Masturbation/Female punished


I once read in a confidential masturbation survey where the participants were asked if they had ever been punished for masturbating and there was one story in particular that got my attention(source is it's dated June 9, 2005, here's the story; An anonymous heterosexual woman said that while growing up she had been caught masturbating by her mother several times and was punished each time for doing it, the punishment was the mother slapping her daughter on the hands to make her wish she had never masturbated, but the daughter disobeyed by continuing to masturbate anyway. Then when the woman was 16 years old, her mother punished her again for masturbating by spanking her hands again(she didn't say what her mother used for the spankings), then 12 spankings on her butt, and then the mother made the daughter spread her legs and started spanking her daughter's labias, she said the spanking of her vagina was sheer hell and she screamed but was too scared to close her legs to protect her vagina. This woman also said, and I quote "I am well over 30, I feel naughty and dirty if I touch myself more than necessary when using the bathroom, I try very hard to not ever masturbate even when I feel most horny, and I won't do it to please my husband although he wants me to". The trauma of her vaginal spanking seemed so severe that she also said "All girls should be trained to not play with themselves and that orgasm is not a right but a gift from your husband". I was very troubled by reading what had happened to her because I'm fully aware that a heterosexual woman having masturbation fantasies about beautiful and sexy guys is supposed to be a wonderful experience but it sounds to me that this experience was totally ruined for her, and I'm guessing probably ruined for the rest of her life, all because her vagina was spanked as a punishment for masturbating. I also know the main reason why both male and female masturbation has been stigmatized and given a bad name throughout history and it's mainly because of organized religions making people feel guilty and shameful about exploring their bodies sexually. Anyway, I guess my question is; What are your thoughts about the vaginal spanking that this poor woman had to go through simply for masturbating? And, does this mean that this woman, because of what happened, now associates the pain of the vaginal spanking to what's supposed to be the pleasurable sensation of masturbation?

I don't think many people are punished for masturbating.  Nearly all parents know that it's normal, healthy, and fun, and they have mostly done it themselves.  That doesn't mean no one is punished for masturbating, but I think it would be pretty rare.  Why do you suppose a woman who was punished for masturbating would write a sensational article about it for a web site or magazine?  You know they wouldn't.  You know it was something that was just made up.

So you don't need to worry about a fictitious woman.  The vagina is an internal organ that cannot be spanked.  I doubt very much that spanking a woman's external genitalia would discourage her from masturbating.

Thank you again for your question; feel free to ask more.


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Doug Adams, Ph.D.


I write from the point of view that masturbation is normal, healthy, and fun, and even necessary to sexual health. I am able to answer questions in all areas of sexuality.


I am the author of the web site and have been answering questions about sexuality (especially masturbation) from both males and females for over 13 years.

I have a Ph.D. in a field unrelated to sexuality from one of the leading educational institutions in the world.

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