AboutMargot RN BScN CGN Expertise I nursed my own Mother and Grandmother at home when they were dying so I have personal experience with the emotions involved. I have also spent the last 15+ years as a Registered Nurse caring for The Elderly and Terminally Ill and it has brought me great satisfaction. I am willing to answer any questions I can.
Experience
Past/Present clients Hundreds of Long Term Care Residents as well as hundreds of Cleitns and families in the community (including my Mother and Grandmother).
Question Yes My Mom found out about having liver cancer a little over a year ago. They told her that treatment would not cure anything just prolong it. She went through kemo for several months.About two or three months ago she found out that it had gone to her lungs also and the kemo was not doing anything. She stoped kemo and has been on oxegen since. I know hospice comes in 3 times a week now but Im not sure how long it has been since they started coming. She does not like to tell me much I think because I am out of state about 9 hours away and have landed a great job I dont thinkshe wants me to worry or quit to help her
but I need some real info. She had a mild stroke in her sleep 3 days ago. Hospice says that it sometimes happens with the body begining to shut down. In your opinion can you give me a realistic idea of how much longer she may have. I want to be there for her but not to sound insensitive I also need to worry about my future also I am 24 and have to support myself but I also want to be there for her.
Answer Hi Brandi and thanks for writing,
I'm sorry to hear about your Mom. This is always a difficult question to answer, and every family asks it "when should I be there"?
I always advise "come now". The reason I say this is it's better to visit now while you can have some quality time with your Mom, if you wait until "the end" you may not make it in time, or even if you do, she may not even know you're there. Go now and have a visit, it may be your last visit, or you may have another in the future, but why gamble? It's really hard to guess "how long" any one has, I have seen so many people defy the odds and last much longer than prognosed, and of course others slip away suddenly.
