Male Masturbation/Son's masturbation


QUESTION: I am a single mother to a 15 year old son. My son and I have an open relationship and we discuss issues related to sex quite openly. Recently I found out that my son has a habit of masturbating in the prone position. I caught him a few times doing this. So I decided to talk to him. He told me that he can masturbate in the prone position only. He is unable to stimulate himself to orgasm using just his hands and lubrication. He needs the pressure or the hardness of a bed or a pillow to stimulate his penis to reach ejaculation. I am a bit concerned about this as I have heard that males can become anorgasmic if they masturbate in the prone position and may even be unable to enjoy sex later on in life. Is there any way my son can overcome this habit?

ANSWER: You are correct.  Prone masturbation is a cause of orgasmic difficulties in males.  Most males who masturbate prone (lying face down and thrusting the penis into or against something) develop severe sexual dysfunctions, like erectile dysfunction and delayed ejaculation.

It is pretty easy to get over masturbating prone.  Most males simply abstain from ejaculating for about a week, after which they will be able to masturbate to orgasm by hand.  You can learn more about prone masturbation and how to overcome it at

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QUESTION: I did have a long chat with my son after your reply where I explained to him the dangers of masturbating in the prone position and also showed him the website you gave me. But he says that it is difficult for him to imagine any other way of masturbating and instead asked me if I could teach him to do it. By 'teach him' I am sure my son meant that I should give him some sort of physical stimulation to help him to ejaculate. Although I am worried about his future sexual health I don't know how far I should take this issue.

Don't show him or otherwise give him physical stimulation.  You might tell him that over 90 percent of males masturbate by stroking up and down the penis with one hand.  You might also find one or more videos online that you find tasteful enough to share with him.  There are non-porn sites that have demonstration videos like that.  Would he willing to discuss this with a friend?  Nearly all of the boys his age masturbate and nearly all of them masturbate the conventional way.

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Doug Adams, Ph.D.


I write from the point of view that masturbation is normal, healthy, and fun, and even necessary to sexual health. I am able to answer questions in all areas of sexuality.


I am the author of the web site and have been answering questions about sexuality (especially masturbation) from both males and females for over 13 years.

I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading educational institutions of the world.

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