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Mind Games/Why does she play games?


In school, I fell as a desperate, needy guy in front of a girl I really liked. I creeped her out in the end and I really regret that. I was foolish of about the meaning of love and thought it was more a fairytale. I kept on trying and trying to show my attraction towards her who kept on declining me. I failed in the end. But you see my interest and perseverance to pursue her where stimulated by what I heard in songs and what the lyrics meant. I know I am crazy. But I guess, music is what i connect with really well and it showed me lies about how wonderful loving a person could be.

I still see her face. She knows I decline her too and am upset with the way things were. But I have seen her that she comes close and then as soon as I come close she walks away. For example, two days ago, during lunchtime, I was playing hand ball with friends and had to stand in a queue for my chance. I see her and her friend enter and wait on the sides. Then when I appear in the queue, they walk away... It's like she's playing a game that "who walks away first from each other". I can't imagine that she could hate me somehow, so much. Also, when she knows I am there she keeps her head turned in the other direction on an awkward stance. This is probably I have shown signs of avoiding her as well. Also, sometimes I see her, sometimes I don't at all. I don't see her some days, probably because in school she sits in a totally different place to where I sit, some days. What could be going through her mind? Why does she still hate me? I just didn't know the correct way of expressing myself and so I had to pay the price and I have learnt from my past mistakes
btw I am 16 and she is 13 years old.


I hate to break it to you, but I think she's made up her mind that she's not interested in you.

Think of it this way: Do you like Justin Bieber?  I didn't think so (ok, if you do, think of another singer or group you don't like).  Let's say Justin Bieber came out with a new hit song.  Would you listen to it?  If he came out with a new album, would you listen to it?  Probably not.  After all, you already heard what the guy had to offer BEFORE and you didn't like it, why should it be any different this time around?  Sure, you COULD try and spending the time and energy to listen to what he has to offer now, but why should it be any different?

In this analogy, you are Justin Bieber to the girl; maybe you're different or better now, but she already "tried" you, and she didn't like it, and she doesn't want to spend the time or energy to find out if you are actually any different.

Basically the only thing you can do is chalk it up to experience, go through the pain and remember that it can't last forever.  In the mean time, use that experience wisely: what do scientists do when they mess up?  They look at what probably went wrong, adjust and try again.  Be a scientist!  Trust me, this isn't the first time you're ever going to mess up with girls, and it probably won't be the worst.

Sorry to hear about the bad news!  Hope my advice was of some help!

Mind Games

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Besides having an immensely powerful sense of intuition, I am also currently studying (and having been privately studying for years) psychology, and grew up with around psychology and psychologists. I've read considerably in regards to biology, evolutionary biology, genetics, behavior therapy, conditioning and personality. There is almost no human pattern that does not make sense to me (but I'll admit, the opposite sex is a tricky subject!). If someone's behavior makes absolutely no sense to you, I'll be able to help you figure it out, and even give you suggestions on how to deal with it.


As mentioned above, currently studying psychology, a psychology-influenced upbringing, plus countless hours of giving people advice on the behavior of others.

Currently studying Psychology at the California Coastal College.

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