Expert: vanessaoz - 10/30/2009

Question
I am a 16 yr old girl and I like a guy whom I met online on O rkut.He is 7 yrs older 2 me!We both r very similar to each other and we can talk about anything...from life,love to politics.He is very kind,gentle and caring.I once told him that I like him.It was just 2 months that I knew him then!He told me that he deosnt know me well and that we should get to know each other saying that he would love to have me as his partner.Not its a year and a half that I knw him though we have never met in person.He isnt always online as he is a very driven and ambitious person and very focused towards his aims in life.But whenever I am facing any problem in my life he is always there for me..Advicing me and assuring me that everything will be fine.We have a lot in common and often he says stuff that I wanted 2 speak.I was there with him[in the sense online]when two of his best friends expired and I helped him through it all.He says that I am angel in his life and that he feels relieved when he talks to me.I feel for him the same way but never told him so.I have learnt a lot from him as in I have become more compassionate after meeting him.Again I never told him that.But he says that I have changed hhis life in a no. of ways for good.We can talk for 5 to 6 hours at a stretch.He says the guy I will find will be much beyond my expectations and will always keep me happy.But on the other hand says that I am his replica and he would like to be with a girl who would be similar to him.I am sooo confused.Please help me!

Answer
hi Krishtiana,

thanks for your email,

i can see your confusion. you are very young to be with a guy 7 years older then you are but i understand why your having the feelings that you do have for him. i think he realizes that he is too old for you and hence why he says he would like a girl similar to him and also talks of the right guy for you.

i feel you need to let him know how you feel, even though i know this will be hard for you to do. at least you will know how he feels and whether its worth wile to pursue this kind of relationship. maybe all you both will be is good friends, which is also good,as you cant have too many friends especially those you can talk to about anything.

sounds like it might be a while before you both meet and who knows in time if when your 20 and he is 27 things might be different, at the moment the age difference is just too big for both of you to handle.

think about what ive written and i hope you work out the best way to handle this relationship.

good luck
vanessaoz