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Marriage/Husband slept with my son - how to cope?

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I'm 45, been married for 2 years now. We have a 23-year-old son. We met in 2012, dated and got married last year. My son hasn't seen his dad since he walked out on me when our son was only 18 months old.
I found out last night that my husband had been having an affair with my son for a year now, and that he's planning on throwing me out.

I own half the house, so he can't just do that can he?

I knew my son was gay, he told me when he was 16, I'm accepting and open of that, but the fact he had an affair, with his stepdad, that's shocking and sickening.

My son admitted it, said he'd been secretly sleeping with him for over a year now, didn't care it was his stepdad, he said his stepdad was hot, he even said "He looks hot in his undies, super fuckable, we sleep together, so what the fuck."

I live in Britain, where the age of consent is 16, so nothing illegal's happened here, but still, I feel sick.

I am divorcing him, but he wants to stay married, have a marriage in name only, I told him this but he won't accept it, he gets all ranty and shouting.

I need advice from you, how can I cope?


In turmoil, need help, sorry if this is rushed - logged in from service station right now.

Answer
Hi Julie-

Divorce him and move on. I can't imagine what you must be going through. That's got to be both humiliating and devastating to you! All you can do is take it all a day at a time right now. As time goes on it might get a little better. Focus on putting your life back together and moving on. If you feel you need some therapy after all this, get it. This in no way is your fault, so don't think for one second that it is in anyway. No one could've predicted that. It's really a shame that they both hurt and betrayed you in this manner. It's going to take you awhile to cope and deal with all this. Try to stay strong though, you can and will get through this.

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