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Marriage/Should I marry her?


I love her so much. I am ready to marry her and spend the rest of my life with her. But she told me recently that she has a baby. I have always dreamed and fantasized of marrying a virgin. Now, not only is she not a virgin, but she has been pregnant and delivered of a baby boy. Should I go ahead and marry her or just call off the relationship? Thank u.

everyone has a past,with that being said,if you truly love her and want a life with her,her not being a virgin should not be a reason not to cherish her as ur soulmate.You were going to marry her and you loved her until you found out she isn't a virgin, she's still the same girl you fell in love with;You are setting up unrealistic expectations of perfection. Its not her, its you. So she had sex. So what? If you love her you should accept her mistakes and faults and move on and live happily ever after with her and her child,to not do so is selfish in my don't matter what she did in her past just love her for who she is
Well obviously when you met her and fell in love with her she was special. Why isn't she now just because she's had sex? I mean people make mistakes and they learn from them that doesn't mean they are pigs. Plus, I mean I don't know her beliefs or how religious she may be, but maybe she's talked to god and been forgiven?? But I mean do you really think the girl you fell for is worthy or not worthy of ur love? That's just obsurd to me. But if you really don't love her then don't marry her. You shouldn't marry someone you don't love, but I definately think you need to sit down and talk to her again about your beliefs and how you feel about finding out this information about her. If your reaction to the woman you are supposed to love is that, "she isn't special," just because she had relationships and made choices BEFORE she was even dating you..then do her a favor and definitely break it off. You're clearly not ready to be in a marriage and she deserves to be with a man who loves her unconditionally. be true to yourself and her,only u know know what will or will not bring u happiness.So you mean to tell me that you are not going to marry this girl whom you say you love because you just found out that she isn't a virgin. That is down right stupid, she could be the woman of your dreams and you don't wanna marry her because she's not a virgin.So what you need to do is go back and check your priorities, because it sounds like to me if you can't truly love someone which includes overlooking their flaws, then you don't need to marry anybody.don't care who u meet,everyone has a past,including u.certainly not telling you that you should marry her or not, but I would step back and evaluate the situation and give yourself some time. If you were really prepared to marry this girl for the RIGHT reasons ... there should be more to base your relationship on that whether or not she is virgin. I guess a lot of what is prompting me to say this is that, when couples go through premarital counseling, there are often sensitive issues to discuss. One important thing that any responsible counselor will urge each person to remember is that, whether you have committed the same sin(s) as your intended spouse or not, we have ALL committed sins and have ALL been in need of forgiveness. Extend the same grace to the one you love that God has extended us in His mercy. I'm not saying that you have to marry her if that is not what you believe you should do, but you SHOULD realize that we have all sinned and not think yourself too far above her and condemn her in the process.Pray about it first, and if you decide, after prayer, time, and counsel, to break it off with her, please do so as kindly as possible, remembering that none of us is perfect. was taught about God too,but if you gonna judge women on that moral then you WILL NEVER GET MARRIED.Think about it what's the chance of you meeting a female who is a virgin?Oh and you also gotta ask yourself are you a virgin.MARRY HER!!! Love doesnt go away because she had sex... If you don't love her just because she had sex, then you never loved her. I mean, sex before marriage isn't that bad. That's not what matters. Is she a nice person is what does.If you don't think she's special, think she's not worthy of u, and don't "think" you love her... do yourself and this poor girl a favor and politely tell her that you made a mistake and thought that you would be a better match than you are. Just tell her that you don't think your world views are compatible.God is about love and forgiveness;Tell her right away so she can move on with her life and find someone of real value that honestly loves her. You my friend should remain alone if this is your value system.IT'S LOVE afterall. You should be able to see past that.please don't be shallow'
Are you trying to say that you never once did anything sinful in your life that you don't regret? I am sure she regrets her mistakes. She was truthfull with you, because she is marrying you.

Now if she was still having sex with other men I don't blame you, but if you trust her, and love her then marry her. She has agreed to marry you and spend the rest of her life with you. That is what you wanted when you proposed. don't walk out on her. That is just wrong.
 I believe the bible also says hate the sin not the sinner. If you love her u would overlook that. We all make mistakes! God has already forgiven her why can't u! If you make ur choice to not marry her because of that, then sounds like u never really loved her at all.
get over yourself,i pray i have helped in some way,just keeping it real and truth sets us free at any cost.its all about acceptance,at the end of the day.Ask yourself whether you could be better with this girl or not. Then make a choice. Once you done with it there should be no looking back. feel free to keep in touch,i am here to help in any way PEACE be unto you and Peace be upon u  


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I specialise in helping couples save their marriage and rebuild it after major hurts such as an affair. Creating intimacy, removing hurt, dealing with sexual and communication problems.I can answer questions about issues arising in marriage: conflict, communication, listening, anger, verbal abuse, infidelity, addiction/substance abuse, pornography, physical abuse, time spent together, finances, in-laws, death of a spouse or child, separation and divorce,forgiveness,anger management issues, problem-solving and much more.


I have over 20 years as a counselor for couples experiencing difficulties. I have been a counselor for over 20 years,26years of marriage.I have been a student of this subject for over a decade and have not only researched it but lived it in my own life!

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I have a bachelor of Philosophy from CPCC in Charlotte NC I can comfortably answer questions about developing or salvaging a strong marriage relationship.

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I have a PhD in Metaphysics, Divinity, am a Minister with Friendship Baptist Church,faithful member, i would love to be a good samaritan to help couples to be blessed with positive answers.

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