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Molestation/molested during sleep by a friend


Robin wrote at 2008-12-30 07:33:40
What your "friend" is doing to you is a serious crime (sexual battery.) People who are convicted of sexual battery are then registered sex offenders. Forget about the guy who dumped you two weeks ago - to be honest, he sounds like a jerk.

Although I wouldn't yell at you, I'd be on the same side as your friend who was upset with you. Read what you wrote - your guy "friend" is sexually abusing you. It seems that you're in a cycle where you have these negative experiences, they lower your self-esteem, and then your lower self-esteem makes you reluctant to stick up for yourself. Do what you need to do so you can stick up for yourself - be open with your girlfriends (your friend who yelled obviously wants to help you), see a counselor if you can. You need to get to a place where you can cut this guy out of your life. He is sexually (and now emotionally - trying to blame everything on you??) abusive. I don't even know you, but you deserve so much better. I hope you find some help.

TheMediator wrote at 2013-03-27 04:04:18
What those men did to you were serious crimes. And even if you don't want them in prison, at the very least you deserve an apology, because you are a human being.

In all honesty, you need to disregard what Sarah said. You should definitely not seek a romantic relationship with someone who thought that it was okay to abuse you, under any circumstances. If you want to keep him in your life, then fine. But you cannot do that at the cost of your own emotional well-being. I can only imagine what these events have done to your sense of self worth. And from what I read, they have definitely taken a toll.

You need to surround yourself with more support. If you have a bad time with men, find more women who will support you and take your side. The friend who yelled at you, even though she approached it the wrong way, is obviously someone who takes these things seriously. You need to find a counselor, or at the very least, someone who will listen to all that you have to say and support you.

You should most likely not talk to the guys that did it if you don't feel comfortable or safe. If you don't want to, or are frightened, then you need to find someone you trust to talk to first. Confronting them will be the quickest way to get closure. So, I suggest if necessary, you take this trusted friend with you to do so.

Above all, you need to forgive yourself. You are not a whore, not every good guy thinks so, none of this was your fault, you did nothing wrong, you acted appropriately, you are beautiful, you are strong, and you are going to put this behind you. You will find that perfect person soon enough. You will be happy, unafraid, and you will be surrounded by people who care about and respect you. I wish you the best of luck.


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Sarah Harrison


I am an expert and counselor on too. I am aware and have been through it all. I can answer your questions on being molested by my father, brother and how it feels as an adult to have dissociative identity disorder (DID) and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I can also answer questions on being in SAA, Sex Addicts Anonymous, AA, Alcoholics Anonymous, being married several times as I tried to run from all my fears, including getting lost on the road and yet I still would strike out to find a man even if I did get lost. There's not anything I can imagine that I wouldn't try to answer!


When I was fifty-nine years of age, I experienced an incorporation with Dr. William Tollefson, the gentleman that developed incorporation therapy. Now my three altars and I are one system instead of four of us fighting against each other. On top of the molestations of childhood, I was raped repeatedly in college by three men and left to die. I stayed in basically an abusive marriage for 26 years even though I was the one that was educated, six years of college. Organizations: United Methodist's Women's Group, Epiphany, Faith Partner's, Emmaus Walk Publications: Sarah Harrison has written several articles for the Women's Institute for Incorporation Therapy's monthly newsletter as well as articles for spiritual magazines. She has just recently published her own true tragedy of sexual abuse entitled, "You Love Your Daddy, Don't You?" Go to to view the website and order her book. Education/Credentials: Master's in Education, Specialist's in Education, Specialist's in Administration. Awards and Honors: Teacher of the Year, on the Board of the Finance Committee for Gwinnett Co. Board of Ed. for seven years, CASA volunteer in Forsyth Co. for four years. Past/Present Clients: Women's group at Birmingham United Methodist Church in Alpharetta, GA and Epiphany at Columbia, SC. I want to start engaging in speaking conferences for other women's groups as soon as possible now that my book is published.

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