Question Hi Azure,
I'm 16 years old and I am from the south. About 8 months ago I met someone online. He is 20 years old and he is my everything. It's difficult because he goes to school up north and we have yet to meet physically. My parents has no idea about this because I know they will not approve and most likely ban me from speaking to him. It's hard being in a relationship like this because all I want is to be able to touch him. But I also don't want to give up on our relationship. We want to visit each other but because of the age thing he wants to wait until I'm 18. The other night we were talking and he mentioned the strain of long distance. And that no matter how much we think we will be perfect together physically it may be awkward and horrible. I told him that while that's true it could also be better than we ever expected. He also said that he needs to be with me physically. We planned on meeting this month but school has him so busy he couldn't fly out. I really don't want to give up I love him so much. He is my best friend and we talk about everything together. I understand him needing something physical because I do too. And we both want it together. I just need some advice on how to make it work. I want to just fly up there and visit him but my parents don't know like I said. I guess I just wish I was 18 and living on my own. Then this relationship could work so much better. But I will not give up on us because I really am completely in love with him. So please don't tell me to just give up. I need someone to talk to because no one knows what I'm going through. Thank you so muh for taking the time to read this!
Answer we can talk about it if you like, but don't expect much to change from how it is now; just keep in mind that all you have are words, which doesn't exactly make for a secure, stable relationship..at 20, most guys are ready/willing/able to have sex with whoever might be interested--now you have all your emotions wrapped in a dream that could be gone tomorrow...not to mention that you have to deceive your mom to keep it goin..bottom line, a risky adventure that could prove costly...
expertise: over 3000 questions answered...B.A. Psychology Bates College;graduate study, Fordham Univ. School Social Work; technical editor, "dating for dummies", by dr joy browne; thoughtful consideration of your question, then insightful advice about love,romance and related issues given in an objective, non-judgmental manner...over 20 years of personal experience in both short and long term relationships...longer term consultations are available uponrequest...life experience: personal involvement in many relationships where issues of love, sex, intimacy, trust, etc., had to be dealt with and resolved...just having "experiences", however, isn`t enough...it`s the thoughtful reflection upon and analysis of what happened and why, that leads to learning and enlightenment...so tell me what`s on your mind and i`ll try to help, or tell you if i can`t...thanks