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Middle School Life/Friends with benefits


What does it mean when your only 13 and a guy wants to be friends with benefits? In 7th does it mean he wants to have sex with you already?

Hi Myka,

You questions needs a lot more questions answered before the answer can be more directed to you such as, is the guy older then you? Is this a guy you like? Is it a friend or childhood friend etc?

I will just answer based on assuming the boy is someone you like and is same age as you and in your class etc

Yes generally Friends with benefits mean exactly that, no emotional or commitment otherwise that involve sex.
But sex can be in different forms, oral or intercourse.
If you are not sure what he means, if he is only looking for oral or more its best to ask him to find out what he exactly means.
But if you had or have or plan on having a boyfriend please consider that most boys would not like this.
And even someone girls because they do not want to do it(have fwb) they will be jealous of you and make up stories and might even start calling you slut etc especially if you have more then one friend with benefit.
When I started some girls did call me Lankan Slut etc.
So its best to think about this before you decide.
Of course you will be more popular with the boys but when it comes to a relationship etc they might hold this against you and back off etc.
If you any follow-up questions etc please feel to give me a shout.

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I'm going to my final year in University after I finish my work term. I am originally South Asian, more specifically Sri Lankan. Growing up in Canada and the school system, I can help with peer pressure issues, boyfriend(s), friends with benefits as well as cultural/Racial issues when it comes to sex and pressure at school and outside of school and sex at school or during your time at school (ie high school years). I can also give some insight to problems when sex and cultural and social issues collide as well as dealing with parents and relatives who are strict as well as jealous girls. Having gone through all this I would like to use my experience to advise anyone who might have similar issues or questions and hopefully help them out. I turned to and wanted to volunteer here since long ago I came to the site by accident looking for advise and the advise I received did help me make some decisions and would like to return the favour. My original post/story is under (Middle School Life/Blowjob Slut under url ) for those who want a bit more insight into one of the issues I dealt with in school. You can ask me anything if you can tell me your age and cultural background if you think it will help and I will try my best to give my take on your issue, just a direction or something for you to think about not necessary to follow and hopefully it will help you.


My experience comes from going through highschool and facing issues because my cultural/racial differences and trying to fit in and trying to please everyone. I can relate to issues with cultural gaps and jealousy of girls. I have been called slut by tamil girls just because I was a bit more open minded. They had called me Lankan Slut, Tamil Slut, Sinhalse Slut etc all the while I learnt later that they were much more slutty then me and have done much more then me and just used me or called me that to make them look better. If you have such issues please let me know, I have been there. I have learned a lot and would like to share experience that can relate to your issues to help you out. I find having such or any help where you can remain unknown you can ask questions that you can not normally ask others and have cultural difference that affect social life with relatives, friends and at school is something different I can offer from my experience something I didnt have. And I still believe this not available since girls in our culture are scared to ask or talk about sexual issues and what I find more alarming is that there is no help set up for this since no one wants to take on this role since they believe it would look bad for anyone to be part of this or provide advise and they believe no one will approach them even if help was setup. Mostly fear of others finding out. Even if I can help one person, even if it makes me look like a slut, I will be happy to do that.

Sri Lankan, Lankan, Canadian, Toronto

I have successfully completed highschool and on track and doing well in University even on a work terms and will be going to my final year at university to finish my degree.

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