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Question QUESTION: My situation is, i have been with my man for five years, I've seen him go through his ups and downs and I always stood by him, about our third year together we moved in 2gether but then that following year moved out apart, but still being a couple, at the present moment I feel like our relationship is going no where, sometimes he gives me the impression he don't want to be with me, like we don't spend any time, together, we have sex maybe twice a month and I told him I love him last week and its been a while since I said it to him and he didn't even respond back to it, I mean he calls me everyday, but seem to don't want to be affectionate with me, its like he rather talk to me on the phone and it hurts me bad and then I approach him about it time after time, it this is his way of making up, if I say something about us not spending time 2gether, he will come over spend time with me that day or night and then the following week go right back to not wanting to spend anytime with me until I fuss about it again. Please give me some advice, em I complaining about nothing or do it seem as if my man is getting bored with this relationship, even though I try all the time to make it fun loving relationship by giving him his space, i don't nag him about anything.
ANSWER: he's obviously lost interest, and your needs aren't being met; time to INFORM him that the current situation is no longer acceptable and needs to change, or you're out; you can start by getting his attention by communicating less, being busy if he asks to see you, etc; when he asks what the problem is, you tell him what your requirements for continuing are that aren't being met; if he refuses to considerately address your concerns, with not just words but real behavior changes, then you're with the wrong guy..
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QUESTION: i know you probably can't answer for him, but why do you think he would lead me on like this instead of just coming out and telling me he not interest in me, the relationship or even going as far as lying to me to get out of the relationship instead of hurting me like he do everyday, and thats just the thing, I say it to him all the time and he changes that one day and go back to his old habit of not spending time with me, maybe its me as a person he has lost interest in!! thanks again for the advice.
Answer probably because the relationship is still of some partial value to him, but you should ask HIM the question; whatever the reason, it's not the important part--what IS, is your letting him know that the situation is no longer acceptable; you don't want to waste any more time in a relationship that you may soon realize (like today) has been over for a long time...
