" and ...
I have a very unsupportive family and don't know what to do.8/4/2008
  Q: I’m in a bit of a jam. I don’t know what I am. I’m either Bi, or a Lesbian. I know my mother hates ...
  A: I hope you realize, that you do have options. Your sister is - no doubt, an annoyance - but telling ...
My Baby8/2/2008
  Q: My daughter is a lesbian and all I want for her is happiness. I want be who she is. The problem I ...
  A: You seem to keep trying to answer the question of: "How did this happen?" As if it were some sort of ...
i need her back7/31/2008
  Q: hey how you doing i need help..me and my girl was perfect last week i mean we was so happy nothing ...
  A: What happened? She has to answer that question herself. You cannot draw your own conclusions on ...
I've fallen for someone's partner.7/30/2008
  Q: Lena.I have something in my heart that is going to explore.I've fallen for a gay woman who is 9 ...
  A: You've made it very clear, both to me and to "Kay" that you are attracted to her. You have invited ...
In DEEP love with a girl7/29/2008
  Q: I'm 17 years old and met a girl that i play football with and I knew that it was something about ...
  A: Suicide is a - "permanent solution, to a temporary problem" - It is NEVER, the answer. I know of one ...
Jenny's back at it...7/27/2008
  Q: l posted a couple of question on this site and Michele was very helpful.And lam sure you will be ...
  A: So, I read your first couple of sentences and stopped and thought - no matter what else this letter ...
confused in Dating7/27/2008
  Q: I met a girl online and we had our 1st date at her home even though I wanted to take her out. We ...
  A: You say that you spent the first date at her home even though, you "wanted to go out." It sounds as ...
im confused7/27/2008
  Q: My name is laura iv just turned 19, iv always wanted to become a man, loose my breasts but keep my ...
  A: Yours is a difficult predicament to be in. While your partner understands your preference for women ...

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Lena Torres

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Expertise

Can Answer Questions about Lesbian Life: Dating, Relationships, Breakups, Cheating and Every day life. Prefer not to Respond to: Intricate Psychological Disorder questions (though I can refer readers to other resources i.e. websites/counceling for information and help on these issues). No questions with sexual content, especially from under-age readers.

Experience

Worked within the domestic violence field, assisting victims to get their lives back on track; through facilitating support-groups, workshops and individual counceling. Continue to be an active member of the lesbian community, providing referals and support to fellow lesbians through church and other groups.

Organizations
FVS (domestic violence group in Florida) and various church groups.

Education/Credentials
B.A. in Journalism, with heavy research concentration in Social Psychology and Human Relations. Working toward Masters.

Awards and Honors
Received commendation award for public relations work and teamwork/unity and team-leadership awards within a corporate setting.

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