About Jennifer Goodwin Expertise Can answer questions about OCD, especially obsessions. Will not confirm whether someone has OCD but can help someone cope with their obsessions and compulsions. I can answer questions on medications used for OCD but will not get into dosage information as I am not a medical doctor.
Experience Have had OCD for 28 years and have been through numerous therapies, such as CBT and participated in research as far as finding the genes responsible for OCD with the John Hopkins University group. Experience with various medications for OCD and depression. I work in a health community center and am very much in tune with mental health issues.
Education/Credentials Do not have a degree in psychology but I believe that a person's life experience can be a great contribution to other people living with the same problems. I have spent most of my life in pursuit of understanding OCD, depression and anxiety disorders and still am doing extensive research.
Expert: Jennifer Goodwin Date: 1/6/2008 Subject: Ocd in relationships
Question One of my biggest issues with ocd is that I fear being infected with hiv. I want to know if this is common. I cannot picture myself in a healthy new relationship because of being afraid that getting close to someone will give me aids. I can't move forward into a relationship because I think that having sex will give me hiv, even if they have been told they do not have it. I do not think other people are as mentally aware of this risk, and that they do not protect themselves, so how do they really know if they are at risk? It's a life crushing obsession. I get tested monthly, and I stay awake at night crying over the fear that I either have hiv or that I will never be able to have a relationship for the fear that that person will have aids.
Answer Dear Elizabeth,
Yes, fear of aids is common in OCD. Everyone is afraid of contracting HIV but especially folks with OCD, this can be a very distressing obsession..because it does create some problems when it comes to relationships, so do other obsessions. I don't know if you are in a relationship at the moment, but if you are, how close are you to that person? Do you think that person would understand your situation? If that person does not understand, then they can not be of any help to you, and would not make for a good partner. Are you getting any help for your fear of HIV? If you are not in a relationship, then my advice to you would be not to stress yourself about how your problem would affect you in a future relationship. First thing first. Get help first. And of course, not only you, but everyone should not take a person's word about not having HIV. Everyone in this world has to be careful and get tested. That is very smart of you and please realize that this is your logic talking here. We all want to be in good relationships, so I totally understand your longing to be in one...but you have to take care of yourself first. You are the most important person right now. There are great strategies to help you with this. I hope you have consulted a mental health professional..and especially have considered CBT. From what I can read, you are a well informed person, and your fear of HIV is taking more space in your life than it should but it does stem from very realistic life issues, thus making it more stressful for you. I totally understand. You are aware I'm sure that monthly testing for HIV is not necessary if you are protecting yourself..this is a compulsion. Knowledge is power, make sure you understand how HIV is contracted. Maybe one way of lessening the fear would be to learn how to live without getting checked every month....but you should do this while under a counselor's care, so you can learn how to manage the anxiety caused by the uncertainty. OCD is not called the doubting disease for nothing! Just make sure the therapist you choose knows a lot about OCD. It's very important. You will be able to be in a relationship, there are good understanding people out there. But like I said, it would not be a good idea to get into one now without having more knowledge and power over your fear. Sometimes I can miss out in my answers because I don't have enough info to go with, but if there is anything you want clarified, don't hesitate to ask for a follow-up.
