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Molestation/concerned my 3.5 year old significantly speech delayed daughter was molested


I just received a call from child welfare in Oregon this evening stating when they took my nephew into state custody last week that they found a pair of my daughers panties in his possessions and they were concerned that he may have molested her. They problem is she is very smart but significantly speech delayed and only says a few words.  She started acting out with her behavior having temper tantrums which she never used to have, she is hitting and hurting her 16 month old sister alot more than normal.  She is also smacking her privates now besides just touching herself.  She is actually acting out so much and is withdrawing that we were gonna get her tested for autism.  Until 3 months ago I lived in Oregon with my mom and nephew.  He lived with my mom because he could not live at home with his mom because he had molested his brother 4 years ago.  How can I tell with a special needs child whether she has been molested?  I was molested as a child and I don't want her to have to suffer through the trauma/shame/guilt that I suffered.  Please help!!!!  Jennifer Lilly BSN/RN

Jennifer, all the evidence you have presented seems to point to a high probability of molestation, based upon known symptoms and her recent change in behavior.

If you can connect to her emotional state using dolls, drawings or other forms of communication that she can relate to, then use that to see if she can convey that she's been hurt. Have her pediatrician do an exam, if possible, to verify signs of penetration or other irritation/infections.

For both of you, try modified versions of EFT (emotional freedom technique), geared to her communication levels and/or learn it for yourself and try it in surrogate mode. EFT energy techniques are highly effective for neutralizing sexual trauma memories that you carry in your mind and body.

EFT info at many sites like:

I hope this is helpful for you,

William Silver  


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William Silver


I can address all questions about physical, sexual, emotional trauma and how to eliminate the effects from your life. I specialize in assisting clients with a 1 to 3-hour session that can discharge all of the negative feelings around any type of emotionally based problem. I can direct you to some websites where you can download information to assist you and your loved ones with emotional problems. I can also assist directly on the phone or via email, in addition to personal sessions, here in San Diego, California. I am not a licensed therapist, lawyer or law enforcement officer.


I have been a holistic health therapist for a total of over 15 years, specializing in anxiety-phobia, trauma release work.

TFT/EFT training, Cranio-Sacral Therapy, SHEN, Reiki, Hypnotherapy.

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