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Hello, I want to tell you something and hopefully you can help me.
Some background info - I am a 28yo male, married for a couple of years and have been suffering on and off from depression for a good few years. Most of my depression is related to me and my personality. I should try to explain a bit more. I have always been a quiet and shy person. I get on well with pretty much anyone but I dont have any close friends, even among members of my family who I rarely see. I guess at times I feel lonely and would like to be more 'normal' (you probably hate that word but there it is). The situation is probably not helped by my wife working out of the country during the week and only back at weekends. Lately I have tried to be a bit more sociable with my work friends and also my wifes sister and her partner (just together, not married or engaged). I have been to see a counseller to talk about my depression and other issues for a few weeks. This week was a very tough week, I think things just got on top of me a bit too much - being lonely, cold weather, wife away etc.. and a bad week in work. On one of the evenings, my wifes sister came round for a cup of tea and a chat and I guess she could see something wasnt quite right with me and was asking questions. I guess I was at a particularly low point so I blurted out everything about how I had been feeling lately etc... and had a bit of a cry. My wifes sister offered me a hug which is just what i needed. However, as we separated, I kissed her. Im not really too sure what happened next, I think she was just surprised and caught offguard really while I apologised. Im not sure how long she stayed before getting a taxi, might have been 5mins or 30mins, its all a blur. Since then I have thought of nothing else. It's probably not helped by the fact that I find my sister in law very attractive and I think about her quite a bit while masturbating during the week/in shower etc... Ive even fantasised about her wearing her bridesmaid's dress for me. I guess all of this has me more confused than ever!
What do you think about my situation?


You placed yourself in a complex situation. This will  be hard but you are committed to your wife and you need to talk to her what transpired between you and her sister. As you this, talk to her how you have been feeling.  What your experiencing sounds like infatuation. Do not let your heart deceive you in exploring this route. Open up the channels of communication with her immediately and if you can, have her go along with you to your sessions. She will get insight to your situation and help you. You need to do this immediately before the single flame turns into a forest fire. Be at peace.



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All questions can be answered as long as the inquirer is willing to assess him or her self and be willing to make an informed decision. I will offer suggestions if its a broad question; however, should one provide a specific question, the a tailored answer will be offered. I'm here to help and am willing to walk you through any marital situation you may have.


I have bee married and divorced. I have a family of six which two of my children are from previous spouses. I have been a mediator, hostage negotiator and handle many family crisis situations from verbal abuse to physical attacks. All have been resolved amicably because I am willing to listen which is a major component in any resolution. I have been assisting and facilitating various culturals dealing with marriages for over 20 years.

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I have a Masters in Criminal Forensic Psychology and over twenty years of marital mediation and family solutions.

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