Expert: Courtney Floyd - 4/7/2009

Question
Well yesterday my boyfriend and I attempted to have sex and it didn't go well. I was on top of him in bed and when he was going in It hurt soo much. I almost started to cry from the pain and he only had a little bit more than the head in me. My boyfriend's penis is larger than average but I figured it would be okay. I couldn't go on through the pain so I got off him and sat on the bed. I then realized that I was bleeding ... a lot. i smeared the bed sheets and my panties. My boyfriend freaked out at the blood but I knew what had happened so I cleaned up the bed and myself. After I realized he was still in the restroom cleaning himself. He freaked out a lot more than I expected anyone to freak out when he knew what was going to happen. We didn't use a condom so I don't know if he freaked out more because of that too or what but I feel really stupid right now. Afterwards it was kind of awkward at first but it was semi-normal when he left. But is it going to hurt like that always or just because he broke the hymn? He says he doesn't want to do anything anymore if I bleed next time, is it possible that I will bleed then too? And it's been bothering me, Is his reaction normal?

Answer
First off, it is unlikely you will bleed again, but possible. However I can promise, although it won't be AS bad, it will still cause some discomfort for the next few times. It sounds to be like he handled the situation very immaturely. Of course you're going to bleed when you lose your virginity, it's NATURAL. AND to say that he won't do it if you bleed again is also immature because some people actually prefer sex during a womans menstration due to her sensitivity. The awkwardness is normal as well. Don't worry, the first time is always the worst, but I would suggest you reevaluate your situation and take some time to consider if your boyfriend is taking this as seriously as you are. The person you are having sex with should be understanding, and patient with you. :) As for his reaction, well scientifically I can not say what normal is to abnormal, but to put it simply... if you didn't like what he said then it's not normal. Let me know how things go for you!

And congradulations on becoming a woman!