Long Distance Relationships/Do stuff or not?


Dear Azure I am in a Long Distance Relationship currently for 32 months but have known each other for 4 and half years now. He lives in Canada and I live in the USA we are planning to meet this summer for the very first time :) Right now it has come to our attention and worrying us a little that maybe we should like do stuff with other people. He has had time to sort of go out and be wild in his high school life and I haven't. I am struggling with should I go out and do stuff or not? I love him soooo much with all of my heart and really when people say that they have their soul mate and their perfect they are just lying compared to him. Feeling that way it is hard to go out and do stuff without feeling guilty. Apart of me does while apart of me doesn't. He doesn't want to go out and do stuff at all. Which I am happy about but than leaves me hurting him if I do something. But I also don't want to do anything at all. I think it the pressure of friends getting to me at the moment too. Him and I have both herd from people that it is better to be wild and free in high school because in the future you will be more likely to cheat. Is that true? Should we both go out and do stuff? Or should we both just keep being the way we are now :)?

in my opinion these long distance arrangements that you call a relationship, are just emotionally unhealthy fantasies; all you have are words--people learn about each other by IN PERSON interaction, by observing how people act in different situations; then, your friends are out having "real world" fun, and you're hung up on a computer, dependent on a dream; thusly, you should have been goin out/dating, LONG AGO; it has nothing to do with cheating, it's to avoid the huge regret you'll have years from now when this is over and you wish you did it all differently; your youthful years go by fast--stop wasting them...

Long Distance Relationships

All Answers

Answers by Expert:

Ask Experts




expertise: over 3000 questions answered...B.A. Psychology Bates College;graduate study, Fordham Univ. School Social Work; technical editor, "dating for dummies", by dr joy browne; thoughtful consideration of your question, then insightful advice about love,romance and related issues given in an objective, non-judgmental manner...over 20 years of personal experience in both short and long term relationships...longer term consultations are available uponrequest...life experience: personal involvement in many relationships where issues of love, sex, intimacy, trust, etc., had to be dealt with and resolved...just having "experiences", however, isn`t enough...it`s the thoughtful reflection upon and analysis of what happened and why, that leads to learning and enlightenment...so tell me what`s on your mind and i`ll try to help, or tell you if i can`t...thanks


see above

©2017 About.com. All rights reserved.