Expert: vanessaoz - 6/29/2009

Question
I had an online relationship that lasted about 1 month.It started when this guy invited me to chat by sending me his e-mail address on tagged.com,at first I wanted to ignore him but then he asked again and well he seemed genuine so we started talking online.We really connected and I could tell he was interested in the conversations we had because we talked almost everyday for hours.He shared things with me online like some music he recorded and he even let me see him on webcam and then he sent me his picture.I think the problem started when he deleted his tagged account where we first met and he didn't even mention it to me even though we talked online almost everyday.I asked him and he said that he didn't have any use for his tagged account anymore and I accepted his explanation.So we continued chatting and getting closer then he stopped contacting me as much as before or took a long time to answer my messages.Then I found out he had opened a new tagged account and didn't add me as a friend on this new account.He didn't tell me about it either I found out because I was searching for my brother on tagged and did an address book search and since his e-mail was in my contacts he showed up in the search.The mistake I made was to ask him if he was still on tagged and he said yes.He talked to me after i found out but not like before he took long to respond to my messages when chatting and he didn't have much to say in conversations as before.Then one morning I saw him online and said hi and he didn't answer me at all,so I sent him a message telling him how hurt I was by all this still no answer.Then after I sent a message saying sorry for saying the things i did earlier in the message still no answer.Sometimes days after when i see him online I tried to talk to him and he would answer but not as before, he sounded mad.I really apologized too him because I thought it was my fault he was mad,so i kept on trying to get on his good side again and it ended because one day he used obscene language and told me to leave him alone so I never contacted him again.Please I need your help did this relationship go wrong because of me?

Answer
hi denise,

thanks for your question...

i think he seems like a guy who doesnt want to make any commitments with one girl right now. he probably enjoyed getting to know you but then had enough and wanted to move on. i know that sounds terrible but thats how some guys work, particulary if they are young.

i dont feel you have done anything wrong nor did you need to apologize. he seemed to be hiding things from you or didnt feel you were that close that he needed to tell you that he deleted his account or made a new one.

grow from this experience and be thankful you found out about him now and not a few years down the track. nobody should use obscene language to you, shows little respect for you.

good luck in the future
vanessaoz