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Meditation/It is me again

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Question
Dear Sir,

It is me James again.

I was reading your past helping messages..I found you are expert and excellent when solving others problems. I also found some cases similar to my life. You are doing something valuable to world. I do not know how to thank you. But I say this...

"I wish you wisdom , health , happiness and all the best for you. You are very kind expert".



Sir,

I am Native Buddhist.

I am very unfortunate person..because there are not meditation support in our country while it being Buddhist country..
(There are places..but it decrease fame and quality of our life if we go there to meditate....People care very differently if we go there..some think we are different and reject..some do not like to talk too (It is complicated to explain)..so I do not have anyone met who meditate (friends)...nobody meditate..Only cry and hide..no solution..(Heart broken people only do meditate)...So...I try on my own in home..No teachers..no groups..no support..)

Only people in internet help me.
You are one of them who is the most accurate.

Sir, here below is "How I meditate"

1. I sat on a chair
2. closed eyes.
3. Spine straight,
4.no movements, calm
5. Then I tried to focus on breathing.
6. I do not care about other thought..try to keep focus on breath.
7. When thoughts come simply say myself in mind "please help me to meditate" and back to breathe.
8. I did more than 45 minutes. Maybe 1 hour (30+30)
(yesterday also)

But I am not sure is this the correct way to meditate.
But I do it..I am not sure..because I do not understand meditation instruction videos and websites..
(My English is not fast and very good)

And,
I cannot let it (breathing) happen to normal if i start to think about it...I have to control it...if not, not breathing happening...(I mean I have to perform it)

And also thoughts are coming like hell....Unlimited and rapid.
But sometimes I can manage..But not much stable in 30 minutes..

*@* When I do meditate as I know it,strange feeling inside head like pushing, forcing, tight, and eyes pushing, forehead pulling out forcing,eyes strange, something middle of forehead strange, little headache was first when I start..Something inside head happening....Sometimes top of head area..some times front area....

Is that normal those feelings inside head ???
Not painful..Not hurting..
Please tell me is that normal ?? all in *@* ??

sometimes I am very sleepy.
(even after sleeping for 8 hours)

Please help me to meditate.

It is really important to me.

I am day by day happy after doing meditation, Specially because of feelings inside head. I think it is good sign (cortex developing, Neuro plasticity)...I am not sure...

Please this is very important to me and my life.
I saw in scientific experiment data that was heal mind and boost confidence by Mindfulness meditation.

Specially I need to sharp my mind for my future educations.
I told you that I am science student. I need to educate well.

So it is very very important to me.

Please tell me simply what to do.
I need Buddhism mindfulness.
It is the only way for me.
I do like it very much.

Please use simple English.
I am not very good at it.

I am not asking you to teach me online.
I just ask little but correct, instructions only.

Thank you very much.

Answer
Hi, James.

Thanks for  your nice words. First about how you meditate. It sounds ok. If you feel sleepy or have lots of thoughts, try leaving the eyes just a little bit open so some light comes in. It is ok to be aware of the breath, because it is there all the time. However, it is also ok to be aware of the feel of the body, the feel of the air around the body, the sense of the world around you.

Usually when we are aware of something, we focus on that one thing. If I hear a car go by, the usual way is to focus on that sound and then I am not aware of anything else. So, you might find that your mind seems to jump from one sound or feeling to another. After a while, you might find that it is easier to just hear or feel what is happening without trying to focus on it. You become still and let sensations come to you. You don't have to run after the sensations. It's possible for this to happen. It is a different way of being.

Let yourself become more and more sensitive. No matter what you feel, see if it is possible to feel it sensitively. You may find that if you become sensitive to what is really here at this moment, that you have forgotten about the thoughts.

Do not worry too much about thoughts.  Thoughts need time to come out, express themselves, and rearrange themselves. It is a sort of healing. They can do this on their own. You don't have to worry about it. When thoughts have enough time to heal, they will quiet down and it will be easier to feel the world around you and yourself.

Do not worry about the feelings in your head. It is normal to experience unusual feelings but if a certain feeling continues for a long time, it can be good to check with a doctor to make sure there is no physical problem.

It sounds like you have an interest in spending more time in meditation and I think if you follow my suggestions along with what you are already doing, it will be fine for you to sit for a long time. If you sit for a long time, you go deeper into yourself and into life. Sometimes it might feel difficult. You may sometimes feel confused or not know what to do. Life will find a way to help you. It is easier to do this work with other people but you can't do that now. So if it gets a little difficult, just remember that Life wants to help you and that there are many people in the world who are sitting quietly right now, even though you can't see them. And there are also many people who are suffering from the same difficulty that you have. So you can help them by being patient and strong, not running away or becoming too discouraged.

I hope that helps for now.

Meditation

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Jay Cutts

Expertise

From nearly 30 years of personal meditative work, I am interested in exploring together the deeper concerns of our lives. How can we shed light on these concerns for ourselves - directly, clearly, moment by moment? At the same time, how can we come in touch with the simple beauty and affection of live that reveals itself from time to time even though our lives often feel anything but simple, beautiful or loving. If you have a question, I will try to work with you to clarify and explore it. Note that I change private questions to public so they are available to others. If you have something that is truly private, let me know.

Experience

Close to 35 yrs experience in spiritual, meditative inquiry, first in the Zen tradition and later through direct inquiry rather than traditional practice. I have attended retreats and worked with Toni Packer, of the Springwater (NY) Center for Meditative Inquiry and am interested in the work of J. Krishnamurti, who also worked with people in direct, personal meditative inquiry.

Education/Credentials
BA Linguistics University of Michigan MA Special Education University of New Mexico

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